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December 19, 2007 |
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Sebastian
FOUND by Rachel Svenson
in Geneseo dorm hallway, New York
My roommate and I found this taped to the glass window beside a doorway in our dorm hall on a Saturday morning. There must be an extremely interesting story behind it... perhaps shedding some light on the crashing and shouting we heard the night before. Even if he did keep us up, hopefully Sebastian will heed this note's advice in the future... for his own safety!
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Put Your Poo Hats... January 25, 2004 |
Awesome Party May 27, 2006 |
Someone Who Hates... August 11, 2005 |
Man and Mule March 02, 2003 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
» The BBC's Jamillah Knowles mixes it up with the FOUND crew after a show in London (starts 1/3 of the way through)!
» We're hopping on a plane and jetting to Europe for our Fall 2008 Euro Tour!
Dot your freaking i's!!!
Hey, they dotted ONE i. Maybe they only believe in dotting i's in proper nouns.
What is with boys and punching things when they are drunk anyways....Just last weekend I went over to my friend's house to find 4 highly intoxicated boys trying to use drywall mud to fill in a hole someone had punched......
I suppose Sebastian may have walked into the glass and then got angry and punched it? Who knows......
sebastian,
don't be an ass, 'kay.
p.s. what is LMFAO, by the way?
Look Mother, Fred's An Onion??
Listen Mister, Fuck Aunt Opal!
other suggestions?
Did you hear what happened to the man who walked into the screen door? He strained himself.
sarasara:
LMFAO means laugh my fucking ass off
and to repeat julia's question why are drunk guys always punching things? i know a guy who broke his hand because he punched a telephone pole drunk.
LMAO = laughing my ass off.
Maybe I should be putting post its around my house- don't punch the microwave! Don't punch the door.. don't punch the tv.. don't punch your cell phone! (I don't think it would work. Black sharpie on yellow post it is not an effective anger management tool.)
WORDS OF WISDOM WE ALL CAN LIVE BY!
is anyone else wondering . . . since the note was taken . . . if sebastian hurt himself?
Good one, Clover!!! TEE-HEE!!!
Holly got excited. I know multiple people that have broken their hands punching walls. I guess that's what you get going to ASU. I can definitely picture dorm roomies getting a laugh out of bringing up the joke from the previous might-- whether Sebastian remembers enough to be embarrassed or not.
I went to Geneseo (although many years ago)... I remember someone walking through a plate glass window and cutting their nose so bad it needed stitches. Maybe there is something in the water there.
Clover...loved it!
you spoke as if YOU were not excited yourself, surelybeth. And yes, I am SURE Sebastian has now injured himself.
I think I'll send this to my sister, she's naming her first born (due in two months) Sebastian.
Let's hope in 18 years he's not one of those drunk guys who runs into things in the dorm.
p.s. Clover, may I steal that fabulous joke of yours?
I got the hiccups. People who aren't drunk often punch things. In any event, I'd avoid Sebastian. And I'd dot my "i"s. I got the hiccups.
i know a kid who severed his brachial artery (that's in your arm) and nearly died, from putting his arm through a plate glass window.
sarasara
Let Me Fully Assess Orgasms
Lets all freak at oprah
blue in the bayou...you are freaking funny
Good handwriting!
Clever, Clover. Or can we just call you Clever Clover?
I was worried about Sebastian after the note was taken as well.
My grandmother put these little stickers on her glass doors so my grandfather would stop walking into them. It didn't help.
Perfect - I'm jealous. I would love to see someone punch a telphone pole until the pole was drunk.
I'm mad at Sebastian who being so stupid he has to be told not to punch glass. He's such a burden to have as a friend. I have to tell him " Sebastian, don't walk out in the road without looking. Sebastian, don't take the radio in the bathtub." It's always something.
For!
Hahaha! We lived in an apartment for a year when I was growing up. We'd always lived in a house with a big backyard that had a privacy fence so it was a bit of a transition for our dog. Every time someone would walk by that wasn't in the family my dog would spazz out and if the curtains were open that lead to the sliding glass door, but the door was closed she would run smack into it and then stumble off with this glazed expression on her face. Stupid dog. Heh Heh!
We have a huge picture window in my kitchen, and my (male) flat mates always try to go through it when drunk... They discovered a way to jimmy one section open for easy access to the porch when they want to smoke, but when drunk they don't know the difference between open and closed. We have a huge sign taped to it that reads "USE THE DOOR JOE/STEVEN/CHRISTIAN/ERIC/MICHAEL/IRISH!!"
Doesn't always work though... And yeah, when they find they can't just walk right on through, they do have a tendency to get punchy. My room is right above, and I can't count the number of times I've been awakened by a loud bang, followed by a barrage of curse words.
I also used to have a sign taped to my window reading "NO. GO AWAY." because one of the boys discovered how to climb onto the porch roof and used to demand to be let in at odd hours of the night. He went home to the States though...
I have to say that being a bit of a clumsy girl who doesn't watch where she is going, I have walked into glass/screen doors a couple of times. But I have never punched one. Although my brother did kick the screen door of our house in. But he was mad, not drunk.
Well, we are assuming he was drunk at the time. At least that is a partial excuse. My friends back in high school punched brick walls, trees, and glass windows for fun. Glad I was smart enough not to do that.
Like Mona, I knew someone who almost died after punching through a sliding glass door. Unlike all the rest of you, though, I don't feel sorry for/worry about Sebastian. Here's what I propose: If people are dumb enough to do these things, we should not cheat them out of their rightful Darwin Award. So punch away, I say! (OK - go ahead, bash me for being intolerant. I don't care.)
Bunny - slightly jealous that you have 6 guys living with you. At least one must be some eye candy, eh?
KC: Ohhh yes. (Since this is posted in anonymity I can say that ;-) Actually I had a fun experience this morning, wandering down to the kitchen and finding a flat mate in his towel. He thought I had gone home for the holiday.
Actually, feel bad saying this, but the only one who didn't have a degree of "candy" to him was the one who used to climb up to my window in the nude. *shudder* I always used to wonder why it had to be him...
I'm glad y'all love the screen door joke as much as I do. I first heard it about age 14 and it's my very favorite joke ever. In fact the same afternoon before this was posted, I had told it to a few of my high school students.
Usually when I tell it, most people giggle politely, which is not the same hilarious reaction it provokes in me. That's sad, because that joke is really really funny.
Perhaps there are people who have never used a strainer, walked into a screen door, or strained themselves.
Katey, I hope you have luck finding people who "get" that joke -- like our found friends! Fun and funny!
In my frat house in college, an idiot from another house kept getting drunk and punching a hole in our bathroom wall. The second time we repaired it, we put 2x4 studs behind the spot then patched the drywall. He broke his hand punching it the next week. Damn it feels good to be a gangsta.
Bunny did your flat mate become flat from running into doors and walls? I'm getting this mental picture of Gumby fresh out of the shower..
Clever Clover.... too funny... Gumby.... lol
Clover: I am never going to look at him the same way again. Heh! He is rather tall and thin, and his mouth did form a perfect "O" when I walked in... But he's not green. (Sadly.)
Flatmate, flat mate: Bloody spell check!
KC:
I totally agree.
Some days I think the gene pool needs more chlorine.
Although I resist the idea that drunkenness is a viable excuse for any sort of behaviour, I suppose it is marginally more acceptable than my brother's motivation for punching holes in walls, doors etc. in my mother's house. He was learning martial arts and had learned the stiff-fingered blow (whatever it's called) and proceeded to go home and punch holes in the unfinished plaster walls of his bedroom. When the novelty of that wore off, he put a couple of holes in his bedroom door. Funny that...they didn't self-heal. He spent a couple of years complaining that my father didn't repair the damage.
Adam was a rough draft. (and I bet only women "get" that one.)
Walking into Glass: Unintentional
Punching Glass: Intentional
So, I can understand accidentally walking into glass because it's so clean you can't tell it's there,...but to be tempted to punch it after being warned to not walk through it....
*clunk* "Ow! What the...? Oh I see how it is! Damn glass! Well I'll just show you a thing or two!" *CLUNK!* "That'll teach you to get in front of me when I'm walking!" *CLUNK! CLUNK!*
My ex's roommate once punched a hole in their bathroom wall because it "got in the way"...
Dear Sebastian,
If someone has to WARN you NOT to walk into glass, or to punch it.... I don't think a note will cover that much stupidity. So, Sebastian.... check yourself into a halfway house S.T.A.T. Remember to wear a helmet.
Doh!
They make brighter post-its for important notices like these. =X
The other thing that drunk men have a bad habit of doing is to pee in unsual places - like in the drawer or in the corner.
...or a pint glass on the kitchen table.
that was by far one of the worst kitchen finds EVER!
in college i once saw a guy punch through the safety glass (with diagonal wires running through it). he shredded his hand and to this day it was the grossest thing i've ever witnessed.
LOL! That is just funny that someone would need to have a note to refrain them from doing that. lol awesome.
Oh and Becky the image of your comment ugghh! I'm glad I didn't see that.
I used to have a bunny named Sebastian. I am now imagining him as a big drunk frat-boy bunny.
Bunny that is hilarious!!! LOL! Probably not at the time the guy was trying to climb through you window but still hilarious lol!
And Clover your flat comment almost made me fall out of my chair I was laughing so hard! I might need to stop reading the comments while at work :)
If I were Sebastian and I found this little "reminder" of my past or drunken stupid behavior, I'd be a little peeved. I mean really, who finds this amusing? It would be like a Post-it on the bathroom mirror with "Mona, don't fuck your ex tonight", or "Clover, remember to floss"...
Nadine, Ohh you aren't kidding. WHY!?! Men are so weird sometimes.
why is it that i'm fucking, and clover's flossing?
Utah: I sent him to the next window, which was inhabited by the manliest housemate of all.
The manliest housemate did quite a bit of shouting ;-)
Incidentally, one of the guys here is from Utah. He insists we pronounce it "Utar"...
Mona, I had that same thought?!?!? Unless Frank IS your husband?
The idea of putting up a post-it to remind yourself to floss is like the crazy, control freak boss I heard of recently who actually puts on her daily list of things to do 'wake up'. And then once she's up she actually crosses it off the list. Phew--task accomplished.
ummmmm nope, frank isnt my husband. if it were my brother frank, he'd use a more clever name, and the post wouldn't have been puncuated.
She heard crashing the night before? Wow they replaced the glass really fast!
Sebastian is being maligned. The note's writer is probably OCD and hyperconcerned about smudges on the windows.
Nadine, how about a friend your sharing a hotel room with pissing on your luggage? My boyfriend went on a trip to VA with a buddy of his, they went out drinking and went back to hotel. At 4am my bf woke up to the sound of someone peeing in front of him. His friend was still drunk and though he was in the bathroom. He was peeing on the bf's luggage, luckily for my bf he had taken his clothes for the next day out already.
Clover and Tori... You guys made my day.
More chlorine in the gene pool... I'll have to rememeber that one. :)
Clover was clever - but I need to give some props to Tori's "glazed expression" descrtiption.
I liked that too!
Mona, because "don't floss your ex tonight" doesn't make any sense?
Mona, based on your posts I assume you take excellent care of yourself, and the flossing would be understood. The fucking, on the other hand, is what makes you extremely mysterious.
aha.. i see... well, thank you, kind sir. i am touched by your lecherousness. (lecherosity?)
i am touched.
i think my ex could floss himself, nightingale. :-)
I know. That's why it wouldn't have made sense.
Personally, my ex can go fuck himself.
And be careful, Mona. I think Frank might be jail bait.
Bunny must be finally packing or something.
why is it that the inappropriate ones are always attracted to me? sigh
I can totally see Sebastian, as in Sebastian from 12th Night, punching glass.
Haha! Poor Mona. Frank you're a real charmer.
"Why do guys always punch things?" I don't know, but my boyfriend seems to have a massive capacity to get angry at inanimate things (the computer, the radio, the microwave, etc. etc) while being kindly-disposed to human beings. So maybe it's a good thing?
"Stupid glass. Take THAT! Hah! - why am I bleeding?"
Bunny (UEA! hooray!), sarasara, basil, becky -- hugs.
Spider, Clover, Tori -- tee hee + hug.
Mona, Nighty -- big hugs as always.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To visit his flat mate.
This note made me start singing "George, George, George of the Jungle strong as he can be... WATCH OUT FOR THAT TREE!!!"
:)
Sebastian, you a**hole, why would you walk into the glass?
As if a little sticky note will deter a raging drunk....
*sigh* At least someone tried....