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July 15, 2008 |
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Fo Shizzle Dizzle - FOR YOUR ASS TO READ!!
FOUND by Kim Dependahl
in Santa Barbara, California
I found this on the ground while walking through a neighborhood in Santa Barbara. Very romantic if you ask me. HOLLA B!!
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What Have We... July 26, 2006 |
To Die For September 29, 2006 |
Emotions Resolved January 26, 2006 |
I'm Willing to Learn October 02, 2005 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
I'm going to take this to my ESL class, and hip them to real English, fo shizzle! Word!
(Can't wait to see their bitch-ass smiles!)
Mckinney got it goin on!!
Great find.
Jolly good.
Well I, for one, hope she gets to see his ass smile soon.
i have a headache.
thank you, marie, for knowing the difference between "piece" and "peace."
anyone up for the bad-word-of-choice-game?
H*O*L*L*A* ~ right.
My fave part is Fo Shizzle Dizzle -cool.
Santa Barbara sure has changed since the last time I was there many moons ago.
I thought giving us the choice of our favorite bad word was very considerate.
I like "#@&%*$"!
OK Lars. My BWOC: mofo.
Thanks for the laugh as I go on vaca with my....family. I'm gonna need it!
I love this note! I'd totally hang out with this person.
'Anyway' cannot be plural. The word is 'anyway'.
"even if that means he eats trix.."
As in, Trix are for kids?
my BWOC: homie.
he not only eats trix, but he hangs out with them too... (hoes? trix?)
sorry, but this to me sounds like it was written by a white chick tryin' to sound 'hood. She comes off sounding about 14. Fo SHO.
BWOC: Slutf*cker or bitchassc*nt
You want a really choice bad word, turn to John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester. (As in the Johnny Depp film "The Libertine.")
Choice synonyms for the "f word":
To swive
To pudder
To aroint (Thank you Willy S.)
For the "c word"
Tarse
Coney
There are many more but I'm to tired/hot/squiffy to think of any.
Does anyone else's ass read? I dont think mine does. This Mckinney sure has a smart ass.
Does anyone else think its weird that the author of this note wrote it to someone else letting them know what they think of Mckinney?
BWOC #1 = inauspicious
BWOC #2 = squiffy
BWOC: F*ckity (as in "F*ckity F*ck!")
imaginging someone's ass reading reminds me of Jim Carey making his butt talk in what was it? Ace Ventura?
And that Jim Carey scene always reminds my of Bukowski's "All the Assholes" story - the one where his ass takes over his life.
@holla-I think the whole point of the note was that she was trying to sound "hood", as a joke.
I think she couldn't decide whether or not "there is nothing I want more" if the "there's" needed an apostrophe, so she squeezed an "i" in there to make it all good.
Hey, notreallygrammarpolice - i think the general consensus is that it's perfectly acceptable to go all grammar police over the Finds. Just not the finders, or the commenters. I dunno, correct me if i'm wrong.
my BWOC is - c*cksuckingslut (like that's a bad thing. lol)
but i have to say, i love squiffy. and F*ckity F*ck. those are my two new ones. When you have a new word to add to your vocabulary, they say you should say it at least three times on the first day. (that's how you're supposed to remember people's names, too)
Welcome back, Night N Gale. Missed you much.
Somewhere, a Nobel Laureate is crying.
This find made my bitch ass smile.
Bitch ass? Must be written about a dog.
Ya know, if ya'all go hang out in cyberspace, let's say on MySpace, you will see all kinds of wonderful, literate pieces of work, just like this find.
p.s Agree with Holla: trix=hoes..and a 'hood wannabe.
If red surprise could speak...
Actually the writer is clearly very intelligent, as shown by the reference to the Hol lab, which is a laboratory researching the Higher Order Logic theorem.
I'm surprised no one else made this connection.
I like that handwriting, it reminds me of an old girlfriend's (who was really smart). No misspellings, either, that aren't intentional.
BWOC: dick-neck or shit-teeth
BWOC: fecalsmear *Trust me, all aruguments end after you throw this word out. Call someone a fecalsmear, they just can't recover from that insult.*
Also just as insulting and argument-ending, but way more then a word... call someone the 'afterbirth of a Mongolian whore'. YOU WINZ!
@becoming impatient, bite me, you fecalsmear!
True, Sammy Davis, although I think the worst (or best?) site for this type of "writing" is Bebo. EVER1 UZES UPPER CASE.
My BWOC: toadshit.
Snoop Dogg. (*shudder*) Did this fashizzlespeak originate with him, or did he get it from somewhere else?
He gives me the creeps.
@holla,
I don't know if you were joking or not, but I'm pretty sure she *was* a white chick trying to sound like a thug. I'm pretty sure that's the whole point. I'm a white chick and we joke like that sometimes too. And I'm not even 14. I'm not a teenager at all. The fact that you sound like an idiot is what makes it funny. So, yeah we're easily amused.
I reckon this couple are really happy together, there's something so open and fun and tender about it.
My BWOC: cuntybollocks
or bitch bag!
My BWOC: mautaditemardedeculdebatard I like to swear like a French sailor. It trips off the tongue.
Speaking of French swear words, I find it kinda funny that alot of them are religious terms: chalice, bapteme, ostie, tabarnacle whereas English swearwords are mostly about "arointing" (thank you Baby Basil). Mucho cultural differences there.
@Yo homies--look about 14 posts above yours. I guess great minds think alike!
@Effie- Hilarious! Your BWOC sounds so proper and British and I love it!
My BWOC-syphillus-riddled glory hole (actually, it's my husband's, but I stole it!)
BWOC: holy-f**cking-mother-of-God!!
usually used when totally surprised by some outrageous (or terrifying) situation.
i love the 'so to him i leave this note of love' part, but the BWOC part is what makes this all worth it.
mine? i end up saying 'shitdog' a lot. like any BWOC, change your intonation and it has many many meanings. that, and aye mierda!!
My BWOC- C*untlicker, and that's a wonderful thing!!!
BWOC is "chubby-bunny-tummy".
Hahah this is one of the best finds in a while. Fo sho.
BWOC - floppycock. I use it a lot when referring to something not quite right or off kilter. It's not really a bad word, but it makes my kiddos do a double take, and thats what it's all about, right?
Thanks for the support, Mona. Hope you survive the boredom that ooozes out of Ohio like hot lave.
oops--make that 'lava'...
BWOC: I really like butt pirate. Or ass master. Reminds me of Seinfeld.
But my really absolutely most fun thing to say when surprised is "Christ on a cracker!". Gives people pause.
Ok spam protection, I get that 28 times 15 is funny to you because it equals 420 and that is a drug reference (har har), but it's not frickin' funny that I have to do math just to post! Ok, it's a little funny. But just a little.
Christ on a cracker, that's a stupid note!
I wonder what McKinny's first name is. I just keep thinking Trevor.. that kid from pay it forward.
@Someone Very likely the boy's(or possibly girl's) 1st name could be Mckinny. About 12 years ago they was a naming fad in the U.S. using names that started with Mc, or Mac. For example: Mackenzie,Mckenna,etc. So the name would fit a current 12 year old perfectly.:-)
Well, Smallbear, I considered that at first, because I know McKennas, McKenzies, McRibs, and McPersons. But see how she signed the note?: "Marie, one day will be McKinney."
(as in Mrs. McKinney.) So it must be his last name, eh?
I love this find! It made me smile today. I think I'll re-write it and direct it to a friend of mine. She would totally get it and love it as well. :D
i know people who would write a note exactly like this. they speak english perfectly, but the note would be written with a sense that there is an inside joke because of its style which would make it all the more endearing.
nothing like seeing your own last name in a 'found' item. I saw 'McKinney' and though 'holy crap, it's mine', as the handwriting looked familiar... but, I would never write a note like that.
oh, and those of you wondering about the guys first name, McKinney probably is his last name.. but I plan on naming one of my children McKinney someday. Why not? If you can name a kid McKenna/McKenzie, etc?
becoming impatient: those are so, so awesome. i'll remember those. dude, thanks!