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July 17, 2008 |
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The Pledge
FOUND by Steven Sherrill
in Charlotte, North Carolina
I walked out of my (shitty) apartment one spring morning in 1991 and found this message scotch taped to every post and pole along three blocks of McClintock Road. I use the find regularly in my fiction writing classes, and it still moves me after all these years. I wish the scanner could capture the smudges, tears, and tape residue. I hope Mary was grateful.
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Nudge Nudge ... November 23, 2007 |
Altar Boy July 22, 2007 |
Happy Monkey August 11, 2007 |
Bastards They Are October 21, 2005 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
i'm confused. does it say "deep dear" before "i'll always love you"?
"Deep down, I'll always love you."
This person has a great future in writing blues songs: "You can drag me through the mud, throw me down and walk all over me, put my name on every men's room wall in the nation, but I will always love you!"
Can you spell "codependent?" If the writer doesn't become a blues singer, I foresee great success in life as a doormat!
They didn't even sign the note...it's like "You know who I am! Just look down on the ground under your feet, I'll be there."
Mary sounds like a real user. And the writer is a loser who likes to be used. The more painfully, the better.
Get some pride, dude. Srsly.
ahhh, the sweet smell of addiction.
Oh, but we all want her
and we want her badly
because if nothing else is true,
one thing is certain:
she’s an internal combustion
in an otherwise
push-button universe.
I know Mary but she has changed her name and i will pledge my undying devotion to her as well. Please hurt me so i can ask for more. Divorce is so difficult to deal with. The sense of loss is crushing, just like this note
Wow, he's willing to pay her RENT? For heaven's sake, Mary, keep this guy around.
Mary's a crack head. Her dude / parent will pay rent (directly) because Mary can't be trusted with cash in her hand.
Mary, get some treatment!!
P.S. Mary, I'm also an idiot. Please walk all over me. And then kick me in the face on your way out the door (again). Thank you very much, ma'am. May I have another?
- Sheesh! And then to put this on every post and pole in the neighborhood for everyone to see??
Has to be from Mary's grandfather.
damn, dude. stay away from mary. she's sucking you dry!
I paid Mary's bail once too.
What a disaster that turned into.
Ingrate.
I've never got cool notes like this one. No one to pay my rent, or my bail, darn it. I must be doing something wrong.....
I totally read this as a passive-aggressive note. The implied need for bail money in the future, the posting on every telephone pole on the street lead me to believe that any tears on the note were tears of laughter and relief that Mary, the leech from hell, is gone for good.
I should not need a calculator to post on this site humph!!! Spam Protection a neccessary evil
I love what's in parenthesis today! How help = books and rent (I thought it said school boots) and whatever = bail. Haha! And Steven's (shitty) apartment, that cracks me up. (Great Find, Steve!)
I wonder if Mary is hiding in her (bath)room?
(Today's the 1st anniversary of the first time I posted a comment.) (Not that you'd care.)
I hope Mary is dead.
(I CARE!! Happy Anniversary!)
If this Find had come from WA, I'm quite sure I'd have known the author of the note, and who Mary is...
but it didn't, so I don't. But I will say I agree with feeling in coherent up there- Mary's either a tweeker or a crackho. What a life. (she must have beer flavored nipples or something- wtf makes Mary that Great?)
(H!! It was supposed to be ushering. oh well. USER must be the recurring theme here.)
Mary:
On the surface I may seem deep.
But deep down I'm shallow.
(Happy anniversary, Nighty!)
UMMMM...Can we all say, *SUGAR-DADDY*???
MARY...give this person a break, and either shape up or ship out!!!
*How many more times* (LED ZEP SONG!) are you gonna' *use and abuse* this angel in your life, and not have any feelings or emotions about the heart-ache and stress you've put them through?
MARY, don't you have ANY integrity???
Bitchbag! (Thanks, EFFIE!)
Night, I thought it said BOOTS too!!
Oh, and HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, NIGHTINGALE!!! WELCOME HOME! HAHA!
Am I the only one wishing I could read some of steven's (the finder) fiction writing that is inspired by this find?
I also thought the writer seems to be a parent or grandparent or even a friend but not a boyfriend.
Nighty, we do too care! (Mine's coming up soon, too!) Happy found anniversary! *going backward to read the momentous first comment*
(Only one more week till Ancient Vivi's found birthday!)
That's some real love right there. I feel bad for the writer of this note, because they can't expect too much back from this Mary girl.
I think the writer was male, and i think that he's either the father, or good friend who may have at one point had a relationship with this crazy.
People stop loving others because of people like Mary.
Mary is a fecalsmear...
@Jonathon:
"On the surface I may seem deep.
But deep down I'm shallow."
That's hilarious! (And, dare I say: deep.)
*having just returned from before my time, where I found Nightingale's first found comment* Oh-h-h.. remember Rex? and Writer, Rejected? and hotmom? and Sean S.? Are they still around? And SALT was being censored even back then, apparently. Thanks for the walk down Memory Lane, Nighty!
Hey! Weird! I'm going to Mary's Peak today! "Marys Peak, at 4,097 feet, is the highest point in Oregon’s Coast Range and the most prominent peak to the west of Corvallis."
Hmmmmmmmm...what was I doing on July 17th 2007 when Night in gale posted that first comment?
Let's see...oh I remember...
um...uh-oh
No, nothing, nevermind.
Continue about your business.
I know a Mary, too, but her name is Windy. She used to be a hottie, but that was a long time ago. Now she's a habitual offender and has three children (all from different dads) that she is not allowed to be around anymore.
I am sad for both Mary and for the writer. Life is so hard for some people.
There's just something about Mary...
So glad I popped in today!! LOVE THIS HOOD!!
He found this over 17 years ago. I wonder if Mary ever got her life together. This sounds like something my parents would write to my brother, and he is 45 years old. Severe alcoholism. Severe enabling.
As soon as I read "buy school books" I started wondering how young this girl is compared to the guy. Anyways, she sounds like a crackhead whore, so she probably would be in a weird relationship xD
Mary sounds like a real winner.
holy shit. I can't believe how unaffected & cynical most of the commenters are.
i think this is a beautiful find.
@Istillbelieve--The writer appears to be cynical, as well. "To pay your bail"..? Hello?
Prompted by Night and Clover's comments I went back in time to read some old posts. (It's not important if I ever actually get ANY work done.)
My one conclusion - that Rex dude was intense!
BTW - I'm taking a little holiday tomorrow and all next week - so although I'll miss all of youse guys - I don't plan to get anywhere near a computer.
You can compliment my 'comments' on how tan they are when I get back.
"Send a message to Mary,
But don't tell her she's in jail.
She'll never notice
Unless I pay her bail.
Send a message to Mary,
You know that she's in a jam.
But it's gone too far now,
I really don't give a damn."
With apologies to the Everly Brothers, but the original is now spinnning in my head (click) spinning in my head (click) spinning in my head...
Don't pay the bail, dude. We all got dues to pay.
Happy Anny, Night!
Clover, The person I wonder about is Creepy Counter. Whenever I see 'creepy' a lot in the comments I think about him. And Sean S is still around. He had some Finds even. Sometime in June I think. I'm sure one of the Found Addicts--oops, I mean Found Fans--could tell you what the Finds from Sean were.
istillbelieveitspossibletobe in love: you poor, misguided, innocent child. The comments here are cynical because we've all lived a bit. Once or twice around the block and it's hard not to be jaded. With age comes cynicism.
User in g: I sort of like the word 'usering'. It's apt for this Find on a couple of levels since Mary is probably as user in the area of substance abuse and she is probably a user in the sense of taking advantage of the kindness of others.
For the grammar geeks and verbivores out there 'usering' is probably interesting. It's taking a verb and making it a noun and then converting that noun back into a different verb entirely.
One more thought: Night--let's add 'usering' to the Found Dictionary!
Not Found addict--Foundhound.
Mary is on drugs. She doesn't love you, she doesn't love herself. If you want to 'be there' for Mary, stop enabling her, that's the most valuable thing you could ever give her.
P.S. Never bail out a drug addict. They're usually better off in jail.
I also like the term Foundites. but not as much as I like Foundhounds.
Someone used "foundians" but for some reason it doesn't sound melodious and true to my ear.
bye, Alan! bon voyage... we'll miss you!!!
See you in Ohio at the chili cook-off, Al.
SUCKER!
@Night Happy Aniversary!
I myself prefer the term Foundian, sounds very civilized and I consider myself a civilized bear.
As for the Find, I have to wonder if Mary's real name is Layla?
I hate this note. It is from a mother to her daughter...a daughter who has taken advantage of mom and mom coming back for more. And more and more and shit on me again, cuz I will still take more.
I like Foundfanatique, cuz that's me. Did someone already say Found fiend? Which suddenly popped into my head. That's a good one too. So are all the other Found phrases you guys have come up with. No matter what you call it, it's all the same, and WE know what we mean!
Btw, I am shocked and offended to find that Marys Peak does not have an apostrophe. Really and officially. What's with that?
@Alan, miss you already. But you deserve a break. Have fun and come back soon!
@yes, it's me.. I don't remember Creepy Counter. He/she must have come on the scene during one of my busy work periods.
I don't believe that the Creepy Counter was always one specific person ... I think that anyone who felt like counting the creepies did so. For some stretches it was probably the same person, but at other times, other counters. Which makes me ponder.. we haven't had a genuinely CREEPY Find in a while.. got anything in store for us, Found?
(so anyway, if ever you get the urge or feel the need, please, Feel Free to count creepies on any given day. someone else might even come along afterward and calculate the relative creepiness of the Find. Fun times!)
Have I mentioned today how much I love this site? And everyone else here who "gets it"? It's true!! All my life I've been a Fan of Found stuff- whether it's pretty rocks, broken jewelry, or the discarded detritus of other peoples' lives. I'm part packrat, part voyeur, I suppose. But not many people in my little world have "gotten it." So yeah, I guess I'm feelin' the same love that Holly was feelin' the other day. And Clover today (was that today? whenever. it's all just one long day.) Thanks, everyone, for making the world a more interesting place.
Oh, and if you can, CALL IN WELL on Tuesday, July 22. Tom Robbins Day.
toodles.
Nightingale? Is this for real? Was your first day to comment really on JM's bday?
Freaky. No, seriously.
YKWho in YKWhere: did you just see my post on the flip side or are you psychic (or as my polish cleaning lady likes to say psychotic)?
I know! Seriously! I think Ghetto Booty's party invitation was posted that day just for James. And what a wild ride this past year has been!
Happy Birthday, James Molenda! You're the man!
After reading all the relevant and somewhat relevant comments (late this evening)...you people are so funny. I am definitely a Foundite/Found-ict/Found-cessed.
Sammy Davis Junior, Jr, lighten up.
Tweekers. Where I live, Mary would be a Tweeker.
HA!! Great minds think alike, I guess... I didn't see yours before I posted mine! (and yeah, I'm just a little psychotic. Um. I mean psychic.)
The James Bday thing to me is just.. strange. Too coincidental. Others have mentioned this before- that fascinating and strange occurrences surround the whole Found Phenomenon.. it's freakin' awesome, but it's a little unnerving. Or maybe this is just the third beer talking. I'll make it shut up now.
I just had to go to the online Urban Dictionary to find out exactly what a tweeker was (I did have a general idea--although this is debatable, I'm not a complete idiot).
love,
joseph
p.s. i'd even go looking for a room at the inn for you when you're pregnant but not by me.
http://foundmagazine.com/find/576
I was wondering whose bday this one might have been posted for... but then look at the Finder!
Which brings me back around to my favorite pesterful question: Found guys, do you think you'll ever add a search by date capability to your search function? That would ROCK. (and will you ever be able to trust us with simple HTML commands again? Oh pleeease?)
OK I know. I'll shut up now. Thanks, happy dreams, and .. seeya tomorrow.
..magic dreams..
@lars.. good one!
@ SMALLBEAR- Wha..?? No, her name is MARY...my LAYLA is very grateful and unconditionally loves, listens and is ALWAYS there for us. Very loyal, too.
However, I know the name, LAYLA rocks!
@ KEEP ON ROCKIN'- You hit it spot on, buddy! I ALWAYS feel love, loved, or loving when I visit FOUND. As I'm sure all of us FOUNDIANS do!!!
Love your Username!!!
If I trust in you, would you let me down?
Would you laugh at me, if I said I care for you?
Could you feel the same way too?
I wanna know......
The name of the game
@Holly I was referring to the fictional layla from my post to Find # 2479, not your doggy from whom I stole the name.:-) I'm sure your layla is a wonderful dog and not at all crazy or slutty.
Happy Anniversary, Night n gale. Of course we care when your anniversary is. I don't remember mine. Wish i did. Maybe i should try to find it.
oh, and istillbelieveits possible. We're affected. not unaffected.
Oddly enough, I kind of saw Mary as the victim. Mary, a young college student, broke, turned to an older friend (maybe of her parents, maybe not) that took advantage of the situation. Love/Money/Philanthropy?
I don't know, that is just the situation that popped in my head.
I think I know who this Mary is. no kidding. In 1991 she lived right down the road from where I live now. (Around Mclintock in Tempe) At the time she had a meth problem, which would explain the options of bail and not being able to support herself. She's a sweet girl with a lot of problems... but she did get help.
I just read this and thought... oh, that has to be her.
Charlotte, NC. Represent.
I look at this and immediately dislike the poster. Mary was a user, maybe, but the level of desperation that made the writer tape and post this missive across three blocks makes me itch.