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February 26, 2008 |
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They Tricked Me
FOUND by Morethanmedium
in Colorado
I found this note written on Keebler stationary in the case of a Polaroid camera purchased at a flea market... Tampered brake lines, deception, heartbreak.
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Watch Your Man! April 25, 2004 |
The Child May 11, 2003 |
Shorter Shorts... March 24, 2006 |
Love, Margo January 23, 2008 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
Sue: Don't go. It doesn't matter if he's cute and irresistible with elfin features. He's trouble. His family is trouble. Don't go.
This is the best find I've seen in a long time.. great on so many levels! At first I thought it was a metaphor, but now I see it's about about car repairs gone awry. If I understood more about how engines work, the details would mean more to me. However, anyone knows that rags shouldn't be put where other parts belong. That will only last until the tire comes off. Duh! Oh heck, maybe it IS a metaphor. Every thing a symbol. The break line, the rags, the tears.
Hello, T! Hey, guess what...I'm crazy too!
Who knew mechanics could be such a romantic industry?
What I love are the little elves. Makes me think of little Elf mechanics who fall in love for with their clients.
Hey Keebler! Haven't seen you for awhile. This one is definitely for you!
This is blue collar/white trash. And what beautiful prose it is. You know, except for the tampered brakes and fire hazards. Younger man fallen for older woman with kids. He's super sincere and she will toss it to the wayside for someone with a bigger truck. By the times she realizes what she's missed, it will be too late. Didn't they make some movie out of this? Or at least a country song?
Yikes...that guy needs to pass a couple of elementary level English courses before he tries to win anyone else's love back.
This note is very cute though, in a pathetic kind of way.
The young man who wrote this is dislexic...it looks just like my brother's handwriting. It also sounds like him...disastrous relationship, everything is someone else's fault, and the world is out to get me. "They tricked me." Emotional turmoil: "I'm locked and loaded" (rageaholic) and yet "I've never been so lonely." Master complicator! "I can't stop crying...please come home to me." (Do what I want, and everything will be fine.)
Sue, keep your kids safe and away from this guy.
personally, i love the "published by keebler co/beaver bakery as needed" line. classic.
oops. don't have glasses on. i just confused denver with beaver. i feel awesome.
I think that a woman wrote this. 'My heart still bleeds'? How incredibly poetic and graphic. I don't know why; I think the handwriting is like a woman's. I love the irony of the desperate, final plea of a lovesick individual, placed underneath two pictures of some hideously garish elves. Is this a Christmas special? What, Santa has started dispersing employee newletters around his grotto now? That dispels the magic somewhat.
Utterly random piece of stationery, a note scrawled on the fly for a lost love! Vehicular tampering, brotherly betrayal, trickery, "I'm locked and loaded ... Still one step ahead..."
This reeks of espionage and intrigue! ¬¬
What a great find ^^
OMG! Sabotage at the Keebler factory??? heheheh
Sad yet confusing...this is a nice find.
Wow ! One of the Keebler Elves had his or her heart broken. I just love the mixture of work and personal life.
The handwritting is very bad and distracted (left the "t" off "heart"). I feel bad for the person and I hope Sue worked things out.
it's got to be a metaphor. break =/= brake.
Real men cry real tears.
"my hear still bleeds for you....I thing it was my brother..." I thing it was Adam. He was tired of all the sappiness and whining over Sue and tried to put "t" out of his misery.
It starts out so cute with the Keebler Cookie Elf Factory stationery and ends up so tragically with the tears and the begging...just like life.
Very nice find.
I hear those Elf brothers will go to any length to keep the location of their tree house a secret.
Aladd - I love beaver bakery!
Basil - I am so glad to read yours. It sounds exactly right. I felt like I couldn't follow the note and what was going on and what he was saying, but now I realize: It's him not me! I hope she stayed away, too.
Good find. Sad, but something’s not right about T. I bet he's full of conspiracy theories. I have some theories of my own about found and the damn spam protection questions.
Sounds like Sue is well rid of this guy. I think he is trying to make excuses for why he didn't do something, and blaming it on his brother. People who lie tend to put all sorts of inconsequential details in their lies, to make it sound more real. Why does Sue need to know about the "spindal"? And who cares if it lasts "in till" the tire comes off? He's trying too hard, to make himself sound more pathetic and preyed up on, so she'll feel sorry for him, and drag herself back to this loser.
Run Sue run.
Mona, you've hit the nail on the head.
yeah... i know whereof i speak, pepp.
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This is one uncommonly crazy Keebler elfployee.
EGGS!!!!!! where you been buddy? someone tamper with your break lines?
A man with a plan of vengeance. They may have tricked her, but now he is locked and loaded. Now as soon as Sue gets back, they are going to go out and wreak sweet destruction on the vehicles of his enemies.
This note was made by pequenos insanos.
Hi, Eggs.
Of course, there is always the possibility that someone really is out to get T. After all, his brakes were tampered with.
I have a feeling that Sue is actually the employee of Keebler. She has left him and is staying at a friend's house (or his brother's house?!!) and T is alone at the apartment. He wrote this note on the only paper he could find lying around.
But, is his brother trying to kill him? Is Sue in on it?
Or, is T the "crazy dwarf" http://www.foundmagazine.com/find/2158 ?
Hey, Flargy, what could i say in spanish to a really sweet guy that would make his heart melt?
Ya got me, Mona. I'll have to find some Latino sap and ask him. I'll let you know what he recommends.
In the meantime, you might want to try pointing at him and screaming, "MUY, MUY, MUY GUAPO!!!" then feigning a swoon. It won't make his heart melt, but it should boost his ego enough to at least chat you up a bit.
thanks, Flargmeister. Your earlier murdering of spanish threw me off.
"I thing it was my brother"???
He doesn't know how to tell the difference between "thing" and "think"?!
How did Sue even carry out a conversation with this man?
PS-28 times 15 is what? Spam protection requires a calculator, and I'm thinking that conspiracy theory could quite possibly be true...
Just because you're paranoid, T, doesn't mean they're NOT after you
Mona, the murdering of Spanish was intentional. Apparently you didn't get the reference to the TV commercial from the '80s with the song about cookies being made by "Pequenos Keebleros." Did I hear something about you being from Canada? Maybe they didn't run that ad up there.
If my hear was still bleeding, I wonder if my smell was still oozing.
It would have been awesome if I could have gone to see Joe Strummer and the Keebleros.
What up, Eggy Weggy?
Sue, he's lying! His brake lines weren't tampered with... he was DRUNK, again, and that tree just came up out of his alcoholic haze and let him wrap the car around it.
Don't buy the story, it was baked by little guys in a hollow tree.
In my head I'm hearing the theme music from "The Lone Gunman," with overtones of "X-Files." The stream of consciousness style seems to indicate that the author of the find was writing in a hurry... perhaps he heard the scuttling to tiny elfin feet coming to take him away? The brother had been indoctrinated into some sort of Keebler Cult and "T" learned too much: Sue left him because she thought he was paranoid and delusional, but now she is starting to rethink her assessment after "T" mysteriously vanished. She searched his apartment high and low but never found this note, which “T” had hidden in the camera case so that “They” wouldn’t find it.
After the police officially closed the cast of “T”s disappearance, his family boxed all his stuff and took it to the flea market, where the Finder came across the note.
Sorry, one last excessive post for today. The paper this is written on is especially appropriate for me today, considering I'm leaving Connecticut for Denver in about 10 minutes. So long, suckers.
Shakespeare ain't got NOTHING on this note! This is fabulous. It's got more Shakespearean literary and dramatic elements than his own stuff!
this note has got to be in secret-keebler-elf code, because otherwise, it just doesn't make a ton of sense!
What does he mean by "I'm locked and loaded"?
Oh, the desperation and lonliness, the loss of hope, the car trouble. Poor T.
T, don't be fooled! Sue was the mastermind behind the sabotage to your delivery truck. She needed you out of the way so she could date your brother. Those aren't even her kids, they are her elven mercenaries. Watch your back, dude.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn't "locked and loaded" a reference to a gun being ready to fire? My ex used to say that whenever he thought someone was out to get him. Example: “The next time the f@ckers come for me I’m gonna be locked and loaded. They’re my mortal enemies.” (Taken from an IM conversation.)
"Well, what am I supposed to do? You won't answer my calls, you change your number. I mean, I'm not gonna be ignored, Sue!"
Love,
Ernie the Keebler Elf
ps:
I cooked your rabbit and dipped it in fudge!
Flargy, enjoy Denver. I know I do.
This reminds me of the scene in Blues Brothers where John Belushi is telling Carrie Fischer why he left her at the alter: "There were hurricaines, floods, it was terrible...IT WASN'T MY FAULT!" Then he ditches her again.
Run, Sue, Run.
"T" is a nutball--and not the usual Keebler kind, deliciously covered in fudge, but the scary kind that will kill you because he sees the devil looking out of your eyes.
Is this disturbing found week? So far it's working...
I think the first line is just a playful rhyme with her name...a lyric from a song?
I think he is a truck owner/operator, freelancing for Keebler. Something happened to the brakes on the truck he uses to deliver Keebler products and he lost his job.
Sue got the heck out because T always has an excuse. T is saying, it's all good, I'm ready to roll, locked and loaded, gonna get my job back, so come home already.
T thinks his bro messed with breaks.
I think T is a manipulator..."hope you and your kids are happy" doesn't seem so sincere.
If this were a movie, I can see a desperate Nicholas Cage playing T.
Wow. this is probably the most dramatic, sounds like its out of an action movie post i've seen so far. i wanna know more. and the keebler paper? an interesting twist.
'They tricked me' is probably the most distrubing part of a most disturbing missive. Who are "they"? What was the trick? Why does T associate the trick with Sue leaving (good for you Sue!)?
T-
Sue and the kids are definitely happy now that they've gotten away from your deplorable grammar, unconscionably wretched spelling, and endless excuses. Learn to write a note that actually makes sense and take responsibility for your actions and maybe...JUST MAYBE!...she might consider possibly taking you back. Maybe.
Best of luck.
"Hope you and YOUR kids are happy", why not THE kids, sounds like he wasn't very keen on getting involved in Sue's family life, so definitely best shot of him.
Muy,muy,muy Guapo!
http://foundmagazine.com/find/714
I read 'Love T' as 'Love +'...
And then rather than finishing that thought the writer put in another plea to Sue.
Those elves are always tricking me too. Not to worry, I'm locked and loaded. DO YOU HEAR ME ERNIE? LOCKED.AND.LOADED. I'M ONE STEP AHEAD AND I'M COMING FOR YOU COOKIE MAN.
The elves are sneaky. You think they're nice, cuz they make cookies, and live in trees, and all that. Next thing you know, they're cutting your break lines and blaming it on your brother.
I totally agree with Nick Cage playing the psycho ex-boyfriend. OMG yes, with the long hair he was wearing in Con Air. oh yes. yummy. And he's driving that cookie truck, with the broken break lines, and he's swearing at Sue.. probably singing a song, really badly, looking psycho-sexy, like only Nick Cage can.
oh man... yeah....
contrary to popular belief, the opposite to bad is not keebler elves. I'm just sayin.
and i'm going to call my friend el guapo. maybe that'll make his heart melt.
Mona Lisa,
you have a very rich fantasy life at work!
nick cage fantasies occur every minute of every day. lol
the elf thing? that's real.
those damn elves tricked him and cut his break lines. little bastards.
NIck cage..crreeepy.
Cookies make you go nuts. I was all hopped up on chips ahoy once and did an ollie on my wheelie board and I fell back and the wheelie board shot out in front of me and it was crazy.
What a bizarrely unusual find.
The stationary? an employee of Keebler?
The weird handwriting and mispellings, unfinished thoughts?
And the heartbreak and brake lines being cut.
Just weird, weird, and weird.
And who tricked them?! Are they stuck in an institution or rehab center?
They tried to make me go to rehab I said No No No!I do NOT have a cookie problem! The elves are real! They talked my brother into cutting my brake line! My brother! He's in on it too! Oh Sue come back to me! I cry and cry and the more I cry the more I eat cookies and the more I eat cookies, the more I see those damn elves! They tricked me! I've never been so lonely!
PS. Hope you and your kids are happy, 'cause I'm f'ing miserable!
So, anyway, WHY did T's brother saboutage his car? WHY was Sue waiting for him to show up? What was going on that he promised to get there for? Was it 'the last straw' for Sue? Had she moved out with her kids BEFORE the car problems? Why do I care enough to have wondered all that?
This is both creepy and heartbreaking. I really want to know the rest of the story.
Also, "Come home please...goodbye"? Add that to the list things in this note that don't make sense.
Mona, you gonna make your husband jealous, in Spanish? :)
--The answer to my spam question is the answer to life, the universe and everything. Way to go, Found!
At first I read the header then pictured a guy in the Keebler factory, working the cookie-making machine, freaking out because the brake line has been cut. Cookies flying everywhere, and he can't stop it or even slow it down! A little bit reminiscent (spelling?) of I Love Lucy.
They put a rag where the WHAT? and spindle goes?
Amy-
Your version reminds me of the Family Guy episode where Lois walks in on Cookie monster in the bathroom stall and he's trying to cook a cookie with a spoon and a lighter.
and in the role of "Sue", I would propose Sean Young
cassisu-42? I'll take a Pan Galactic Gargle-Blaster, please. It's been a long day.
There's more on the back. wish I knew what it said. It's very intriguing. Sounds like a country song. Sue decides to come back to him, right as the "breaks" go out on a mountain road, and he skids out of control, and off the edge, down into the ravine, and now SHE can't stop crying, but buries her grief in the arms of the mysterious brother, never knowing he was the one who tampered with the "breaks".
Well...it WOULD make a good country song...Brad Paisley could sing it...kind of like Whiskey Lullaby, only it would be called "The Ballad of Two Brothers".
Wow...I need to cut back on the coffee...
After the wreck, there would be a tribute song that goes like this...There were three Keebler cookies, on the right side of the highway...
Oh, man I have to let up on the koolaid pie, as well as the coffee, my imagination is out of control.
What IS Koolaid Pie, anyway?
CORNY!
http://www.foundmagazine.com/find/854
klutch in albuquerque, I dodged to hit a tree, but found out later it my car freshener.
Julse, have you tried the koolaid pid?
Sure, that's how I've gained twenty pounds in the last year. I eat it every time I get on found, which seems to be more and more these days. I'm addicted to koolaid pie and found.
I like my koolaid pie extra hot.
Wow,
Who knew this would spark so many bizarre comments? I submitted this about a year ago and forgot about it until this morning when I got the email saying it was the find of the day...
By the way, there wasn't anything on the back...
the stationary is magnificent. this find wouldn't be half as good without it, though still quite interesting..
also, whats up with no spam question lately??
wow, it really looked like there was something written on the back at the top. maybe the ink just bled from the folds or something.
There were so many comments that I had to go back to the top to read the letter again just to remember it. Poor T.
Run,Sue......Run!!!!!!!
Don't ever look back! Especially if 'T' is 'locked and loaded'!!!!
We all know what that means!
UGH...I can't stand it when people don't use proper spelling and grammar. GGGRRR!!!
My guess is that a dumb 6'7" redneck heroin junkie with delusions of grandeur and persecution wrote this. Or someone just like him.
Okay, I was thinking of a whole different kind of pie.
It's always a different kind of pie.
ban pepper.
If this guy works on his car as much as he does his spelling...and grammar...and sentence structure...etc.......It explains a lot.
1
...pondering being both compassionate toward and creeped out by someone at the same time. Is it possible cassisu?
I didn't see it as being signed by "T," I saw it as a plus sign- as in, "love and they tricked me"... a run-on signoff, just like the rest of the note.