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September 04, 2005 |
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The Wired Stocker
FOUND by Amelia A. Cook
in Tybee Island, Georgia
I work at a college library. When I started my job here last November, I found this letter in my desk presumably left behind by my predecessor. Day after day, I keep hoping for my own love letter from "The Wired Stocker"!
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
nice and sweet. i just wonder if he really finished school at all?
He just finished grad school but yet says he's not "wired" and he's "sain"? Good Lord, I hate to imagine what grand school he went to.
Why doesn't he put his email address on the list?
Obviously Richard and Amelia's predecessor have run off to get married and start an extremely fine and sain family! Cool!
Um. I'll go out with you Richard! Just because you're not wired or a stocker, I'm glad you're sain. We can have a fun time not getting married!
i'm confused. i believe his name is "peace," and his salutation "take care richard." odd. but it may work to pique interest.
nonetheless, of all the misspellings, i find "ect" the most interesting.
I love that he has such a high oppinion of himself with such bad grammer, "I am fine aswell" Confidence is everything!
I agree with the comments about Richard's choice of Grad School. I can see why the note was left behind... And where did he write his # and e-mail address??
Well, there seems to be a bit ripped off the top right hand corner - maybe the predecessor took his number and email address, and they eloped?
"Not a wife, but a friend" haha
"If I sound cool..." :\ So what we know about Mr. Richard is... he just finished grad school is in a library, and somehow still has the literacy level of an average 6th grade student. Not cool Richard... not cool.
Does anyone else read this letter in the voice of the Ladies Man character from SNL?
I love how he confidently states that he is as fine as she is. :o)
Oh my God! Oompah-Loompah I SO hear the voice. hahhhhhhhhahahha
I'm fine as well.
I make my living correcting the spelling, grammar and usage of people with advanced degrees. Graduate illiteracy = job security.
Amelia A. Cook: do you live on Tybee Island and work at Savannah State University? :-)
I THINK THIS GUY GAVE ME A NOTE ONE TIME!!!!!!!
I seriously have to question the "sainity" of anyone choosing to attend graduate school in this area. Considering they are either at AASU or SSU. Neither known for feirce competitive academics.
"I am sain."
HAHAHAHAHAHA oh my god, that KILLS me. Just absolutely kills me.
Midlife Crisis, is your company hiring? I want to move to CA in the worst way, and I too correct grammar, spelling and usage for a living.
AHHHH - I, too, hear Leon Phelps, the Ladies Man---Oompah-Loompah, are you in Hershey PA?
He *could* have meant *grade* school. More likely, given the quality of the writing.
colleges are always a target for creepy men to find women.
clearly he hasn't attended grad school... he has misspelled stolker, wired, sain, extremly, and ect (should be etc).
he just strikes me as suspicious.
Notice he says he finished, not he graduated. He may not be a "stolker" but I'm betting he's a quitter.
I hate it when anyone uses the word "fine" to mean attractive. Even if he hadn't mispelled so many things, he'd sound like an idiot.
Dave, so I suppose you have a biiiig problem with that Chiffons song... "he's so fiiiine...do lang, do lang, do lang.. he's all miiiine... do lang, do lang, do lang.."
My favorite thing about Found is all the grammar police and spelling nazis who feel compelled to pick apart the grammar and spelling in the finds, and they have all manner of grammar, spelling and syntax errors in their own posts. Those usually make me laugh more than the Find!
Interesting he described himself in quite a police-report way as a 'black male'.
It takes a true stalker to begin a note with 'I am not a stalker'.
if he wanted her to call him you think he would have left a number? yeah grad school my ass
I especially like the "Not a wife, but a friend" part. He's just luring her into his "stocking" ways.
man, that's funny. wouldn't work on me. i can't teach and train them too. But this is what you call being fast but running slow.
Just a singer-
What's not to pick apart? He starts out with "Hay," (at least he was awake for "comma" week) and it goes downhill from there!
The way it's worded, he just finished "...looking for a cool female friend to go out with..." in addition to having "...just finished grad(e?) school..."
So if he "just finished" looking, what's the note about?
Midlife and Nicole- I wish I'd gone that route. Look on the bright side- at least you're not one of the ones with the hopeless task of teaching. They're the ones who have my respect and sympathy.
What bugged me about this was his claiming to just want a "friend," but almost the first thing he said about her was how "extremely fine" she was.
It wouldn't matter how "extremely fine" she was if he were just looking for a friend. His motives are obvious and I doubt any woman would go for it.
Then again, maybe Richard's got it goin' on. I've been wrong before.
I think by 'friend' he means fuck-buddy.
Creepy!
umm.. how about grad school didnt teach him the abbreviation for et cetera... it is NOT ecT. it is eTc.