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January 13, 2008 |
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Teacher, Librarian
FOUND by Kyle R. Kipp
in Ypsilanti, Michigan
I found this at Lincoln High School in an English classroom. It was probably written by a group of kids in response to an "Animal Farm" (by Orwell) assignment. I thought it was kinda funny. I teach at Lincoln High School and find funny stuff all time; I should really send more of it in.
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
Okay, no sleeping with teachers. Does that mean the custodian is fair game?
I was actually just having a conversation with someone right when i was reading this about how i am going to be a teacher in a year and a half and how i must remember not to have sex in the classroom. :)
Animal Farm... Good God. My teacher played the movie version for us at the end of that unit and I will be scarred for life. The animatronic animals were both laughably horrible and terrifying at the same time. If I never see that again, it'll be too soon.
Two things in particular that strike me as funny: I love how he titles it "THE seven commandments," which I read as "thee,". I also love how the first six could be for a kid headed to juvie, but the last one seems like he ran out of ideas. Great find.
Jeeze. When we did Animal Farm in October all we got to do was write an essay about it.
I could have written WAY better commandments.
Whoops. Sorry for the jumbled punctuation. Still shaky from the thought of that film. :)
Psh. I WISH you only had to be 18 to drink.
The last commandment was in I-give-up-and-can't-think-of-any-more-commandments handwriting.
I wonder what the teacher thought when they saw the "no sleeping with teachers" commandment. I'd be freaked out.
can we still boink our teachers, as long as we don't fall asleep?
I wonder how many 8 hour shifts of the daily grind before he crosses off "at least"?
OK, no smoking or drinking till your of age, no sleeping with teachers (no matter what age)--but no mention of safe sex or abstinence re:everyone else.
I sense a single parent in the making...
No Jan, custodians are off limits, but not the lunch room lady with the hair net.
We had a smoking section when I was I high school. That blows my kids minds.
That 1st commandment seems more like a goal than a commandment, though I suppose if a high-school kid wrote it s/he has probably heard it laid down as law so often it probably feels like a commandment.
Hey, Student in hell, so did we. Kinda crazy, eh?
i love these commandments. Some people i went to school with didn't follow #5. good times, good times.
Hey! Wait a second..if I just helped the teachers break in a few desks and didn't actually SLEEP am I still okay in the commandments or will I be smote down?
Hey hey hey, don't slag off the importance of composting and recycling here, people! Learning to respect the world you live in starts with the little things...and respecting the planet can teach you to have more respect for people and other animals. One person at a time, we can stop the destruction. Learning not to toss your trash willy-nilly carries an implicit lesson on respecting property and boundaries.
We had a smoking section at my high school too.
I think these are some pretty good commandments.
What kind of school is this that you CAN'T sleep with your teachers? Kinda makes me not want to be a teacher.
Here is a young person trying to better themselves. Not only are they going to give up their theiving/drinking/smoking/ philandering ways, but they are going to recycle and not litter.
The comment about not sleeping with teachers made me laugh and laugh... when I was in high school, all the teachers were 50 or over *shudder*
This list seems very symbolic of the seven deadly sins if you analyse it. LOL !I was trying to figure out the significance of 7. Yes, yes, we had a smoking section in JOUNIOR HIGH school, by the way. It even had a name - it was called The Pit. Oh well, it was the 70s.
When I read Animal Farm my senior year, one of our assignments was to listen to Won't Get Fooled Again by The Who. My english teacher was awesome. Go read the lyrics and you'll understand, if you've read the book.
eww animal farm!!!! bad memories of freshman english, socratic seminars and the like... :)
i slept with a few teachers in highschool. now, with distance, none of them were very good.
and what the hell did they see in a kid???/ i look at my students and shudder at the thought. such an abuse.
Dammit! I'm a teacher, and I haven't gotten laid in AGES. Now I see why, all these willy nilly commandments being decreed! Note: this doesn't mean that EVERYONE can't sleep with teachers, just students!
Our smoking section was called " The Wall ".
I recently wrote my high school kid a list of commandments. Graduate with good grades, be good to people, shower regularly, work, don't get in trouble with the law, etc.. Maybe I should have mentioned not sleeping with teachers.
So they don't have outdoor smoking sections in high schools anymore?? I seriously didn't know that! I graduated in 1980, and we had one then...I didn't smoke, so didn't use it. Besides, those were the "stoners".
Well, according to this.......I'm going to high school hell.
yuck! yuck! yuck!! When I think about the teachers I had in high school, I shudder. To think about sleeping with them makes me want to run away screaming. YUCK YUCK YUCK!!!
Oh, and we had a smoking section in our high school, too, but I had totally forgotten about it until I read today's comments. That sounds crazy to me, now.
seems like it was a group project, and the cool/scandalous kids jumped on it, easily coming up with several oft-broken commandments. they needed a 7th, and the shy quiet girl who actually wanted to take it seriously (but was secretly amused and envious of the kids even Thinking of sleeping with teachers) was asked to contribute. she thought of the most crazy immoral thing She'd done recently, and offered the commandment of recycling . . . that dr. pepper can that now sits among banana peels and gum wrappers still haunting her.
We had a smoking section, too. We called it, 'The Rock'. There was a huge boulder that we could sit on...amazing times. I loved high school!
But NOT the teachers!
yeah...the pit, or the 'grit pit'. that was where all of the drug dealing went on, too. and if you were discreet enough you could round the corner and spark up a doobie. toward my senior year, they started cracking down; implemented 'narcs', and you could only smoke before and after school and only if you were an upperclassman and had parent's permission, or you would get the dreaded 'Saturday school'. Before that they just gave you the highly anticipated three-day suspension....oh, the good old days!
News flash: I'm in high school now, and there's still a smoking area. Sure, it's not strictly allowed, but it's inevitable. I think ours is called The Pit, too.
Good find, Kyle. Please send in more!
Theres a smoking section in my high school. Its called The Bathrooms. I guess its not so much a "section" as it is the place where you are the least likely to get caught...which is pretty sad, considering teachers use the same bathrooms. Teachers notice NOTHING. And if they do, which I'm sure they probably do, they do NOTHING about it. I remember a couple weeks ago these boys were bullying another kid in my science class and the teacher was more interested in the fact that the kid was out of his assigned seat than she was in the fact that he was being socially and mentally tortured.
ok, obviously you can't take a hint OR be original, but I've been using the name Villin for much longer than you've been using Villain. Why don't you try something else that nobody's using? From : Villin/ Tang/ Nikki
Or people might thing my spelling, punctuation, capitalization, and run on sentence skills are slipping again.
Dear Original Vill in, I posted as Villi, as in villi fualaau. (as in mary kay letourneau, in washington state.)
Just so you know I'm not using your name in vain.
with Love, the Captain.
Most of my high school teachers have been in their 20's or early 30's. My AP chem teacher my sophomore year was 23, and my AP calc teacher was something like 26... The last time I had a teacher over 40 was probably junior high, which is kind of ironic. Stick the older kids with the hot teachers. Great planning.
It's hard to get young people to go into teaching these days because of all the additional education (professional certification, masters degree, etc) that is required for such little pay and so many years in college. I've been a teacher for many years and love the profession, but I wouldn't encourage my daughters to go into it due to all the hoops you have to jump thru now to become a teacher.
Dear Captain, thank you for the explanation. I see how Villi applies to today's find, the not sleeping with teachers and all. Not sure how it applies to other days, but that's a good enough explanation for me. I like the name ( among others ) because I say what I think and that usually makes me the bad guy. Even when I have good intentions.
The Captain has never before used villi or villa or anything close. This was a one time thing, based on the Find- Whoever else is or has been using Villa or anything similar.. it's not me. Just so you know. someone *else* has some 'splainin' to do.
Oh, And in my highschool there was a "smoking section" too- it was the parking lot across the street, and it was called either The Smoker Lot or The Stoner Lot, depending on who was over there at the time.
yo villin. sorry if there was a misunderstanding. i never connected villa with villain. ha! pretty inadvertently clever though, huh?
i was thinking along the lines of a spanish villa. as in veeya.
so, um, no one is trying to steal your name. no stealing is commandment #6, after all.
Thanks to you too, then. Which reminds me of Pippi Longstocking's pad, Villa Villekula. Or whatever!
Hey Found guys, I think this would be a good t-shirt. What say?
I really think they should stop sticking just graduated teachers w/kids over 12, there is just too small of an age diff. sometimes and things happen. I know a chick who is going to be a teacher, and I gotta tell ya....she looks, dresses and acts like a HO (oh yeah, and she is one, too). I would never want a child to be taught by her. She'd corrupt the girls and seduce the boys! No lie.
And we had a smoking section at my school, too...by the gym, ironically enough.
High schools are a veritable treasure trove of found items. This has been said before, but I repeat it because it is a universal truth.
What I want to know is, why do some teacher/student affairs get reported (and the teachers prosecuted) and SO MANY don't? I've heard a lot of people tell about such experiences (from ex-student perspective). Of course no teacher would admit it.
Does the fact that this person's handwriting looks like a third-grader's alarm anyone?
At my high school, the student parking lot is on the side of the school next to the music wing. All the seniors smoke over there. A couple days ago, I witnessed a preppy senior girl proudly professing for all who would listen that she had quit smoking since 4 days before. Cigarettes are evil and disgusting and they make me want to puke. No offense to any smokers in the room, but hey- it helped kill both my paternal grandparents, so obviously I'm passionate.
By the way, any middle or high schoolers out there- have you noticed that health class is basically just DDD class? (Don't Do Drugs Class)
Ha, did anyone catch commandment 3: everybody MOST work ? seems a bit counterproductive to me.
This paper looks really old.
This kid's never gonna have any fun.
We had a smoking section in high school and it was called "the shack" and the teachers would come and walk around to make sure we had names on our cigarettes. Also I can remember walking by the teachers lounge and smoke would come billowing out when the door opened.
Why names on the cigarettes Pepp?
I remember the days when the possession of *sunflower seeds* in school was a major sin...some kids actually got suspended for 2 days for repeatedly spitting the shells into the drinking fountains...gross, yes, but hardly life-threatening by today's standards. Smoking certainly wasn't allowed anywhere on school property! (Except of course by teachers, in the staffroom. No "non smoking" workplaces then!) The same teachers who smoked up the staffroom were the ones who taught us how bad it was in Health class. When asked why they smoked, the answer was invariably, "We've all got to die sometime." Very much do-as-I-say, not-as-I-do. When cornered, our 4th grade teacher who reeked of smoke said, "When you're my age you can do what you want." She tried to quit that New Year's--by the middle of January we were BEGGING her to cave because our nice Mrs Naumann had turned into The Monster from Hell!
To make sure they weren't joints.
Well that makes sense. I thought you meant Pepp's smoke should have Pepper on it.Or whoever.
I smoked plenty.
we had a smoking section in my high school too. very little sleeping with teachers went on as far as i know.
I never slept with a teacher. Now I sleep with my wife. I used to do more than sleep.
frank
We had one teacher (not even handsome or youthful even. but he must have had charisma) who taught at the local high school for years; he was notorious for copping feels from the high schoolie girls, and over the years, he'd nailed quite a few. It was common knowledge, but he'd maintained his position because it was all "merely speculation and rumor." Until one girl ended his career because he ended their affair.
I sent this to my teenage son when he was a senior i high school. Wisdom to live by...
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