January 23, 2009

Bra Request
FOUND by Dan Regan in The Library
This was found in our library book drop bin.
32E in the chest
Not until you learn to spell, dear. And have the courage to ask your mom in person (I can understand the dad thing, though).
+ January 23, 2009 02:24 AM +
Monkey in denial
I'm sorry dear, but if we bought you a bra we'd also have to buy you something to stuff it with (since you're obviously lacking the natural equipment for filling one) and we just can't afford that right now.
blame the recession(and your slow puberty)
+ January 23, 2009 04:02 AM +
Farmer in In The Dell
This note probably won't be effective. It's hard to ask for things, and harder to admit you're too scared to ask in person.

Still, I bet it was good for the writer to get it off her chest. Bwhahahahaha.
+ January 23, 2009 05:06 AM +
tasi in the water's edge
Poor kid is mortified to even write the note, then MOM goes & leaves it at the library, for all the world to see. Inconsiderate.
+ January 23, 2009 05:46 AM +
Night in gale
"...don't tell Dad I wrote this." Are you kidding? Honey, Mom is going to FRAME this!
+ January 23, 2009 06:37 AM +
Librarian in the woodwork

Mom probably works in the library, so son or daughter left this note for her there in the book drop, forgetting that mom was training that new person and wouldn't be emptying thebook drop herself.

And I can see especially being terrified Dad will find out about it if the note writer is the son and not the daughter.

You wouldn't want him so be enbesised, would you?
+ January 23, 2009 06:46 AM +
angie in asheville
I always hate to be enbesised.
+ January 23, 2009 07:03 AM +
lying in jason mraz's arms
literally laughing out loud at the attempt to spell "embarassing".

and @ librarian...i highly DOUBT that it was mother's son who dropped this off. just saying....
+ January 23, 2009 07:23 AM +
Librarian in the woodwork
@ lying in ... and the kids I know who had (have) gender dysphoria had it kick in full steam ahead at around that age. Just saying....
+ January 23, 2009 07:42 AM +
Feeling in coherent
I don't look forward to the day my daughters start asking for this.

Seriously though, isn't 5th grade kind of early? Or are all the girls developing early now because of the hormones in their food?
+ January 23, 2009 07:48 AM +
fooch
Gotta have a place to put my flaps, mom.
+ January 23, 2009 07:49 AM +
Jonathan too in not the library
Nearly as enbesising as not being able to spell.
+ January 23, 2009 08:00 AM +
Turbo in the Thunderdome
What's a brax and where can I get one?
+ January 23, 2009 08:17 AM +
Hiplainsdrifter in South Portland, Maine
@ Librarian - Is this your daughter's note?
+ January 23, 2009 08:17 AM +
Hiplainsdrifter in South Portland, Maine
My guess is "MOM" never got this note as it was drafted here - and it was stuck to other book that was returned...

+ January 23, 2009 08:26 AM +
Geek NOT in my mom's basement
so the girl got up the courage to write the note, then she loses it at the library. Poor thing was probably mortified. Or would she be mertifed?

If I was a pedophile at the library and found this, I'd be--wait, nevermind. I'm not a pedophile and that joke wouldn't be funny. Although "A pedophile walks into a library" does have potential.
+ January 23, 2009 08:32 AM +
Librarian in the woodwork

@Hiplainsdrifter ... all my kids can (and do) spell better than this, so I'd say it wasn't written by any of my offspring (male or female).

And, by the way, I like how this kid got "PPS" correct (save for the punctuation) rather than trying "PSS".
+ January 23, 2009 08:43 AM +
boobies in my over the shoulder boulder holder
I think the proper spelling is "skeered."

Oh, and Feeling, even a couple decades ago, many fifth grade girls had boobies big enough to warrant wearing a bra. (more so now, though- and sure. the hormones.)

My fourth grader is currently sprouting little boobie "buds." (and will surely kill me when she learns I dared to even mention it, so sshhhhh)

There is also an epidemic of childhood obesity in full swing, so lots of kids (of both genders) have ..um.. flaps in the chest area.
with a wiggle and a walk and a jiggle and a jog, some might feel more comfortable (especially, say, in gym class) if the gelatinous portions are contained.

(and I'm thrilled to have had this opportunity, on a Friday morning, to use the word BOOBIES no fewer than four times by 7:15 Pacific time. Thank you, Foundmagazine!)

+ January 23, 2009 09:05 AM +
brain problem situation in my head
A written request for a bra? WOW! My mom had to trick me into wearing one. A whole subterfuge operation involving family friends took place at the mall. I wound up cornered and terrified in the lingere department while the sales lady and my Mom's ancient friend, Erma (they knew I couldn't fight a sweet 75-year-old woman)wrasseled me into one. Strapped in and defeated, I had a single request. Cut off the stupid pink ribbon bow in the middle.

I think I have PTSD.
+ January 23, 2009 09:31 AM +
brain problem situation in my head
P.P.S. I saw a request for a brawl on my Appalachian cousin's Christmas list. Is it wrong to correct the spelling on a child's Christmas list? It was taped to the 'fridge, right there for everyone to see. I pulled her aside and explained that bra was short for brassiere and that brawl was a good old fashioned ass whooping. She understands now, but wants a sports bra for the brawl.
+ January 23, 2009 09:34 AM +
Just me in my house
Please, Lady, just buy your daughter a bra. It's not a big deal. And NOT buying her one won't guarantee that she'll stay your little girl forever. Face it, she'll need one eventually.

Take it from one who was also the only 5th grader who didn't have a bra. It WAS very embesising!
+ January 23, 2009 10:23 AM +
Librarian in the woodwork
@ just me ... I'm woundering whether you went to an all girls school. Actually, I hope so.
+ January 23, 2009 10:55 AM +
Terrie-Is-So-Very in totally-unique-ville
This reminds me of the drama over my daughter wanting to shave her legs.

Just buy the poor dear a bra, some pads, and some shavers--once she starts getting crazy over the boys, you'll have bigger things to worry about.
+ January 23, 2009 11:42 AM +
mlm in texas
Awww, I think this letter is sweet, except for the horrible spelling. Brain Problem, I can totally relate. I was one of the only girls in the 4th grade to wear a bra (my Mother MADE me) and it was very traumatic! The shirt I had on the first day I wore it was a little thin (I had no idea), so EVERYONE could see it. The boys kept popping it and the girls kept asking about it. Believe me, it's just as enbesising to be one of the first ones to wear one as it is to be one of the last ones to get one. I, too, have BRPTSD (bra-related post traumatic stress disorder).
+ January 23, 2009 12:03 PM +
Mountain Girl Stuck in an Illinois cornfield
This note is so precious. I wounder if they have shower rooms for PE in her school. Imagine the humiliation of being the only bare-chested babe, with all the other girlies prancing around in their marvelous braxes. Come on Mom. What's wrong with a little flat training brax? I agree 100% with Just Me.

Also Mom, you need to work on better communication with your young daughter. She shouldn't have to resort to asking for a brax in a note because she's sceard to ask you in person. Bigger questions loom in the near future, and you need to be ready with some good answers. In fact, don't wait for her questions. Start talking, now!
+ January 23, 2009 12:10 PM +
Mountain Girl Stuck in an Illinois cornfield
@ Librarian: I was embesised to find out that all my life I've been writing P.S.S. instead of the proper P.P.S. WoW! I assume P.P.S. means post postscript; in my version, it's Post Script Secondary. And I was only writing it that way because that's how all my friends wrote it. Oh, well, live & learn I always say.
+ January 23, 2009 12:20 PM +
Veronica in Edmonton
When I got boobies, I didn't even want a bra, I thought it rather pointless, but I was one of the first to develop in my class, and had like C cups when I was in fifth grade.
I hated having boobs in elementary, everyone made fun of you.

+ January 23, 2009 12:22 PM +
Hiplainsdrifter in Man Boobs, Maine

I remember when I was in 5th grade and I was diagnosed with "gynecomastia"... I thought my world would come to end. My mother refused to get me a mansiere (a "Bro" to those in the know), and I was forever getting nurples on my moobs, or "bitch tits" as the guys use to say... shouting "throw some D's on that bitch!" in the locker room. I remember writing my Mom a note like this... which I put in one of her library books - hoping she's find it, but she returned the book and she never saw it. Unfortunately, my Dad worked at the library, he found the notem and then he beat the living shit out me....
+ January 23, 2009 12:49 PM +
Linlaw in Plymouth England
@Mountaingirl...Because all your friends did? Next you'll be wanting a bra just because they have them.
+ January 23, 2009 12:58 PM +
Mountain Girl Stuck in an Illinois cornfield
@ Linlaw: LOL! Actually I burned my bra in 1971. It was the feminist thing to do. Haven't been able to stand having one on ever since. Of course, by now I'm all saggy & frumpy-looking, but I'm comfortable, so that's all that matters.
+ January 23, 2009 01:13 PM +
spider in the web
Oh god, I sympathise entirely. I was the last one in the year to need a bra, and it was truly horrific. When I did first wear a bra - a triple A, and I'd begged my mum for months to let me get it - my whole class actually applauded once a girl pointed it out, much to my utter humiliation.

Seriously, MOM, talk to your daughter and buy her a bra for Christ's sake! You may not have any idea of the heartache involved but take it from us Foundians.
+ January 23, 2009 01:46 PM +
...
Hiplains Drifter's coolness factor just went up, like, four points! woot!
+ January 23, 2009 01:57 PM +
out in the cold rain and snow
is it possible to have priapism of the nipples? or is that just a guy pee pee thing?
OK. Call it terminal nipplus erectus then.
Apparently I need a bulletproof bra this week.
+ January 23, 2009 01:59 PM +
Lolita
Anyone want to have more fun with boobies:

http://www.feelyourboobies.com/
+ January 23, 2009 02:38 PM +
brain problem situation in my head
@Highplains"D" Did you know that gynecomastia can be caused by too much THC? You might want to reconsider getting so folded all of the time.
+ January 23, 2009 02:45 PM +
Librarian in the woodwork
You know what? I've never heard guys talking about being the last guy in gym class to get a jock strap. What's up with that?
+ January 23, 2009 03:05 PM +
Geek NOT in my mom's basement
@Librarian: where I came from, jock straps were mandatory at a certain age (I don't remember which grade, but it might have been 7th) so all the boys started wearing them at the same time. That said, the first day of PE I took a little longer than normal loitering in the hallway and barely got dressed in my gym clothes in time. Consequently I was the last guy to wear a jock strap (by about 3 minutes) and it was embarrassing.
+ January 23, 2009 03:15 PM +
Schneh
For you Foundians:

This is a site you might like, somewhat similar to Found and PostSecret.
http://www.learningtoloveyoumore.com/

People from all over the world send in their responses to assignments, making it a sort of giant collaborative art project.

Enjoy.
[Sorry if it's already been mentioned here.]
+ January 23, 2009 03:20 PM +
Hiplainsdrifter in South Portland, Maine
DAD,

I was woundering if I could start wearing
a JockxBecause, It's gonna be very
enbesising being in 5th grade and not
being able to wear one. I know
you keep saying OH, no you don't need
one, but I sick of that! im in 5th
grade now and have huge balls!

ps. If you were wounder
why I didn't ask you this
in person I was sceard.
pps. please dont
tell mom I wrote
this she might
wash me extra
hard in the tub
with the lava
soap, and make
me say extra
prayers in
my closet...
+ January 23, 2009 03:20 PM +
Finsterton Smythe in 620 State St, Schenectady NY
As a man I must admit I have absolutely no idea how to field the emotions or contemplate the complexities of this topic except to say I do understand the fear involved of asking your parent for something big or personal or important... I know this is a "Go ask your Mother" topic for just about all men...
+ January 23, 2009 03:22 PM +
Hiplainsdrifter in South Portland, Maine
@Finsterton - How's things down to the county building? Get over to the correctional facility much?
+ January 23, 2009 03:32 PM +
Mountain Girl Stuck in an Illinois cornfield
And furthermore, I don't see why a girl-child needs her mom's permission to wear a bra in the first place. Is it like some time-worn tradition that moms take their daughters shopping to buy their first bras? They sure don't need mom's permission to get birth control pills. What makes a bra so taboo?
+ January 23, 2009 03:40 PM +
Phoebe Muse in young ladies department of Mott's
AWWWW sweetie being mortified that dad will find out?Guess millions of people now knowing on the internet isn't so bad.
+ January 23, 2009 03:52 PM +
Finsterton Smythe in 620 State St, Schenectady NY
@ Highplainsdrifter---
Huh? whatchyou talkin bout Willis?
+ January 23, 2009 04:00 PM +
Mom Interrupted in the lingerie, buying something special for The Twins.
My daughter is in the 5th grade and started wearing a bra this year. It's just a short camisole, really. I bought them so she'd get used to wearing something everyday.

I don't see why Mom wouldn't buy one if her daughter wants one.

+ January 23, 2009 04:56 PM +
Hiplainsdrifter in South Portland, Maine
@Finsterton - lol - I was amused by the street address and googleEarthed the address.... up on Veeder street it looks like there is a police station with an attached correction facility
+ January 23, 2009 07:01 PM +
Me in the dark, dark night
As a mother of teen and preteen girls, I know a bit about this subject. Start with a sports bra! No need for fitting and fussing. Easy, comfy, no-nonsense. The world of cups and underwires and Victoria's Secret are just around the corner, so ya keep it easy and simple and innocent for as long as possible. I hate wearing a bra, but do it to be socially acceptable. I still remember my first bra...4th grade...my mom made me go to the dept. store and get fitted for it. Mortifying.
+ January 23, 2009 08:22 PM +
blah
Have a little compassion. Everyone's different, and some people just have trouble spelling. And besides, she's probably only 11. Poor girl..to feel she has to write a note to her mom instead of just talking to her about it. It's a shame these natural stages of growth and change are now such "topics" and blown so out of proportion in our culture..come on man, it's just life!

Besides, she probably already is developing, what with all the xenoestrogens in everything we eat and drink, girls will probably be having their periods when they're 5 in a few years, ha. :(
+ January 23, 2009 09:32 PM +
as a teenage girl...
as a teenage girl, i know exactly what this girl is going through.
Actually, when i got my first bra when i was 10, i wrote a note to my mom too. I was just too embarassed to actually ask her in person. Also, the only reason i even asked her was because a few days before she was helping me with my hair and she told me that i would need a bra soon.
Now that i'm older i have no problem asking my mom if we can go to victoria secrets. its actually fun.
+ January 23, 2009 10:51 PM +
Just me in my house, just remembering some details
Actually it was 6th grade for me. I was the only one left in my class who didn't have one. In the locker room before gym class one day I was standing there shirtless and one girl said, "Man, you need a bra!", and all the other girls echoed "Yeah! Wow! You really do! etc." Being too sceard to talk to my mom about this, or even write her a note for heaven's sakes, I took matters into my own hands. I took a tank top from my drawer and cut off the bottom half. Then I took a length of elastic from my mom's sewing room and safety pinned that all around the bottom edge of the tank top. Well, that didn't work. So I tossed botched "bra" under my bed. Shortly after Mom was in there cleaning and guess what she found... Yeah. And she announced it to the family! Everyone got quite a chuckle over that. Geez, I should have just written her a note!
+ January 23, 2009 10:52 PM +
Clover on St. Helens Avenue
I felt exactly like this in 5th grade! I remember it very clearly. But I never would have written about it.
+ January 23, 2009 11:43 PM +
julse in my room eating Amber's (famous) kool aid pie
The whole bra thing stinks no matter how you approach it. whether you have to resort to begging or whether you have it forced on you like I did. I too was tricked into it,taken to a dept. store by 3 aunts and grandma. (mom was in a drug induced oblivion) and made to try on bras. it remains to this day one of the lowlights of my life. now I have two daughters and I just buy them sports bras which they seem to like. I never made a huge deal out of it.
+ January 24, 2009 10:37 AM +
Been there, in panda bear.
Oh god, this was me too. The worst thing was shaving though. By 7th grade I was literally the only girl in the grade who didn't shave her legs and EVERYONE felt the need to tell me about it. For god's sake, women, just let your girls shave and wear bras, it can't hurt them and it'll make them so much happier.
+ January 24, 2009 03:41 PM +
booge
God, I remember the feelings too. My mother was trying hard to not let me grow up too fast, but at the same time, she couldn't separate her own stuff of letting go. I get a sick feeling when I see twelve-year-old "tweens" dressed like Lolita hookers who've had a couple of beers on a pub crawl, and I can understand trying to keep your girls from wearing too much make up, etc., but you can accept that their bodies are fucking changing.

My first bra was a C cup when I was 13. The humiliation I suffered at school was awful. It didn't help that I was a nerd and an outsider. I still remember when we went to go get me a bra--my mother kept trying to put me in A cups, then Bs, then Cs, because she was in such denial of what my body actually was.

Thank god I get a chance to be aware of who and what my kids will be. Hope I actually am.
+ January 24, 2009 11:26 PM +
Lucia in rarely commentsville
My daughter is developing young, like I did, so I started getting her cute little sports bra type things around 3rd grade. She obviously needed them.

They have bras with Hannah Montanna, Strawberry Shortcake, SpongeBob! Not like you have to buy something sexy. Although that SpongeBob. . .

+ January 25, 2009 06:49 AM +
hahaha in hahaha
hahahaha!! Best. Find. Ever.
+ January 28, 2009 10:03 AM +
Ally in the real world
Doesn't anyone else find this really, really sad? The extent of the spelling and grammar problems (esp. leaving out 'am' in 'I am')imply a learning disability, and the whole scenario shows genuine fear of her mother, even though she knows she has no other option but to ask.
+ January 30, 2009 09:42 AM +
miss gredenko in a 34C
As with several other posters, this certainly brought back memories for me. Fourth grade, first one to wear a bra. Mortifying. Boys always peaking. Not knowing where to put my hand when I had to say the Pledge of Allegience! My daughter will not be near bra age for awhile, but I did take my niece (whose mom is not in the picture) bra shopping about a year and a half ago. She was so grateful that I offered and did not make a big deal of it.
+ February 25, 2009 11:51 AM +

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