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April 22, 2008 |
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Drunk Tina's Drunk Friend's Car
FOUND by Fletcher Kauffman
in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
I had been crestfallen that I had thrown away my entire collection of finds some months earlier (mere weeks before discovering FOUND). I've hung onto it long enough, time to share.
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I Hate You April 27, 2007 |
The Perfect Note June 02, 2002 |
Help Wanted... April 25, 2007 |
Clean Friends ... July 17, 2007 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
so, drunk Tina and her friend are wandering through Pennsylvania? scary!
this is priceless.
Yeah, I found it on the street-- there was no car around, so maybe they came back for it later. I had submitted with a longer story-- I had literally just thrown away my lifelong collection of finds weeks before I found Found and I was sad about all those great finds in the trash somewhere. So, I was on a business trip in Pittsburgh and I walked down the street and saw this folded piece of paper on the sidewalk and I just had a feeling.
When I picked it up a looked, I'm pretty sure it brought a tear to my eye.
i'm glad to see people can have a good and drunk time yet still be responsible by not driving. i also like how it isn't "tina," but "drunk tina." like some kind of action figure/ super hero.
Bad enough to have been christened Tina, to then become known as Drunk Tina is just awful.
This must be Substance Abuse Week on Found.
Or Substance Abuse Month, as we're into our second week.
They've gotten all the mileage they can out of grass--on to pills and booze!
what could drunk tina's friend do but join her in drunkenness? anything else would have been just plain rude. i assume 'C' was also drunk so she could not drive drunk tina's drunk friend's car either. a longer note explaining that would have been out of the question.
I like how "C" signs with xoxo - as if to say, "Dear Joe, I know my friends are drunks, but you still love me, right? Because it's obvious I love you"
Also, I like how "C" used also instead of too (she got drunk also...)
This is a great find...
Must be something about the name Tina. I know two drunk Tina's. They could both also be named 'drunk, crackhead Tina' and neither has a legal driver's license. hmmmm
While "C" was good enough to explain to Joe just whose car it was, she didn't really explain how drunk Tina's drunk friend got the car into his living room in the first place.
Ahh the memories. I used to bartend and we had a lot of cars that would "get drunk". It wasn't the people but the cars who were drunk.
"I know you know that I know you know that Drunk Tina's drunk friend is drunk me."
C thought ahead in an attempt to stave off the angry "you park like a jerk" note that Joe would most likely have left on Drunk Tina’s Drunk Friend's windshield when he found her car on his lawn in the morning.
I’m not sure which is worse: Being known as “Drunk Tina,” or being known as “Drunk Tina’s Friend”…
At least the note doesn’t read: “Joe, This is Drunk Tina’s friend. She got drunk also and we had to leave her here. Thanks, C. Xoxo.”
Cars can eventually be towed, but drunken strangers passed out on your sofa (seem to) last a lifetime.
Wonder how they all got to where they needed to be with all the drunks cars still parked. Betcha they picked up some guys, and a good time was had by all, untill they realized someone needed to remember where the fricking cars were. Whatta pain in the butt that is.. not that I'd ever know, or anything... umm.. yeah..
I wonder if C. and Joe know a Sober Tina.
I once had a friend who volunteered to be our designated driver, only to be discovered wasted and dribbling in the downstairs bathroom at the end of the night. We were forced to walk over five miles back to our dormitory, and by the time we got there most of us were starting to feel hangover and seriously unhappy. He was still so soppy that two of the boys needed to carry him up the stairs, and in a fit of pique we dumped him in the hall outside his door and didn't notify his roommate.
I have heard a rumor that at some point he wet himself spectacularly and was awakened by people stepping over him to get to class, and I know for a fact that everyone refused to drive him back to pick his car up.
Maybe there were many Tinas that night, and the drunk one had to be distinguished from the rest. You know, silly Tina and blond Tina, and drunk Tina.
I do that with my friends, cuz I know so many Joshs. Hungry Josh, Hat Josh, Chess Josh, Opinions Josh, RD Josh, Mustashio Josh, Quiet Josh, Asian Josh... the list goes on.
I'm sad this guy threw out all his old finds. What a waste! Good thing he found Found though, so he can keep them all from now on
My Name's Talking Tina, and I'm Going to Kill You!!!
@Beth--You know MORE than 8 people named Josh? That's pretty wild....
mlm, Beth's Joshs are really one person. She is describing these other Joshs that appear after Drunk Josh gets hammed.
For those who have had friends volunteer to be designated driver, then they proceed to drink and misbehave: shave off their eyebrows, write notes to them all over their face with a Sharpie, and never invite them anywhere again until they pledge to behave. Then handcuff them to the steering wheel while you go in and party. That way they'll be less likely to find booze before they have to drive you home. It's so annoying.
Turbo--and, apparently, one of them becomes Asian! (You and Flargy always make me crack up!)
I went to high school with a girl later known as Incest Tina. After her mother died, she married a man who was a friend of the family. Amid whispers from other family members about her mother's past relationship with her new husband, they had DNA tests done, and it turned out he was her biological father. Yikes!
mlm, I aim to please. I can't speak for Turbo, but I bet that's what (s)he aims for too.
I love Pittsburgh. Yes, you read that correctly. I guess it helps that I have a bunch of friends there who I met while playing in bands over the years. On one of my bands' many trips there, four of the five band members conspired to find a way to NOT bring a Tina to Pittsburgh with us. She was the girlfriend of the fifth guy, and someone you REALLY wouldn't want to spend 8 hours in a van with. I think we ended up just bringing extra stuff with us to take up the room that she could have sat in.
You gotta aim for somethin'...
My experience in bands has always led me to believe that girlfriends feel they have some sort of "right" to be the merch girl and mad when they can't go one the road. There is a reason for this. More than likely, everyone else in the band hates you (as stated above). Secondly, it's hard to get laid by a different girl every night with you hanging around all the time. And you have to pee all the time.
You thought the GF wanted to go on the road to be with you? She really wanted to go on the road so she could be with the other member of the band that she was sleeping with, usually the drummer. Those boys can F@#k.
Guess I'll have to be the grammar police today. The note should read: "This is Drunk Tina's friend's car."
@ Effie in Oxfordshire , don't understand your problem with the name Tina, it seems like a perfectly good name to me.Besides someone named Effie shouldn't be criticizing someone else's name:)
Sorry about that, it had to be said, I actually thinks Effie's a pretty cool name. What's it short for?
Brain Problem...NO! NO! NO! I was the drummer! You're grossing me out! I won't dispute your statements as to drummers' capabilities, but some of us actually use discretion as well. Eww.
Flargy, you act like your gagging, but you're really blushing....
...and dreaming of Tina!
Last time I got drunk & left my car is cast me $160 dollars. That put an end to my 'Drunk & Hot Girl' nights. Thank You Hollywood.
Just another T in a...I got it, at least! Too funny!
I'm truly glad to know that SOME people don't drink and drive.
I'm thinking that Joe was the one who graciously drove all the drunks home that night(I'm sure it was out of his way) but 'C' had to prove to him that they did have a car and they were planning to get driven home by a DD.
However, that didn't pan out.
Also, I think Christina is a beautiful name. Even when people just say Tina for short. It's an honour to be named after CHRIST.
I dislike it when people write with an "X", though.
We shouldn't be exxing out CHRISTS' name or in CHRISTMAS either.
Xmas or Xina...just downright-wrong!
Holly, it's not exxing out. X is just not an English word and by the same token, neither is mas. The meaning behind the X is rather interesting and all over the internet. I'm not promising it will make you like it anymore, can't say that I like it myself--just saying it's interesting.
@turbo - - i think i might be in love with your hilarious honesty.
I dated a 'musician' for a long time, but sadly very stereotypical cheater. funny though, the rest of the band members enjoyed my company and were sad to see the break up occur.
is that weird?
... and side note, i wasn't sleeping with any of the other members of the band... lol sorry if that is disappointing.
@ TERRIE- I hear ya'! I guess you're right!
Holly, I guess you were named after Christmas too? ;-)
Wikipedia has an entry on 'Xmas' -- apparently the abbreviation goes back to early use of Greek letter X = Ch. It also says:
'This abbreviation is widely used but not universally accepted. Many do not know about its antiquity and believe it to be of commercial origin and thus demeaning to Christ, whilst others find it a helpful abbreviation.'
Useful for early Christians when secrecy was required, like the 'fish' logo. I agree, I find it vaguely disturbing -- don't know how I'd feel if my name were Christina though. Proably I'd think 'Xtina' was quite a sexy thing to be called.
if this note came from Nevada, i'd know exactly who drunk tina would be. unless she's moved since high school...