November 29, 2008

I'm Not Too Fat to Fly
FOUND by ann in Sydney, Australia
Found at a girls' high school wedged under a table. Very cute, chubby bird flying amongst clouds... and the wonderful one-liner "have a nice life."
Clover in the clouds
Looks like Michael lost a good one. His loss.
+ November 29, 2008 12:05 AM +
Jan in Mike Mulligan's steamshovel
The illustration has a Virginia Lee Burton vibe but I didn't see "Michael, the Egotistical Bastard" among her list of published works.

http://www.houghtonmifflinbooks.com/features/m

+ November 29, 2008 12:41 AM +
Sara is in sleepyville
I like how mean she is.... "the egotisical bastard" .... "have a nice life" .... you can almost hear her say a**hole after that...
+ November 29, 2008 12:57 AM +
delicious soup in a bowl
Wow, this is really great! Especially when you compare it to the typical high school notes on this site.
+ November 29, 2008 01:33 AM +
Geek NOT in my mom's basement
What a cute bird. I hope Micheal is ashamed of himself, although I'd wager he probably isn't. A good Find for a Saturday morning.
+ November 29, 2008 02:20 AM +
Maddy is a L7
perhaps i read far too much into it, but what if it turns out michael was really worried about the person's weight in regards to flying; airline flying that is.

dang they have strict weight regulation limits today. what if mike was trying to sneak them on? hide them in the luggage?

*the bird is tres cute

+ November 29, 2008 03:38 AM +
echo in the valleys
"Too fat to fly" really sums up how I feel sometimes. Good on her!
+ November 29, 2008 03:54 AM +
ShaiGar in Darwin, Australia
How is she mean? She's wishing him a nice life, and she's calling him an egotistical bastard. There's a compliment if ever I heard one.

She's probably a porker.
+ November 29, 2008 04:32 AM +
baby basil in the herb garden
If this was found in a girls' highschool, obviously Michael never got it, unless he works there. (Which is creepy.) And it's a shame he didn't, it's a good note.

I too am not too fat to fly. We can all fly in our hearts, no matter what size. It's guys like Michael who can't be tall without cutting someone else's head off, who are the emotional dwarfs.

Not to mention asswholes.

I bet he told her that in order for him to accept her prom-date, she had to lose x number of pounds first.

He needs a life.
+ November 29, 2008 06:03 AM +
Mr Mojo Risin in Portage, IN.
John Madden on the other hand, is too fat to fly.....and won't.
+ November 29, 2008 07:59 AM +
a. in the Midwest
Yay for her. I'm years beyond high school, and I wish I had half of her self-esteem.

Fly, baby, fly.
+ November 29, 2008 09:29 AM +
gorgon in minneapolis
Well, I just fractured fifteen bones jumping off the garage roof. Don't know if fat is the problem, but I sure can't fly.
+ November 29, 2008 09:34 AM +
Dancing Queen stuck in the 70's
Mike has always been an "egg-a-tistical" bastard!

Girl, you need to just tell him before you fly you have to get laid!

@baby basil -- better to be an asswhole instead of a half ass! I always spell asshole that way! It's the best way to indicate someone is a TOTAL ass!!!
+ November 29, 2008 10:05 AM +
Hiplainsdrifter in South Portland, Maine
...yea but you're not phat enough to be fly for Michael

...PS Lay off the "Peeps" those little yellow birds ain't diet food....
+ November 29, 2008 10:33 AM +
not just another mouth in the lipstick vogue
What's that about P.R.I.D.E.?

Badass.
+ November 29, 2008 10:34 AM +
kwyncee in aere aedificare
michael, michael, michael... when she asks you, "does this make me look fat?" the answer is ALWAYS "no."

she should have got naked with him, pointed at his crotch, broken into hysterical laughter, gathered her clothes and walked out laughing the whole way. then start giggling every time she saw him from then on; if she could get her friends to laugh too, all the better.
+ November 29, 2008 10:48 AM +
Canary in the coal mine
I imagine that in Michael's world, she was good enough to f*ck, as long as she didn't tell anyone, and no one saw them together.. because she was "embarassingly" rotund. He just assumed that she'd always hang around, because she "needed" him..

Forget you, Michael. Plenty of fishies for that little Bird.



+ November 29, 2008 11:06 AM +
gorgon in minneapolis
@Kwyncee. My goal is to never have to answer the fat question again, so my most recent reply was "Compared to what?"

Yes, I'm lucky to be alive.
+ November 29, 2008 11:16 AM +
Librarian in the woodwork
Well then, go take a flying leap!

Have a nice day,
Michael
+ November 29, 2008 12:36 PM +
Blaze in KS
Right on, Birdie. Right on.
+ November 29, 2008 01:36 PM +
Kiki in Spring
...Too fat to ZIP my fly...
+ November 29, 2008 06:39 PM +
Night in gale
This is a sweet way to flip Michael the bird.
+ November 29, 2008 07:33 PM +
beth in cali
I LOVE THIS!
+ November 30, 2008 09:02 PM +
Charisma in San Diego
Dont get me wrong people. But I can relate to this note. I do Love my boyfriend, but sometimes he makes me feel he dosent have the same love towards me.

My boyfriends name is Michael.
He is also an egotistical bastard.
Everytime I feel I look good, he will always remind me that I have those extra pounds to loose. Im a size 7 he wants a size 1.

+ December 01, 2008 11:47 AM +
baby basil in the herb garden
@Charisma, start shopping for a new boyfriend. This is not going to get better. If it's not your weight, it'll be something else. He's the type that has to criticise you to feel "big" and superior. This is the beginning of a bad, bad deal. If he has to tear you down, he doesn't love you. I doubt he loves himself, either.

I had a friend in highschool who was a large (as in nearly 6 ft) woman. Yes, she was heavy, but her "boyfriend" kept putting off the wedding saying she should lose a few pounds. He said he was "doing it for her" so she'd "look beautiful." But no matter what, he was never happy with any changes. The wedding got put off, and put off, and put off...until she finally threw the ring in the sewer and moved on.
+ December 02, 2008 02:46 AM +
warren in 2141 represent
i love you ann
+ December 03, 2008 05:49 AM +

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