 |
August 27, 2007 |
|
 |
|
|
Make a Rude Video
FOUND by Martha M.
in Winter Park, Florida
I assume this was a tearful love letter after a breakup with his/her lover. It really just speaks for itself. It made me chuckle for a long while. Enjoy!
Sign in or register to start a profile and keep track of your comments. You may also post without creating a profile, but you'll have to answer some tough spam protection questions.
The Motown Man May 20, 2007 |
Take Me To The River August 10, 2006 |
First Job July 21, 2005 |
I'm in Love with ... December 27, 2007 |
 |
|
 |
         |
We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
making rude videos rules!
Oh, holy smokes!
I imagine a young couple, maybe 15-17 years old breaking up before summer camp?
The last little paragraph just captures the immaturity of the entire ordeal.
Ah, teenage angst. When you feel your world will crumble without dear Pauly in it - especially when there are unfulfilled promises of visits to theme parks and rude videos yet to be shot. But my favorit part is *hurry up and do some physics and invent [a transporter]* Pauly must have a lot on the ball.
Teenager? Nah, sounds more like a Canadian or English guy. Noticed the Tonnes? "Rude" sounded like a word that English would use as a form of overexaggeration
There are no teenaged Brits or Canadians? Huh.
Sounds like Pauly's got a clinger. BTW, "I wish transporters were real"? Odd thing to say.
where was it found
if yer gonna say canadian or brit because of the "tonnes" then anyone could say american because of "gallons" in canada we use litres, and i think the UK does as well, really i think everyone except the US uses metric
It made you chuckle? I'm an old man (mid 40s) and it nearly broke my cynical old heart. I remember feeling like this... Does anyone else remember the lost feeling of having what you thought would last forever suddenly just slip away? I do. I hope she's to the point of at least o.k. by now. Great find. Thanks.
It actually has some really cute turns of phrase.
But seriously, Pauly, how COULD you end it before they do all that good stuff?
welcome to the cyber-age. whatever happened to handwriting rambling, tear stained heartbroken letters to the one you love? have to admit, i'd be pretty peeved about missing out on disneyland!!
I'm with you, Uulargh, hormones make meat puppets out of all of us at some point. At that moment, she (?) was convinced that she (?) would love Pauly her (?) whole life. It's wonderful ... achingly wonderful.
Comic Sans? Most definitely a teenage girl.
i love driving holidays. AND transporters. i wish i knew physics.
Nah, doesn’t sound British to me. We would say 'tons' not 'tonnes' (a 'tonne' is some foreign metric thing).
‘...if it was the war’? I wonder which one.
Maybe the breakup will make this poor kid grow up a little. Not wishing to sound hard-hearted – I do remember that feeling. Waaaah!
Mike in MN, 'transporters' as in teleporters, i.e. science-fiction thingies to magic you from A to B (but remember what happened in 'The Fly'? Don’t go there).
Comic Sans – oh dear – I fear she is destined to become a primary school teacher...
see http://bancomicsans.com/home.html
tee hee...
There’s a Neptune’s Kingdom at Thorpe Park (UK) but also one at Santa Cruz. So take your pick.
rude videos are great until..your parents find them!
She's definitely not American.
"driving holiday"? Every teenager would say 'roadtrip.'
"rude video"? Oh, I can think of many things an American teenager would call that, and yes, Comic Sans is a dead giveaway.
Anywho, as a teenager myself, I have to say, these notes are all too common.
Hilarious though...
It seems to me that they were a couple of teenagers who thought they could be smart and break up after a wonderful summer camp or something like that, but when it actually happened the poor girl freaked out. She figures that if they were actually together the relationship would still be strong, and I suppose it would. It sounds like she's her worst enemy because the last part is just begging for him to come back. Pauly, send her a letter, but make it clear that it's really over. Long distance sucks.
ha ha My roommate's name is Paul and I call him Pauly all the time. I think I'll print this out and leave it somewhere for him.
It seems that not only have they broken up , but Pauly's going away somewhere for a while . My vote is jail .On drug charges !
Jonathan: I was going to post that link. I can't stand that font. Oh yes, teen angst, trying to sound more mature, lost loves, broken promises and boys named Pauly. But why would she encourage him to make a transporter if they're breaking up?
Pauly Shore made a video nasty?
This sounds british to me, you know, with the 'driving holiday' and all. Plus, it sounds so formal. typewritten? As for comic sans.. well, thats not limited to adolescence, happens to be my favourite font. For informal things like heartrending 'dont break up with me' notes. lol
i'm imagining a rude Pauly Shore video now... thanks for the visual image i cant remove from my brain.
I really don't think we have teenagers here... Geeks, maybe. But geek love is just as deep as "normal" love. This is begging for a return. We've done the beg at one time or another. This seems to be theirs.
They must have been a fun couple who planned for more fun times. They do not deserve to be made fun of.
I agree with Uulargh and HairmanDan. Shame on you judgenmental bitches.
pauly reminds me of a bird
Yeah, I'm more in the "breaks my heart" camp with this one. Sure, the writer is a bit...uh...simple?...but I don't like laughing at people's honestly-expressed (and private) sentiments, unless they really deserve it. This is a bit silly, sure, but the emotion is very strong.
I don't think this about two teenagers. They may be young, but they aren't talking about summer camp. It sounds more like two college grads (?) who have accepted jobs in different locations (hence the intense desire to be able to transport) and they haven't broken up YET. But the relationship isn't handling the long distance very well.
I wonder where this was found and where the rest of it is.
I cannot even begin to count the number of rude-video promises that kept me in unsatisfying relationships. Interesting find. Was it re-typed for this web site?
HAHAHA Comic Sans. Oh, man.
I bet they were breaking up because they were going to college across the country. They still care about each other but recognize the need to grow as people. Alas!
Don't we ALL miss our Paulys when we lose them?
Take it easy on the broken-hearted. Sounds like a very fresh emotional wound. I remember that empty-chested feeling and tears and that horrible feeling that everyone I passed looked happier on the outside than I felt on the inside. Thankfully, I'm now too cynical and shielded to let anyone close enough to hurt me again. I will probably die alone and riddled with regret, but I can always live in the past and cling to memories. Isn't it ironic that this note is written in Comic Sans...funny with something missing.
Yeah, this would be so much more poignant if it weren't in Comic Sans...
(Also, freak in g out, may I make a suggestion? Never admit online that your favorite font is comic sans. People will judge you. I'm afraid the grammarians might start throwing rotten tomatoes!)
Sorry this has nothing to do with today's find... Just thought the "Found" Guys might like today's "Word of the Day" from M-W.com
The Word of the Day for August 27 is:
objet trouve \AWB-zhay-troo-VAY\ noun
: a natural or discarded object found by chance and held to have aesthetic value
Example sentence:
The museum's latest show, which features objets trouves, is a dramatic change from last year's exhibition of medieval religious art.
Did you know?
"Objet trouve" comes from French, where it literally means "found object." The term entered English during the early 20th century, a time when many artists challenged traditional ideas about the nature of true art. Surrealists and other artists, for instance, held that any object could be a work of art if a person recognized its aesthetic merit. "Objet trouve" can refer to naturally formed objects whose beauty is the result of natural forces as well as to man-made artifacts (such as bathtubs, wrecked cars, or scrap metal) that were not originally created as art but are displayed as such.
Oh for heaven's sake!! My typing is bad not my spelling!
No mention or concern about how Pauly feels, huh?
As if Pauly doesn't feel bad enough, she tells him to do physics and make a transporter as a weak attempt to distract from her manipulation and then has to throw in a guilt trip at the end..."you promised" she attacks his word.
I agree that this is a NON-teenager. Cute turns of phrase. War references without the drama of war, just the lonliness. Disney Land in the same line as rude video.
I dig real sentiment and I get a true vibe off this one.
Who among us has not had a night long conversation on the Physics of love and cartoons?
This is sweet & ridiculous all at once. I wonder if Pauly ever responded?
I'd say two teenagers. The girl is about sixteen, and Pauly has either moved or gone to college. Their breakup is probably, according to Pauly, because she'll be happier. Bull.
I have to agree with this notes author- scientists need to get off their lazy asses and create teleportation devices!
I can think of only a few things (like if I was the lucky jackass who bought that damn ticket in Indiana, for example) that would make me happier.
Where the heck is SALT? I miss him. :(
she most certainly is american, it was found in florida, and she wants to go on a driving holiday to disneyland, pretty sure you can't drive to disneyland from the UK...i doubt she's that young, just a person who likes comic sans, even though courier new is much better.
Disneyland is in Anaheim, Disney World is in Orlando. Although over seas, Disneyland is used to mean Disney World.
These are young British lovers, no doubt...Fate has torn them apart...Pauly may in fact be very ill or involuntarily away, like prison, but it seems an indeterminate time...She wishes it were war (they send soldiers to Iraq in England also) so it would be definitely a year apart, and she wants him to be brave as well as she...She really dreams of him "beaming down" from far away via a transporter, because she in her young-love fantasy simply wants to go away with him and jump his bones! This is really a tragedy unfolding....
I think the writer is British. Neptune's Kingdom is in Thorpe Park, in England, and Disney Land would probably refer to Disney Land Paris, just across the Chunnel. That, and the reference to a driving holiday instead of a roadtrip were my clues.
I think that she and Pauly have never actually met, and instead had an intense online relationship. One of them is probably British and the other American, hence the bi-national phrasings. Either the author or Pauly printed out this email to save it, or maybe to show it to a close friend.
I bet Pauly finally had a reality attack, and came to terms with the near impossibility of this turning into a real-life relationship.
I thought it was heart-breaking, too, and was disheartened to see people chuckling at it.
I love David Bowie.
Life is shit, life is shit
The world is shit, the world is shit
This is life as we know it
I was trying to think of ways to celebrate my upcoming anniversary. Now I have a whole list!
1. Neptune's Kingdom
2. Disneyland
3. Driving holiday
4. Ski-ing
5. Make rude video
I have to agree with Em - the girl is still in highschool and the boy has left for college. Probably in Science Major, which is why she hopes he can build a transporter so she can visit him.
Also, I think the author may be British. And, she is really destroyed! It is a very interesting find, but I don't think it's "funny". What has happened to some our commenters ability to empathize with other human beings?
Least favorite find to date. There is something terribly boring about sappy tearful breakup letters. I find myself sympathizing with Pauly.
What constitutes a "rude video"?
Maybe she meant "rude video" in the most literal sense, like a video of someone flipping the viewer the bird, interrupting people, farting at the dinner table, etc. Now THAT would be my kind of video.
Flarge, you literally made me smile. Most every other comment has been sans comic. zzzz
She goes through about 2347923 different moods in this letter.
She's trying so hard, and Pauly probably has another lover already.
P.S. Unworthy, you crack me up.
After reading all of your comments, it truely amazes me that the writer of the found note seems much more "grown up" that a majority of the commentors.
I accidentally posted about a "video nasty" before I really knew what it was. I always assumed, after watching the Young Ones, that a "video nasty" was something kinda sexy. It's not. I also never knew that if you wikipedia "video nasty", it's not just a word made up by those wacky Brits who put out one of the greatest TV programmes (is that you spell it?) of all time. It's when Bambi goes crazy-ape-bonkers with his drill and sex.
Turbo, you just popped my video nasty cherry.
Planet earth is blue, and there's nothing I can do. . . I sure miss my college angst-ridden relationship. We never went anywhere fun, either, and we always went there on Greyhound.
freak in g... Comic Sans is also my favorite... and I dont get whats wrong with it? I mean... what makes it worse than any other font? Sheesh.
This is one of the saddest things I've seen today. And believe me, I've seen a number of sad things today.
what's with the David Bowie references in the comments? i'm curious because if there were any actually IN THE FIND, i would probably notice. and,
Angie in space, you rock.
i love the phrasing "hurry up and do some physics"
chop chop pauly!
This person shows promise and potential. He/she should not have let her/him get away.
I think the font is comic sans, isn't it? Comic sans serif. But in this case it's comic sans comedy of any kind. Yet beautiful. I love the line about the cracked mirrors.
Hmm, I first read this thinking it must be copied from a book (a bad one) but maybe that's just because of the war reference and unlikely name, Pauly. It seems like a long-distance love letter, but then we're hit with the last line about breaking up. Whoever, whatever the situation it sounds sad, and feeling a little lovelorn myself at the moment it sounds even sadder. But if she is young, at least she has plenty of time to recover!
And thanks etymOlogist, I found your comment really interesting.
Well, yeah, I guess it's obvious I wrote that before I read the other comments. Everyone talking about comic sans.
etymOlogist, great lesson on objet trouvé! I think Dave E. Cakes has a good point -- an internet romance makes sense -- British language use, distance references, and the printout in comic sans. Also the science fiction references that make me think of those RP games my teenage daughter used to play. That's probably where they met.
Maybe someone said this and I missed it, but another British clue is the name "Pauly" -- I remember that's what the other Beatles called Paul sometimes.
Maybe, but I have a friend Paul, and we call him Pauly. Maybe a parent is British, and that's where the British influence came from.
Maybe she's a brit living in america. This makes me really sad, too. But she's probably better off without him. Hopefully she sees it in time.
Paul,
Run like you a** is on fire.
Dude
I am glad you enjoyed it foundlover in NZ, I did too. Lest you think, however, that I wrote the text, I must acknowledge the proper credit. I receive a daily "Word of the Day" email from Webster's Dictionary (m-w.com). This was the word for Aug. 28th. It naturally made me think of this site, so I thought I would pass it along.
Florida is a major British tourist destination, so it could be a British girl in Florida for the summer or just for a long "holiday." All the other language is British:
1. Rude meaning "naked" or "sexually oriented" is British.
2. Tonnes is a British spelling.
3. "Driving holiday" as pointed out above is British.
4. Ski-ing was pointed out above to be British.
The fact that she says "gallons" doesn't mean she isn't British. Even though officially everything is done in metric in Britain a lot of people there still think in terms of the old measurements. My friends and I were lost once in a small village in England, trying to find a pub. We stopped and asked a man walking down the street and he told us it was "around 100 yards down on the left."
Kdawg, what else would we say but ‘100 yards’? Although ‘*about* 100 yards’ rather than ‘around’, I would guess. (Thanks for coming – I hope you enjoyed the pub!) No one in UK uses metres or km. Distances are still feet and inches, yards, miles. Litres are for buying petrol, gallons (and pints) are for everything else (water, beer). We still compute car fuel economy in ‘miles per gallon’ even though this means some fiddly sums! (Oh, and our gallons are bigger than yours...) Weights (in street markets) are still often in pounds and ounces, though supermarkets do everything in kilos – a legal requirement. Older folks will still reckon money in ‘pounds, shillings and pence’ although the currency went metric 40 years ago.
I still maintain that 'tonnes' is not a British spelling, but maybe UK kids are taught 'metric tonnes' in junior school now? I agree with your 1, 3 and 4 though. British kids on holiday in Florida seems a very likely scenario to me, despite what I said before.
What were the circumstances of the Find? Had he read it and thrown it away? Or perhaps she drafted her note on the computer (in Comic Sans) before copying it out in authentically scrawly tear-stained handwriting? (Yes, I’ve done that too.)
Noooo!!! Pauly!! You can't dump me, we haven't made our rude video yet!!!
Just a quick note thought:
I have a six-year-old cousin who we call Pauly. if we would assume they were teens, i do believe 'pauly' here needs a new nickname. Just sayin'.
What's up with ski-ing?
comic sans is crap! everyone know to use Mr. Sirloin if you really want to get your point across. once at work, my boss shit-canned someone's scholarship application because their essay was is comic sans - true story! i can't believe nobody's said anything about her betterly grammer.
I'm sure it's already been pointed out, but I didn't get past the first line because of the misuse of "your." Oh, the pain of being a Grammar Nazi..
Can you not break-up until you have done all of those things?
No one ever told me that. If thats the case there are some people that owe me big time.
That made you chuckle? Born without a heart, were you? I thought it was cute and innocent until I reached the last paragraph. Then I saw that the letter was filled with pain.
perhaps its a letter never sent?
Yesterday I broke up with my own Pauly, who is headed to war next month. This girl wrote exactly what I feel. Exactly. I hope she gets her Pauly back.
I wish transporters were real too sweetheart.