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January 14, 2009 |
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Cause She's Not
FOUND by Danielle Meyer
in Cambridge, MA
I picked up this folded yellow piece of paper on Harvard's Campus. I unraveled the well considered folds to find this amazing note: short, sweet and to the point. I love how well-punctuated it is.
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Gang Aft Agley August 11, 2006 |
Last Warning February 15, 2004 |
In Other Words June 09, 2002 |
Karen's Guide January 04, 2007 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
I refer you to Mr. Roger's as a response:
http://pbskids.org/rogers/songlist/song4.html
Wow.. harsh.
I hope she still believes she's beautiful. Doesn't really matter what YOU think. (and I hope the notewriter gets panty crickets, just for being a jerk.)
Isn't she lovely?
Isn't she wonderfull?
Isn't she precious?
Less than one minute old.
I never thought through love we'd be
Making one as lovely as she
But isn't she lovely made from love.
Well, she probably thinks you're ugly too, so I hope you don't think you're all attractive or anything.
Most girls are pretty, but some are not. The note writer is being rude by pointing out one who is not. He should be dragged through the puddle of doom. And the previous posters are correct that the note writer is probably ugly too.
Word up.
She might not be pretty, but her handwriting sure is... and she's an Obama fan!
...unless of course this was writen by the guy who screens the American Apparel models.
Pretty is as pretty does. And the writer of this note has done an un-pretty thing. I bet the girl referred to is prettier than Miss Jealous Thang.
The Lord don't like ugly.
The outpouring of sympathy in these comments is totally baseless. The subject of this note could very well be a snaggletoothed, moose-faced, balding, wart-covered meth addict who gave the writer's ex-boyfriend a BJ to raise money for a fix.
Not all nastiness, abuse and brutally honest criticism are undeserved.
Ah, ahuh, this take me back. I remember in high school a girl in my class telling another girl in my class that she didn't like me because I'm ugly. I might have gotten my sensitive little feelings hurt if she were pretty or even just alright, but she was to the curb...curb...curb.
...I guess even Harvard is full of twits...
@hiplainsdrifter ... could have been written by a townie who got rejected by a brilliant, good looking Harvard undergrad. (What Minnie Driver didn't do to Matt Damon in 'Good Will Hunting.')
Ohoo, Burn. Someone's jealous. Or just brutally honest.
Two theories:
a) Either this 'she' is an ugly person both inside out and warranted such gossip about her with her nasty nature.
or,
b) The writer is just a jealous, miserable bitch.
This note is neither sweet nor well-punctuated.
ditto, Nightingale.. I fail to see how accomplishing the insertion of four apostrophes and a period can be impressive punctuation. Since there's nothing to end the final phrase, I have to assume that it is unfinished. How would it end?
'Cause she's not; she's faaaaabulous!
Flargy, do most of the snaggletoothed, moose-faced, balding, wart-covered meth addicts who give peoples' ex-boyfriends BJs to raise money for a fixes you encounter think they're pretty? Pretty desperate, I suppose.
i looove yellow paper like that
and honestly girls who think they're pretty when they look beat bug me too..
I'm hot 'cause I'm fly.
You ain't 'cause you not.
@ lipstick vogue, that Mr. Rogers song is horribly rife with gender stereotypes. *sigh* just another children's show designed to brain wash the world.
a face only a mother could love.
First of all, what's with all the emphasis based on outward appearance aimed at women? And why are we perpetuating it? Even if this woman doesn't ascribe to The Patriarchy's narrow-minded definition of beauty, does that give the note-writer a pass to write this note? And who cares what the note-writer looks like? That's just perpetuating what's wrong with the note in the first place. How about this: the problem is society and that the note-writer 1) buys into The Patriarchy, which is harming everyone involved 2) is obviously unhappy with hirself (not a typo -- specifically gender-neutral) and 3) another two victims of The P are being exposed to us 4) many of us bought into it as well. Sad. This note is very sad.
Sorry about the "in in."
I like to let the nameless, faceless drunks on "Hot or Not" tell me how pretty I am.
This looks like a guy's handwriting, but guys don't write notes like this--other girls do. So I'm confused.
Ron,
I don't know if "rife" is quite right. "Girls are girls from the beginning" and "girls grow up to be mommies" strikes me as less offensive than holding a woman up to a standard of prettiness to determine her worth. You may read into Rogers' words what you will, but he does not suggest anywhere within the text what the terms "girls" and "mommies" might mean.
Yours,
Mouth
Roy Orbison clearly disagrees...
Pretty woman, walking down the street
Pretty woman, the kind I like to meet
Pretty woman
I don't believe you, you're not the truth
No one could look as good as you
Mercy
Pretty woman, won't you pardon me
Pretty woman, I couldn't help see
Pretty woman
That you look lovely as can be
Are you lonely just like me
Wow
Pretty woman, stop a while
Pretty woman, talk a while
Pretty woman, gave your smile to me
Pretty woman, yeah yeah yeah
Pretty woman, look my way
Pretty woman, say you'll stay with me
'Cause I need you, I'll trear you right
Come with me baby, be mine tonight
Pretty woman, don't walk on by
Pretty woman, make me cry
Pretty woman, don't walk away, hey...okay
If that's the way it must be, okay
I guess I'll go on home, it's late
There'll be tomorrow nigh, but wait
What do I see
Is she walking back to me
Yeah, she's walking back to me
Oh, oh, Pretty woman
@ pretty and witty and briiight
I have never heard the term "panty crickets" before. It's truly equal parts disgusting and hilarious.
I remember her well. Her name was Paula and I met her 50 years ago in the first grade.
Ode to my very first "love," Paula.
When I looked at her and she looked back, it scared me
Don't know why I kept looking
When I chased her and caught her, I wanted to gag
Don't know why I never did.
When I spoke to her and she spoke back, it hurt my ears
Don't know why I kept listening
When she sat next to me, it embarrassed me
Don't know why I never moved
If I saw her walking down the hallway, I would go the other way
But somehow passed her anyway
When we played together, she made me feel like a sissy
But the games went on
When she kissed me, I wanted to run away
Don't know why I never did.
When she moved away, I was very glad
Don't know why I cried
Don't know why I remember her to this day
Bob Connell, your poem made me cry! Thirty-something years ago, my best friend was a boy named Robbie. We were inseparable. When I moved from San Francsco to England, he cried. He gave me a gold bracelet. I still have that bracelet. We were seven years old. We lost touch after that.
Sorry, I meant Bob Conner, not Connell. Blurry vision from tears...
@ Teacher in in the classroom:
It's not nice to steal someone's alias! That pretentious poster was not me.
For God's sake, it's college. Do you even remember how miserable college can be? We don't know either of these women (and the note-scribe is clearly female), but it's pretty run of the mill as that kind of note goes. Most women have both written said note and also been the butt of it. Such is life. Try to rein in the harsh judgement, shall we? College students are not yet fully formed human beings and ought to be afforded the allowances made for other creatures still wet behind the ears.
Oh no, I'm sorry -- I was just being honest. I didn't realize it was taken. I'm new. I'll find a new one if I post again.
Wait, in what way was I pretentious? And why would you insult me like that (and by like that, I mean passive-aggressively)?
Oh my dear Feeling IN coherent, (and everyone else to whom the term panty crickets is a new one) you simply MUST go visit the Find titled
Anti-Fourth of July. Do not pass go, do not collect $200, and by all means, DO NOT skip the comments section. It's a FoundMagazine Classic.
http://foundmagazine.com/comments/1524
@ the other teacher:
My apologies. I jumped to conclusions and assumed that someone was purposely trying to pass themselves off as me. (It has happened on Found before, just not to me.) I guess that made me a little snippy.
I actually enjoyed your post and will think twice before being rude in the future. I've been thinking I might change my name anyway. . . oh the possibilities!
Maria
Memories are what life is about; without them we would simply be objects moving through an empty, emotionless space.
Do you ever wonder what he's doing now? I wonder constantly what Paua is doing and what roads she took in her life's journey. Funny thing is, her father worked for the railroad and I picture her life as a journey down the endless tracks, never to see her again. Somehow, that's OK. Seems appropriate for life.
@Teacher: I'm glad we got that sorted out. I feel like we should hug. Or, you know, just get on with our lives. :)
I think this is a unique name, but please let me know if not.
Not everyone has the same standard of beauty. Just about anyone is probably attractive to somebody.
There are people who are attracted to fat people, some who like hairy people, some who like amputees, some people who only really care about the look of someone's feet, and even people who have a fetish for people who are ill.
In my case, I've dated one person who was short and fat, and someone else who was tall and skinny with bad acne. Thinking of either of them still makes my heart beat faster than any of the people on the celebrity magazines' Most Beautiful People lists.
I didn't think folks used the words pretty or beautiful or lovely or cute any more. Especially those of typical college age. It's Hot: as in "I hope she doesn't think that she's hot. 'Cause she's not" My son, who recently left Teenage Wasteland but has yet to leave the nest, will not talk to a girl,look at a girl, much less date one, unless she's "hot." Back in the Day, hot meant sexually suggestive, even slutty. (Judging from the constant, ever-changing parade of hotties that pass through my kitchen on the way to Sonny's bedroom, it still means that, IMO.)
I, on the other hand, a former cute babe myself, made it a point not to date attractive men. Their insufferable egos turned me off. A plain man, a homely guy, a hideous dude...these attracted me because they were real and interesting and sincere and treated me like a princess. How did I raise such a shallow, self-centered jerk? I agree with the new teacher. Too much emphasis is placed on physical attractiveness. That should be last on the list of qualifications for anything. But even in the job market or on reality TV shows, it's the hot chick, the hunky guy, who gets the gig. Everyday People need not apply. It's enough to make me hurl my Cheerios.
Pretty is as pretty does.
Wouldn't it be awesome if you COULD judge a person's character by their looks? Mother Theresa would have been gorgeous! Gandhi would have been a total stud!
@ Mom...
I love your point.
Maria,
Find Robbie!!! You must! That's what the internet is for! Google him!
He cried for you. Find him!!!
And also, I hope she DOES think she's pretty, whether she's the writer's idea of pretty or not.
Bob Conner:
I do wonder what he's doing now. When the internet made it easier to find people, I tried looking him up in the San Francisco area. Unfortunately, he has a very common surname, and there were just too many of the same name to narrow down. Of course, he may not even be in the same area. I've since moved around quite a lot myself, between England and the USA, so it's hard to say. I hope he's having a happy life. He was really sweet.
okay everyone.. post a message on your local craigslist, looking for THE Bob Conner.. I'll bet he still remembers Maria just as fondly, and has likely run into the same obstacles doing a whowhere-type people search.
You never know, you know?
THE Bob Conner has a long-running radio morning show in Columbus Ohio. If he wanted to find his long-lost sweetie, he'd just have to say so on the air.
I feel badly for the person this writer is talking about. I don't like thinking of girls as ugly, because I know I shouldn't be talking, and I know how bad it feels to be called things like 'ugly'. So I just don't like to be the person to bring such mean words to others.
This note reminded me of the part in American Beauty where Angela and Jane are arguing and Angela says "Well at least I'm pretty" and Ricky cuts in and says something like "No you aren't. And you're boring. And you're ordinary." And it absolutely destroys her.
I like to think the writer of the note was alluding to the fact that while the girl in question was perhaps considered outwardly "pretty", it couldn't mask the ugliness inside of her.