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July 12, 2007 |
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A Love Unrequited
FOUND by Molly
in McKenzie Bridge, Oregon
Found in the mail at the Ranger Station where I work.
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Rabbit May 31, 2007 |
Believe That October 29, 2005 |
Alterations in... May 18, 2003 |
Hangman September 05, 2004 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
OMG-I'm kinda getting all sweaty just reading this...it's sweet AND sexy.
Reminds me of PostSecret too....
Great find.
Who needs Sex in the City when you have Love in the Wilderness?
I googled this place; it looks gorgeous. I am also charmed that the anonymous writer's sentence structure, grammar, and...wait for it...punctuation are quite good.
Wow. So I'm just going to say the cliche' girl thing now and get it over with. Can someone be writing about me like this for once?! This is sweet, sexy and even a little sad all rolled into one. Amazing find for sure.
So... who is going to be the one to call this creepy?
Me!
Do you people not see the penmanship? It honestly looks like a 4th grader's handwritting. Obviously this child copied one of the love letters she found in her mom's nightstand drawer, right next to the..erm, ahem, "personal massage device".
How cute, she thinks that's love.
This is pretty much the story in the song "Girl from Ipanema".
Ah...young lust.
That's just a tingle in your panties, sweetie.
I am pretty sure this was written by a man.
I used to recieve notes like this, likewise, from a guy who worked in a grocery store. They were even annonymous. Wonder if he moved to Oregon and is now stalking Molly?
Yes, I said it "stalking." I always found the notes creepy, and this one creeps me out, too!
Any guy who is worth your time will introduce himself to you, make his attraction known, and ask you out!!!
SALT would never do this!
This isn't Creepy. It's always really classy guys who bag groceries. Since when have you heard of old men or zit faced pock marked teens being creepy. I mean, who doesn't want to be in the naughty thoughts of someone who just locked the door to the basment apartment in their mom's house. "I'll be right up mom, I'm writing my girl friend a letter. Can't I get some privacy around here."
I love the girl from Ipanema!
"...I smile but she doesn't see..."
I think it was written by a man too. 4th grade penmanship = man cursive writing. and yeah, it is a little creepy. at least he's a grammatically correct stalker.
I worked at a grocery store and I received a note like this from a guy that worked at the place next door. It was the sweetest and most romantic thing I have ever gotten. We dated for a couple of months. I hope that this guy at least gets a shot.
The writer says "check things out for you at the grocery store." Therefore, working on the cash, not bagging the grocs. Forgive me for being all stereotypical, but that usually means girls. I think this is a youngish girl who's feeling those tingles for the first time and mistaking it for love.
It's only 8:17! I thought for sure I would get to make the creepy prediction, but dammit Monika, you beat me to it!! Also, I can't believe there's already debate about whether the author is male or female (my vote is definitely male, btw). We're getting started so early today!
Okay, so who's going to decide the writer is gay and then condescend to everyone for assuming the note is based on a heterosexual situation? Come on people, don't let me down!
This is better than the man at the grocery store who came over to bag my groceries and tried to feel me up. Jerk.
Lots of months come b4 July.
It didn't take May. I'll try June.
I assumed this was a guy, girls make prettier hearts than that... As for penmanship, most people these days have terrible hand-writing. I blame keyboards. As for the creepiness level, nah, just sad. He's a guy with low self-confidence, who over-compensates with his vocabulary. She's clearly way out of his league.
There are lots of wonderful people who don't have the outside package and are reminded of that daily. Society dictates who is worthy and who isn't by the outside..but not the heart and soul of someone. "Out of her league"???? What league???...because she has dyed hair and big boobs and makeup? Some of us are incredibly talented, smart, capable, and really good in bed...just don't dress the part every day. I get passed over because I wasn't born with the desire to put on makeup everyday and be phony...so I know just how this GUY feels..and besides...I've known alot of jerks who couldn't spell(not to mention ditzy "pretty" girls)...it is time plain, kind, intelligent people came forth..and kicked this societies' notion that "pretty" comes first. Look for women who are capable and loving..not shallow and expensive to maintain...
You work at a Ranger Station, Molly? You need to HOOK ME UP!
Plain Jane: because she has dyed hair and big boobs and makeup?
You're assuming that "Out-of-his-league" I was talking about looks. Clearly, all I've got to go on is his obnoxiously over-flowered vocabulary, which has nothing to do with looks. My opinion: Mr.Anonymous needs to get real and be more genuine, rather than using guilt and pity to win a stranger's affection. Self-confidence is sexy. (and by self-confidence, I don't mean boobs)
rawr. first hotmom and mona, now jen and jane. don't get all fangs and claws over this dippy note. you're all hot. back down.
Lucy: you're all hot
shucks, fanks :) Honestly though, they're fun-fur covered claws. Promise.
Carly is right; 4th grade penmanship = man handwriting. One of my guy friends wrote to me while he was out of town, and I swear it looked exactly like my brother used to write when he was in second grade. We even found papers to compare the two.
Guess I have watched too much of the news or too many "Serial Killer" profiles on A&E, but this is straight up BTK in training material.
Shit! Give it up hotmom. We know your hot (not),old and tired. You are so fucking vain.
Mmmmmmm...."young lust".....I miss that, but certainly NOT the "unrequited" part.
What great find. What a beautiful place too!
Plain Jane, i like to think that people pick out people in the same way that they pick out art. what one person thinks is ugly and can't appreciate, someone else thinks is beautiful and intriguing. i think if you want to kick any of society's notions, and show them how smart and capable you are, you should probably start by getting out of your room more often.
Special Sauce- OMG did you see the one where the guy has the numeric scale for serial killers and he profiled David Parker Ray, who in my opinion, might have been the creepiest freak ever?
Jen and Mickey...you make good points...but alot of times self-confidence just gets you friends...or "You remind me of my sister" responses. "Out of his league"..why do there have to be leagues anyway???
Sometimes being smart and capable makes others think you aren't lonely or need anyone...and can be confusing to others.
At least this poor guy wrote a note and spoke of his need rather than suffered in silence for the rest of his life. Unrequited love is familiar and rampant the most painful of kind of love.
Sorry..I meant Emaline...not Mickey...so much for smart and capable! :O
Awwww. Grocery clerk and federal employee romance. So cute.
"Shivering with passion..." Whoa! Somehow, to me, that doesn't sound like something a guy would say. It certainly took a lot of courage to write and deliver this note. It makes me smile that it's all in cursive, except for the "Anonymous" signature. Ususally I see notes printed, and the siggy in cursive. This made me smile. Good find!
I like how he (I think it's a he)was sure to say "check things out for you at the grocery store" instead of "check you out for the grocery store." He wanted to keep it classy and not make her think he's just lusting.
About the big boobs/dyejob/makeup league versus the intellectual/talented/artsy league...I just gotta weigh in here, no claws, just sayin'... SOMETIMES, the makeup and dyejob are a mask that lets the wearer feel more comfortable in the skin they were provided. The package is not the identity...it's just a shell that can house many things, including intellect, artistic qualities or talent.
I always say I wasn't born with "the package" but thank G*d I can draw, because I paint the package on every day!
Whether this is a guy, or a girl, someone who uses their vocabulary isn't trying to overcompensate for anything. There are many ways people overcompensate, this, I dont think, is one of them. It's only the poor schlubs who have no vocabulary who are intimidated by those who do.
I hate that someone thinking someone is out of their league must mean good looks, makeup, muscles or flat abs. A vocabulary bigger than the 7 words you can't say on television is something that would put someone out of someone else's league.
But hey, little leaguers have hit one out of the park before. Can't blame a guy/girl for trying.
And you rock on, Rex, vicariously standing up the lady in your life. (don't like your use of the c-word, but that's just my bourgeouisie sensitivities speaking, yet, sometimes there is no other word that fits.)
Yes Mickey B, I saw that Evil Scale show on A&E-I wonder what nubmer this freak will apsire to be.
whoa there, rex! for someone so "in love with words", you sure don't waste any energy on bothering to spell them correctly. here's a tip so you don't look like such an idiot while (albeit entertaining for the rest of us) trying to seem so word-wise:
sentEnce and grammAr
jen, on the other hand, knows how to spell.
jesus hotmom, you don't skip a beat do you? you are one conceited piece of work. i feel sorry for your husband and your children. you make me sick.
Why can't pretty girls be smart also? Why can't smart girls be pretty also?
Besides, I've seen some pretty skanky chicks with too much makeup and giant knockers and I bet they couldn't answer the spam question without googling it. While I've also met some really beautiful girls who were kickass smart and didn't need all the makeup or padding in the world. (my roommate in college totally fits the latter - I'm betting she finds a cure for cancer in 10 years, yet has only ever worn mascara).
Overall, can we not generalize so much? When did being pretty mean you couldn't be smart or vise versa?
Besides, I LOVE this note. I wish more people were forthcoming with their feelings - big words and all.
But... would the clerk still like the girl (assuming the clerk is a dude) if he knew her outside of the Safeway checkout line? Sometimes unrequited loves are more exciting than dull relationships...
that looks like my handwriting when i started to write in cursive in second grade...that's pretty disturbing.
I think this is a college kid working hard over his summer break, and now that he's got this crush, he wants her to know that he is an educated man rather than just some guy who bags groceries for a living. I hope Anonymous takes a chance and tells her how he feels. Maybe lust will have a chance to turn into more.
I am soooo glad I'm not the only one who is totally turned off by Hot Mom's conceited moniker!
And for the sake of the find of the day, I think it's sweet and probably totally harmless. I picture the checkout person slipping it into the customer's bag after ringing in his/her order.
HotMom, I've questions for you. Were you a not so hot mom at one time, like b4 you lost a bunch of your fatty weight? And after you lost all that weight, did you have some fabulous transformation, i.e. boob job? Tummy tuck? Because I can honestly say, I don't know alot of mothers, who are attractive, feel they have to prove to the world they're hot moms. It's called class. I can understand your vanity, if that's what happened.
In this site everyone is HOT, SEXY AND BEAUTIFUL. Yet, we don't need to remind ourselves on a daily basis.
Maria, I LOVE you in a completely platonic way.
Some days just knowing someone thinks of you in a special way gives you a little skip in your step. I love this find.
Honestly people, some days I am simply amazed at the vanity here.
Remember you can't judge a book by its cover!
I bet this was a first draft of a note. The kid had it in his/her mind and decided to write it down before they forgot it.
"Shivering with passion" sounds like something a lovesick teen would say. Seems a little too young for anyone older than high school. The spelling and grammar is impressive.
Floyd, in the modern age of informal textual conversation misspelling is the new dialect. You knew every word i used regardless of how i spelt it. getting hung up on that shit is squaresville.
please let's not get hotmom wound up again about how her name was given to her, (perhaps by her parents, who had the foresight to know she would be a mom first and hot as well.
ok, sorry, obviously despite my admonition about claws and fangs, mine are out as well. screw it, bag on hotmom all you want, its kind of fun.
hotmom, that "man at the grocery store who came over to bag [your] groceries and tried to feel [you] up" was actually looking for the frozen green beans you had stuffed into your bra in an attempt to smuggle out of the store. He probably let you off the hook out of sheer pity after getting a close-up look at your busted face.
I have had a couple of kids and I am a mother first and fat second. I mean really gelatinously fat. But guess what, I still get hit on by the gentleman... And guess what hotmom, I bet I get more action than you do. Feeling sexy is more of an aphrodesiac than looking sexy ever will be.
With your moniker, it seems as if you are out to point out the difference between you and the rest of the moms of the world. Is being "hot" the only thing "special about you?"
I think your conceit and daily affirmations of your hotness gets under everyone's skin, just like SALT's attitude does, but I believe SALT is joking, and you are not.
Everyone suffers. It would be great if we remembered not to create more suffering for one another here on FOUND. There's already enough grief to go around.
Has anyone ever seen our beloved commenters, Flargy and Rex Winsome, in the same room at the same time? I'm beginning to think they are two of the many personae that make up one amazing person. I have some suspicions about the rest of you too. :-)
Sleepless, I think that if we tried to put Flargy and Rex in a room together, we may create some sort of apocalyptic event. Kind of like the new JJ Abrams movie, which my fiance is convinced is "Voltron" while I think it's something way cooler.
Like it or not, there definitely are "leagues" to which most people don't belong, and deciding otherwise for yourself doesn't mean it will ever change.
I like the red-neck joke that goes,
"How do you know if a woman is out of your league?"
Answer:
"She bowls on a different night."
Seriously, in my experience leagues are determined in roughly this order:
1.) Looks.
2.) Money. (Although the way others perceive your looks definitely improves with your net worth).
3.) Profession.
4.) Smarts.
I wish I could say it was otherwise. What you can do is some intelligent values clarification so that you're not chasing after something you'll never get(or worse, you do and find out it didn't fulfill your dreams after all).
It took some therapy, but once I got over thinking I should be with a beautiful, brilliant professional woman, I found a keenly intelligent, caring and rock-steady woman who has grown more beautiful every year for the past 24, my best friend, my wife and the love of my life.
Some Old Guy - the last paragraph of your post was beautiful. I hope you tell her that, and often. I also hope you know how lucky you are.
Picture this: you're working for the Forest Service somewhere out the McKenzie east of Springfield (the Newark, NJ of the west), and your co-worker mentions that he/she thought the checker at the market in Blue River was acting kind of flirty. The next thing you know, this mash note magically appears in the mail.
Gee, I wonder who wrote it? I know federal employees are very, very busy, but....
internet people are so funny. they actually think they know each other and can pass judgement. bitches! assholes! hahaha
remember the days when there were 4 or 5 comments per find... and they were actually ABOUT the find?
Whiner. Your comment isn't about the find either.
I think this note was written by Cary Stayner to Joie Armstrong. Joking. Really.
Lighten up. If her name were "hotpockets," would it make any difference? Be kind.
Lily, seriously what is wrong with you? What the hell is "hotpockets"? Did you just get down playing hacky and pick up your bong? Be kind?? <<vomiting>>
HotMom is a disgusting, vain person and needs to be told so.
One: I didn't find it creepy.
Two: I felt it was a girl, but maybe because I identified so strongly with the message. I have definitely felt that way before.
Three: Is he/she hot or not, etc. Maybe the person he/she is "in love" with is unavailable for other reasons, like married or in a serious relationship. If he/she is the grocery store clerk, then they probably would have seen the object of their affection with a significant other if there is one. It may not be a lack of self confidence.
Four: I loved this note as soon as I read it, it was like reading one of my old journal entries.
sick in tired --
Here you go, girl. Knock yourself out:
http://foundmagazine.com/comments/402
You see? I'm pretty sure that "SurlyBitch in Prison" *is* "hotmom." Or maybe Flargy.
Midlife Crisis and Mickey B are probably the same person, and I think SALT writes responses to himself under at least two other names.
Mona Lisa and Rex are definitely two different people, however. It was getting pretty torrid there for awhile before Mona started talking about her husband and kids.
Turbo is an original in every way.
You're all quite special to me. I just don't know how many of you there are.
wow ever get off the beating path
HOT POCKETS® brand stuffed sandwiches
Something a mom might buy?
Every day I look forward to checking the daily find and reading all of your comments. I enjoy the comments back and forth and have wished that I could be a part of your banter. I haven't been on the site for a while because of a family tragedy and am slightly disgusted by what I have come back to.
I have one comment and one question.
I LOVE the find.
Don't you people have jobs?
All of these comments are hysterical. spelling, grammar, whatever. this ain't no formal writin class, y'all. regarding the find, perhaps I am the only one who doesn't think the vocabulary is THAT smashing? "unrequited" is probably the "biggest" word on it. What is impressive is not the vocabulary but the way regular words are put together in a descriptive and informative way. I think it's cute. I love how it's on a boater registration paper. It reminds me of those parking lot payment slips at a local national forest hot spot, and it makes me want to go up to the grove, write a note on the parking slip and put it in the slot sans the cash..then go somewhere else. I think this find is great, and I don't care about how hotmom sees herself!
oh and to sleepless in seattle, I found the way you've considered the personas of flargy, mona, rex, turbo, etc. to be insightful, cute, and funny. :)
http://www.minddisorders.com/Kau-Nu/Narcissistic-pe
I'm concerned about your family tragedy Sam. Take care of yourself.
Some of you have some real issues with insecurities. My comment related a recent experience, big deal. The comments from those of you who continue to comment on me are such a joke.
SALT, you want proof? Here's a couple of recent pics of myself:
www.roverradio.com/hotmom Then click on the pictures tab.
To "hot" mom: You are living proof that people think all it takes to be hot is (dyed) blonde hair and red lipstick.
Can't we all just get aaaackkkk, aaaaacccckkk, xxxx
xxxx
xx
x
x
Oh. My. God. Is that what "hot" looks like these days?!? I'm sad that I even looked and scarred for doing so. I guess that's what I get.
Wow...hotmom, you're *not* hot. Well, maybe to someone who likes the entire makeup counter on their face and all the bleach in the world on their head. You spent all that cashola making yourself look like a 14 year old prosti-tot and you couldn't fix that nose? Tsk tsk.
Also, actually relating to the FOUND: this note is so cute. I think it fell out of Napoleon Dynamite.
WELL, DESPITE HOW CREEPY, CUTE, OBNOXIOUS, ANNOYING, SEX-ORIENTED THIS LETTER IS...
FLARGY'S COMMENTS OWN EVERYONES :D
ALSO-- SALT IN THE SEA!
IF YOU ARE A WOMAN, YOU CAN'T BE "THE MAN"!
OF COURSE UNLESS YOU ARE A TRANSVESTITE THAT'S HIDING UNDER THOSE BEAUTIFUL CLOTHES YOU'RE WEARING, YOU COULD! LOLOL :]
HOT MOM IS HOT AND I WOULD MARRY HER.
Sometimes comments really add to the Find- when everyone's trying to guess where and how the Found Item came into being, what were they thinking, and all of that.. others times, though.. well somtimes the whole comment thing really detracts from what Foundmagazine is trying to do here.
Sam (in between a rock and a hardplace), I wholeheartedly concur- this bitchfest is disgusting and disappointing. How long do y'all think it'll be before they disable comments, because it seems to always devolve into this?
Hotmom reminds me of Amanda from the Saw movies. And I am afraid. Very afraid. She does not look hot to me. she looks vicious. And psycho. I was not about to register for a free account just to see any of her other choice pics. But the one I did see *shudder*
She got herself a bunch a hits with this though, didn't she??
Jane, what about stereotypical "hot" people with brains???? Yeah, they actually exist. Don't be so judgemental and jaded. Looks only get people so far, same goes for other characteristics. Most well adjusted people have more to offer than just being smart or pretty.
Sleepless, love your comments. You're very observant. Rex and I have decided to keep it platonic... I'm trying so hard to behave. lol.....
I don't think its right that other people impersonate SALT. He's not important enough to give that much thought to.
Sam, hope things are ok.
SALT is too damn funny to be replicated. don't try, people.
So Salt... you'd marry hotmom, but you wouldn't fuck her? Reminds me of that game, "Kill Fuck or Marry."
As for the find, I know if I got it I'd go straight to the grocery store to try to figure out who it was. THEN I'd decide whether it was cute or scary.
I've not yet looked at HotMom's pics, but I knew she was trailer trash.
Sleepless- I'm just me, I only have the one name, sorry! :) But out of curiosity, what made you think Midlife Crisis and I were the same person? Do we have similar writing styles or opinions or what?
Also, welcome back sam, sorry to hear about your family crisis.
And...um...wow. Did I miss the day where hotmom ran over someone's dog or what? There's so much animosity, I feel like I missed something, and I would love to be filled in on where it all came from!
"I'm so offended by your criticizing my calling myself hot that I'm going to direct you to real pictures of myself so that you have an image, possibly one that you online bullies can trace to my real-life identity, to pick on" ? yeah. sure.
love and peace guys. I think this note is almost painfully sweet. The bad handwriting just makes the writer seem imperfect, and very vulnerable. It just makes me want to be really kind to whoever wrote it, and protect them a little lol. fucked up hippy bullshit, but there it is.
For the sake of being on topic, this find is really cute and sweet. I think the writer added "all you know of me is that I occasionally check things out for you at the grocery store" just in case the recipient was intrigued enough to try and find out who sent the note. The writer probably hoped they would, and that the recipient would make the first move to talk to them.
That's probably what I would do if I were that shy.
Oh, Rex, Rex, Rex, I fear your shrink has misspelled your prescription slip. Only people who CAN write/speak/spell correctly should be able to butcher the language, for comedic effect. But the dummies/lazies who surround us are losing not only the art of language but the art of humor as well. And we as a society are the poorer for it. It's bad enough when NASA misspells "Endeavour". What's next? Stop signs spelled "SPOT"? As for the find: bittersweet. Brings back awkward memories. (Uh, Rex, that would be AUKWERD MEMORYZ)
Sam, thanks for putting us in our place. Great find, although somewhat creepy.
I love the "&" symbol. The second and third "I" are very prominent and sharp, which indicates a certain amount of self identity that the author is not willing to expose in the rest of the communique. The note reads as if it were written by a girl, but the heart is incomplete– which leads me to believe that what we have on our hands here is a sensitive young man who has seen one too many Hal Hartley movies.
Anonymous passion when expressed on scraps of paper and written with an eraser-less pencil is always creepy. Somehow, this Find is creepy in that baby crocodile way– you want to be afraid, but it's kinda cute too.
Ady, you are totally right about the baby crocodile anaolgy. Also, in the vauge uneasy sense it might grow up and rip your limbs off, but it's super cute while tearing apart a goldfish, this find creeps me out.
"Saddened", you're not funny.
self confidence only gets you so far when you're ugly and poor.
I have the attention span of a fly, so I couldn't read through all 900 comments, but did no one think to ask "Molly" if she's noticed any stalking activity? She's the one who works at the ranger station where this letter was put in the mail!!! Hmmmm?
This will end badly.
I hope she gained the courage to tell him as she scanned his coffee filters and BBQ sauce.
Holy shit. go to hotmom's profile, and read the guestbook. Scary. I think salt is hotmom is pepper.