September 20, 2007

Regretful Child's Apology
FOUND by J. Sanchez in Hatcher Pass, Alaska
Found this in a vacation rental cabin at a mountain lodge. I wonder who called the poor child a snot, and why it was so wrong for him to wonder such a thing???
Jan, an in solent little snot on occasion
How many children does Alec Baldwin have?
+ September 20, 2007 12:20 AM +
Sara in Oregon
I like how he crossed out "futture" and put "futcher"... he was closer the first time.
+ September 20, 2007 12:35 AM +
Adrian in Arcata
This is absolutely brilliant! I really want to know what lead up to the writing of this note!
+ September 20, 2007 01:01 AM +
Tucker in the shoe
monopoly always brings out the worst in my family
+ September 20, 2007 01:08 AM +
Sitting by the computer suufering from in somnia.
These parents shouldn't worry about their kid being such a snot... they should help their kid with spelling! Maybe if you paid more attention to your kid and helped him with his homework, he wouldn't BE such a snot. *geesh*
+ September 20, 2007 01:18 AM +
older sister in AZ
This reminds me of a note that my mom made my sister write to me when she was being a brat. However, this one is much better.
+ September 20, 2007 01:21 AM +
tash in old kent road
ah monopoly... cause of soo many fights. i used to steal all the $500 notes from the bank when noone was looking. not exactly subtle cos the bank never runs out of $500 notes!!
+ September 20, 2007 01:52 AM +
Gigi in that old Paris cafe again
I think writing a note is a great idea for a misbehaving child. If this one did it on their own - even better.

I see so many children who are snots about eating and food....as for the rest of the note - I don't see the problem.
I think it's great when kids ask about things and 'what would happen if...?'
Great find.
+ September 20, 2007 02:06 AM +
? in your dreams
his parents should be happy that he wonders what would happen if he shot a policeman, that very question might keep him out of jail (not only on the monopoly board)
+ September 20, 2007 02:08 AM +
bolddeciever in the sky with diamonds
It depends a lot on how it's asked. I can think of contexts in which asking that would be highly inappropriate.
+ September 20, 2007 04:30 AM +
mona lisa in the louvre
I love this find. Yeah, the kid shouldn't have been a snot, but i think asking the question was ok. Although, at first, i thought it meant a Polish man, which, of course is different, than a policeman. Or it could be the same.
+ September 20, 2007 05:28 AM +
not here in not know
fake find
+ September 20, 2007 05:40 AM +
why not here in why not ... know? or now
why would someone send in a fake find? that makes no sense at all. There are so many things to find. I don't think its fake.
+ September 20, 2007 05:45 AM +
j. sanchez in alaska
I can assure you this is not fake. A housekeeper found this note in a guest cabin. There are no t.v.s, just games and books. She passed it on to me and I just read it to a friend because it was so funny. My friend is the one who told me to send it in to this website. I had not even heard of Found before! I mailed this in over a year ago, so it's great to see it made find of the day!!!
+ September 20, 2007 07:01 AM +
Do Not Pass Go in Gainesville, FL
Ahhhhhh playing games with the famn damily. My brother, father and I actually were banned from playing spades with one another because we would fight so badly.

Hahahahahaha. Good times. Good times.

And for the kid - if you shot a cop you would probably be in a lot of trouble. But whatever you do, scream "Don't tase be bro!"
+ September 20, 2007 07:17 AM +
Do Not Pass Grammar.... in Gainesville, FL
Pardon me. "Don't tase ME bro..."

Oops.
+ September 20, 2007 07:18 AM +
kate in placing notes on my "how to drive mt third grader nuts" list
This is completely a parent required note. No kid would ever come up with this on his/her own. I can just picture it... Sitting at the dining room table, writing this note, muttering "its all Kaylas fault" while the rest of the family continues the game of monopoly nearby.
+ September 20, 2007 07:24 AM +
Elizabeth in Philadelphia
I think her name is 'Kasha', which is a Polish, girl's nickname. If they are Polish, that would explain the spelling and lack of articles (totally an Eastern European thing to do- leave out the articles).
+ September 20, 2007 07:36 AM +
Cab in Fever
It was definitely time for vacation to END. Cabin Fever had set in. No matter how scenic the surroundings, kids don't do well in a cabin with only books, boardgames, and each other for entertainment.
+ September 20, 2007 07:37 AM +
Pixi in Amherst, MA
Classic. I bet the kid threw the Monopoly board over too, and all the little houses and hotels went everywhere. What a snot.

I'm curious regarding the being disrespectful about eating part though...

I see this kid, in the futcher, on the psychiatrist's couch recounting horrible family vacations to the mountains, and being scarred for life by the events we read about here...
+ September 20, 2007 07:46 AM +
mel in canadaland
Disrespectful about eating = exclamations of "Ewwwww, gross! I don't like that!" as the food they've never tried before is brought to the table.
+ September 20, 2007 07:51 AM +
plastic in casual
mona i love that you first read it as 'polish' - i'm not sure which is a funnier adaptation. either way, i hope the parents explained that he probably should just stick with not running around shooting anybody.
+ September 20, 2007 07:58 AM +
teetering in platform shoes
The kid was just curious about the cop thing.I hope someone answered the question.
+ September 20, 2007 08:01 AM +
metta in tranced
is that a policeman or a polish man?
+ September 20, 2007 08:04 AM +
Al Simon in cognito
Metta, apparently you're not allowed to shoot either one. That's what i'm taking from all of the comments, anyway. Even if eastern europeans don't spell very well, and don't use articles.
+ September 20, 2007 08:14 AM +
Marie in C-ville, VA
Sullen teenager, I'll bet. Forced to spend time with the family even tho he/she (at this phase in life) hates them and thinks they are stupid and naive. Balks at eating with, and playing games with said family.

And bolddeceiver, you are right! It could have been an innocent question, but based on the note, it was probably said in the context of being a snot, and it would have sounded more like a (likely empty of course) threat.

But great that they wrote the note, even if made to, and that they used the word snot, b/c they probably came up with it.
+ September 20, 2007 08:18 AM +
Turbo in the Thunderdome
When I saw the word "futcher", I immediatly put together "Fucking Ashton Kutcher", who I might shoot, if he were Polish.
+ September 20, 2007 08:19 AM +
Fun in Dysfunction
Love the find! My mother would never have her disrespectful, crude eating, game playing, question asking brood write a apologetic note. She would have just beaten the good attitude into us. This was the 60's when that was still acceptable! Maybe that's why we never played board games..... We just made up our own fun out of earshot! Usually rude, crude and with a bad attitude. Maybe thats why my family is so dysfunctional but oh so much fun!
+ September 20, 2007 08:24 AM +
Cotton in Dixieland
I wish you could tell what was marked out and replaced by "snot"...

Maybe it was finally time to go do something the kid considered fun on vacation, and he was trying to get back in the good graces of his parents!

Why are vacations with kids so stressful for EVERYONE?
+ September 20, 2007 08:34 AM +
Beth in a tizzy
My Mother used to make us write these appology notes to each other after we did anything. I am very curious what he/she did in playing Monopoly that was so disrespectful? I'll hazard a guess it was raining outside that day.
+ September 20, 2007 08:34 AM +
baby basil in the herb garden
This brings back memories...not good ones! The good old forced apology note, which just forces Junior to be a hypocrite, and reinforces his anger and resentment, as he is made to detail "offenses" that he doesn't acknowledge to be such, and assume false guilt. Sounds like his parents belong to the same weirdo cult I was raised in...
+ September 20, 2007 08:36 AM +
joe in idaho
baby basil where you really raised in a cult???
+ September 20, 2007 08:40 AM +
Jill in Boston
I have a feeling this kid is now 23 and sitting in jail on gun-related charges. Just hazarding a guess on what his future held.
+ September 20, 2007 08:42 AM +
Courtney in Mi
Jan - You're Great.

I would be disrespectful to anyone that made me play monopoly - what a dreadful never-ending game.

P.S. Mom and Dad - thanks for the vacation in Alaska. I've really enjoyed the scenery from this mountain lodge - this is WAYYY better that going to Cedar Pointe like I wanted to do. Can we go home now?
+ September 20, 2007 08:47 AM +
Alice in VA
I actually feel really bad for the kid who had to write this. I don't know why, it just seems so... unjust! If this were my child, I would have told him that if he didn't like the food, he didn't have to eat it. If he couldn't play monopoly without throwing a fit, then he just can't play monopoly. I would have answered his policeman question. And then I would have sent him to bed! The poor baby is all tired out and that's why he's got a bad attitude.
+ September 20, 2007 08:48 AM +
Top Hat in is better than the old shoe
Classic Quality Family Time. Kid is a sore loser, cheated and messed the board up ruining the game for everyone. Says all the food is gross,wants McD's. Whine, Whine Whine. Mom ready to slap the little snot. Been there as the kid and now as the Mom.

+ September 20, 2007 08:51 AM +
Top Hat in is better than the old shoe
Alice in VA, just guesssing you're not a parent? right?
+ September 20, 2007 08:53 AM +
Mickey B in hell for only TWO MORE DAYS!!
hahaha Jan, you crack me up- I look forward to your comments every single day! :)

"and asking what would happen if you shot a polieseman" hahaha one of the best quotes from a find ever.
+ September 20, 2007 08:54 AM +
Michelle in a time out corner
i used to have to write those all the time...oh how it pissed me off. and i definitely would throw a tantrum if they tried to make me eat something that i didn't want to.
+ September 20, 2007 09:14 AM +
Curious in Charlotte, NC
I *am* a parent, and I agree with Alice. I've raised my kids with no punishments, no belittling their feelings - and they're compassionate, happy, respectful people. They've been treated the way I want them to treat others, and the way I want to be treated - it's pretty simple. I feel bad for the kid, too.
+ September 20, 2007 09:26 AM +
hole in the wall
i want to marry this boy.
+ September 20, 2007 09:27 AM +
Unworthy in a short, pleated skirt
Funny Find, J. Sanchez! From now on I'm going to pronounce "future" as if it rhymes with "butcher".

"You have a bright futcher ahead of you, Son."

(please please please let's not let this turn into a parenting style discussion) ty xo
+ September 20, 2007 09:42 AM +
Top Hat in better than old shoe
I think you're all f**ked in the head. We're ten hours from the f**king fun park and you want to bail out? Well I'll tell you something. This is no longer a vacation. It's a quest. It's a quest for fun. I'm gonna have fun and you're gonna have fun. We're all gonna have so much f**king fun we'll need plastic surgery to remove our goddamn smiles! You'll be whistling 'Zip-A-Dee Doo-Dah' out of you're a**holes! I gotta be crazy! I'm on a pilgrimage to see a moose. Praise Marty Moose! Holy S**t!
-- Clark W. Griswold

+ September 20, 2007 09:48 AM +
poor police man putt in g a bullet proof vest on
Lets forget about the grammer for a second...why is this kid a cop killer?
+ September 20, 2007 10:07 AM +
Curious in Charlotte, NC
Sorry, Unworthy! (blush) Just got back from an unschooling conference, so I'm wanting to advocate a bit more than usual... I'll stop now.
+ September 20, 2007 10:18 AM +
SuzyQ in her black judge's robe
I blame the parents. It's seems like the thing to do.

My parents beat manners into us, and we are all ten of us fabulous people, but they would NEVER call us a "snot", make us write a fake apology, or deny answering us a question which needed a serious answer, no matter what our attitude in asking it was.

Here's my thought: The poor kid (like me) hates food that has been cooked outside and on top of that, dad burned dinner. The kid pointed that out while his rotten sister pretended the food she was spitting into her napkin was delicious and the mom was keeping her mouth shut because she was already pissed at dad.

After dinner, the "perfect" sister insisted on playing Monopoly, even though everyone was already tired and in a bad mood and no one wanted to play, but she whined until the parents gave in and if they have to play, so does the kid. So there they are, playing Monopoly everyone is annoyed because someone else took their favorite piece and this kid sees his sister stealing money from the bank and not counting her spaces right, just to make sure she gets the best properties. He finally calls her out on it, and arguement insues and he is the one the parents ultimately scream at, because they are already mad at him about dinner. He gets sent away to go write a note and to think about what he has done.

As he is thinking about it, he is wishing death on his little sister. In his fantasy, the cops are after her for being a snot and she is evading them. Then, out of nowhere, she pulls a gun on the cops and... "Mom, what would happen if you shot a policeman?"

You know I'm right.
+ September 20, 2007 10:34 AM +
D in the back back seat of the station wagon, sweating my @$$ off, driving to the Grand Canyon
We never fought while playing Monopoly...it was Risk that we were forbidden to play due to the arguments it generated. And now in my own family, it's Hearts that are forbidden, mostly because my youngest daughter is so damn good at that game and she trash talks the entire time.
+ September 20, 2007 10:40 AM +
baby basil in the herb garden
Yes, Joe, I was. Really. Took me many years to get over it, too. The only thing I really learned from them was how NOT to raise your children.
+ September 20, 2007 11:01 AM +
bruised in the U.P.
Slap Jack was banned in our family. We would have purple bruises on the tops of our hands before we finished with a free for all, head lock, knock down fight. Dang, I actually miss those days....
+ September 20, 2007 11:03 AM +
Norma Jean in the office
What would happen if you shot a polieseman? Too funny. Great find.
+ September 20, 2007 11:09 AM +
irina
He probably had to apologize in order to be able to have ice cream after supper or something. It's not cruel, in fact, it helps kids to recognize that they have crossed a boundary or done something inappropriate if they are asked to articulate it.

If the apology was fake, then I feel bad for the kid and his family. The whole idea is to have the child take responsibiity for his actions.

I am a mother of five and do not believe in spanking or yelling my head off at a child when he or she needs to correction.

Writing an apology note is a way better method.
+ September 20, 2007 11:15 AM +
bongos in my head
the poor boy got caught eating the monopoly game and then trying to play it! he kept landing on "go to jail", (as i always do) had no money to get out and wondered what it would be like to shoot a policeman (to get out) because security at monopoly jail sucks!!
+ September 20, 2007 11:15 AM +
mona lisa in the louvre
Unworthy, is this what kind of child you and SALT would have had? Maybe that's why he won't mate with you...
+ September 20, 2007 12:21 PM +
joe in in idaho
baby basil i'm sorry to hear that.
+ September 20, 2007 12:23 PM +
Screwed in the head by a domineering mother
SuzyQ, you got it right except one thing. I LOVE Dad's cooking on the grill. He never burns it. What I hated was the damn creamed peas that Mom insisted we have because my stupid sister liked them. They were in cahoots, I just know it. But they got theirs. Eventually.
+ September 20, 2007 12:42 PM +
Unworthy
No, Mona, I'm Unworthy on so many other levels, childrearing isn't even an issue. (Times 10.)

Go read your bulletin board. I gotta go. Be back later.
+ September 20, 2007 12:48 PM +
Understanding in herb garden with baby basil
I know what you're talking about baby basil. It doesn't seem like a cult until you're in the real world and you realize what hypocritical liars your family members were. And it's even worse when you begin to deal with it and none of them will even acknowledge it and they "just don't understand why you are so angry!"
+ September 20, 2007 12:52 PM +
the shooters in the hall
We know what happens when you shoot a policeman. Blood splatters out of the gushing wound in his face, just like it does when you shoot your sister.
+ September 20, 2007 01:23 PM +
Rex in MKE
Somehow i read this as being written by a little girl, and felt sympathetic immediately, especially where she's thinking about shooting cops. Awww... it's the futcher's Kathy Boudin.
+ September 20, 2007 01:27 PM +
Blow N in the wind
Sounds like my kinda kid!
Way to spoil a good time Kayla!
+ September 20, 2007 02:14 PM +
Laurie in NY
What would happen if you shot a policeman??? LOL LOL How old is this kid, b/c judging by his /her handwriting, not very old. Ah, the wonders of the minds of kids.
+ September 20, 2007 02:18 PM +
Jeff Buckley in reality
Anne Kuhns needs to calm down. She should listen to some songs. Some real songs. Gosh. Maybe the algea has gotten to her.

I've got some songs. So real.
+ September 20, 2007 02:27 PM +
Alai in deep space
Clearly this was written under coercion.
+ September 20, 2007 03:37 PM +
sparky in timbuktu
I shot the sheriff, but I did not shoot the deputy...
+ September 20, 2007 03:38 PM +
Beth in a tizzy
I feel true kinship with this child, as I had to write many such notes under coersion.

However, I think this kid will be fine, despite everyone's dire predictions. He's mad today (probably tired and bored) but tomorrow he'll be back to playing Monopoly happily with Kayla. I grew up fine and so will he :-P

And just he way this is written makes me think that it's a boy. I don't know why.
+ September 20, 2007 04:27 PM +
the in dependent
I fought my mom,and my mom won.
+ September 20, 2007 04:39 PM +
Herve in shoes and a hat
For sure, this is a boy.
+ September 20, 2007 04:53 PM +
Alai in deep space
Turbo, I look forward to your comments every day! Rock on.

Beth, I thought the same thing - it has to be a boy.
+ September 20, 2007 05:32 PM +
Jamie in da house.
this is the cutest apology in the world.. if this was my child i would be in tears.
+ September 20, 2007 05:32 PM +
Hand in The Backgammon Board
My mom once slammed my hand in the backgammon board because I had beat her for the umpteenth time. I was in grade school. No, she wasn't typically abusive. Still cracks me up to this day.
+ September 20, 2007 05:56 PM +
Stuch in the middle with you
To this day my brother and I are not allowed to play Monopoly together. Every few years we give it another go, and every few years I remember why I hated him so much growing up... every game ends in tears.
Right now I'm picturing him as a policeman... which is also what I imagine Kayla wanted to be when she grew up. How can one not wonder what it would be like to shoot a policeman in a sercumstance like that.
+ September 20, 2007 06:35 PM +
Blow N in the wind
you are all my friends here so I am going to share a little something about myself


When i was just a lil'dylan fan, I was not allowed to play with dice. Something about the roman soldiers casting lots to win Jesus' clothes. When we played Monolopy or Sorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry, we useD the BIBLE, SO, if it was my turn, i'd hold the book between my palms and then open to a random section. Not looking, i'd point to a spot in the BIBLE and open my eyes and then read the verse I'd point to.
We (my sibs and i) learned our bible verses and ecomonics............i often wonder "they shoot policemen don't they?

now brush your teeth and go to bed.
+ September 20, 2007 06:49 PM +
tyler
im a kid so i fell bad for him its not cool for parents to do that!!@@##$$%%^^&&
+ September 20, 2007 07:58 PM +
Pixi in Amherst, MA
lil'dylan fan, how did the BIBLE tell you how far to move your little hat or rocking horse on the Monopoly Board, or did God speak to you directly with the numbers he wanted you to advance? I'm guessing it has something to do with verse numbers?
+ September 20, 2007 08:00 PM +
Blow N in the wind
oops! forgot to add that part.....the verse number was how many spaces to move.
+ September 20, 2007 08:55 PM +
Elliot in IL
Monopoly just rips families apart...
+ September 20, 2007 09:45 PM +
blow n in the wind
http://www.dylanmessaging.com/messages/3DRZ-DCN7-4J
+ September 20, 2007 10:59 PM +
baby basil in the herb garden
Thanks, Joe and Understanding. You make my day. True, since I got away from the dysfunctional system, I no longer have a family...they won't speak to me. And life is very free. The anger was useful; I had something to fight with. And they are so far in denial they might as well be Egyptian. But I am happy now, and they will never be. Guess who won THAT particular game of "Monopoly"?
+ September 21, 2007 02:47 AM +
fakity fake fake fake in fakesville
totoally and completely fake
+ September 21, 2007 10:47 AM +
Cat rancher in Sunny Southwest
This find points out just how torturous family vacations can be. Traveling to Alaska, playing board games, eating strange food, trapped with your family for days on end. That's the fourth level of hell right there. The poor kid was born into the wrong fan-damily. Hopefully, he survives this up-bringing and WON'T perpetuate the same behaviors onto the next generation. And using the Bible to tell you how many spaces to move on a board game?? That's just wrong.
+ September 21, 2007 03:34 PM +
Jonathan in The Old Testament
Hi there, Blow N, I wonder if you ever opened the Bible at Isaiah chapter 36 verse 12? Or even ‘accidentally on purpose’ maybe, tee hee.
(I don’t think this Find is fake or even fakity fake at all??)
Next time I have to apologise for being a snot I must remember to say ‘In the futcher I will have a better attude’. Priceless!
Seriously, I’m sorry some of you guys had a tough childhood. Well, you made it in the end and here we all are!! Happy ending. Now brush your teeth and go to bed like the nice man says.
PS -- loved the video.
+ September 22, 2007 03:09 PM +
fuzzymuzzy in chicago
that poor kid, i guilt tripped my parents with these notes when I was younger, still have them too
+ September 23, 2007 11:47 AM +
Turbo Fan
Turbo: gerund or participle (i.e., Demi Moore or the rest of us)?
+ September 27, 2007 11:04 PM +
Holly Golightly in Tiffany's
I wonder if there's a Trusty Translator for Turbo's Fans?
+ September 27, 2007 11:26 PM +
Turbo Fan
"Fucking Ashton Kutcher" can be taken two ways, depending on whether "fucking" is used as a verb or an adjective. Don't worry, though. I had to look up the difference between a gerund and a participle before posting, and I'm still not sure I got it right. Hahahahahaha! So much for trying to be clever.
+ October 05, 2007 05:12 PM +
Holly Golightly in T
Oh...I get it. Finally. (God I'm so dense...duh.)
+ October 05, 2007 06:37 PM +
ilovemygeek in London
I think it's important that the child finds out what would happen if they shot a 'poliese man' (at first I thought it was supposed to say polish man).
Our children must learn these things, not be punnished!
+ March 20, 2008 07:47 AM +

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