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October 30, 2008 |
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Love Tess
FOUND by J.M.
in Peace River, Alberta, Canada
I found this on he street in front of a liquor store. I found it a few years ago but I kept it in my wallet. It seems really desperate to me.
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Fine Ass Babes April 08, 2006 |
A Straight Nooner October 22, 2005 |
Aw Yeah April 28, 2007 |
This Fruit Meal March 23, 2006 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
desperate, yes. and also a request to be naked.
Bleck. It does ooze desperation.
Liquor store? Drunken desperation!
"I love you man!"
@the man behind the curtain;
no a request to be naked would have ended with "I will do anything TO you".
"Yes, you are extremely bloody trying!"
Also, it's NOT "just because"; it's that he really screwed up AGAIN and has to apologize AGAIN and has to promise things will be better AGAIN.
When the guy who wrote the card discovered that his beloved had just gone south to Seattle in order to create heaven on earth with some software meister at a cafe, he traded the flowers for a fifth of whiskey and tried to drown his troubles ... AGAIN.
He's not getting bare with anyone tonight.
It makes perfect sense-- the girl gets the flowers, throws them in the trash, but keeps the card, then heads to the liquor store to get herself some Merlot while she ponders what to do about that jerk. This could also have been Found in the frozen food section next to a display of Ben and Jerry's.
However, the handwriting does seem a little feminine; it's very rounded. I wonder if things are the other way 'round?
no way that's a guy's handwriting. it looks exactly like mine (especially the lower case 'a').
she's got some sort of addiction problem (alcohol, drugs, sex with other guys?) and she's trying really hard to stop. she gives him flowers with a card expressing her internal struggle (because that's what she would expect from an apologetic lover).
he can't take it anymore and goes to a liquor store. perhaps he wants to drink and forget. perhaps she struggles with alcohol and he wants to ply her with an unresistable temptation which will lead to her ultimate misery and failure. once she fails again, he'll leave her and tell her it's all her fault.
Please bare with WHAT?
Hilary is bang on; this is not a man's handwriting - no way, no how.
This is a co-dependent late-teen/20-something female that has a sense of self-worth that's microscopic. Her life as a doormat will continue until it hurts enough to make changes to correct whatever problems caused her to hate and degrade herself so much.
Good luck, chickie, you're going to need it.
And, by the way, who's Tess?
why does everyone almost always assume that the guy is the 'bad one' in the relationship and the female is the one you should feel sorry for?
@ girl, hilary & grumpy ... around these parts if you phone in your order to the florist (or email it etc.) then the clerk on duty writes your message on the card. Could be a girl. Could be a guy. Could be someone who isn't sure. Either way, it isn't your beloved's handwriting on the card unless beloved actually walks into the florist. And if this flower giver is really a jerk, I don't think he/she went to the trouble.
Librarian:
i can't imagine that someone would phone that message in to a florist.
i also can't imagine that a florist would do such a poor job of writing the message on the card.
it's always possible that it is the florist's handwriting, but i'm going to stick with the assumption that the female is the one who wrote the card.
maybe she just picked up a free card at a grocery store sans flowers, or maybe - as i supposed in my previous post - she bought flowers because that's what she would expect if roles were reversed.
it's also possible that i have a stupidly huge project due very soon and i just realized i made a fatal error in its early design and so, mind not yet ready to tackle the everest that is my poorly designed project, i am thinking Way. Too. Hard. about a bit of paper found on the ground outside a liquor store somewhere in Canada.
Response:
Anything? Oh... OK.
First off - bend over I'm lacking a vase and need a need a place to keep these flowers for the weekend.... Now make 2 OK signs with your fingers place and them over your eyes... and then stand still while I place a Twinkie in your mouth (tich tich don't bite down!) Right then .. don't move an inch while I run down to the liquor store... be back in a jiffy.
Who's Tess?
I stand by my original assessment of the note and the writer.
It is hard to believe that a man's brain has ever in the history of the world put together the words "Please bare with I am really trying & I will do anything for you."
@Hiplainsddrifter: that's a brilliant picture you've painted for us. She did say "anything" didn't she?
I am.
Effie, we're all waiting for it . . .
Don't make me say it . . .
Oh, alright:
. . . IN BED!
i absolutely love how fundamentally misunderstood the purpose of the "just because" card is in this find.
Just because...
i dont think i'm actually worth anything
or actually mean anything to myself
i'm willing to debase myself
just so you can keep me around
and ignore me some more.
Okay, so maybe the poor loser phoned the florist, ordered some flowers, and the clerk asked "shall we send along a card?"
Loser: Um, sure, that sounds great. What's that add to the cost?
Clerk: Oh, nothing. They're free.
Loser: Great. Do that. She'll like it.
Clerk: So ... what should I put on the card?
Loser: Huh? Oh, I'm sorry. Uh, I don't know. I just love her a lot and really think I screwed up this time royally. [sniff, sniff, as the emotion overwhelms him] Bear with me a minute here.
Clerk: [bored] Anything else?
Loser: Yeah, hold on. I'm really trying to come up with something she'll like. I'll do anything for her, you see.
Clerk: [after another long pause] Can I put you on hold? [Clerk puts loser on hold, scribbles some notes on a random nearby card, heads off to help a real live walk-in customer. When she gets back to the phone half an hour later, loser has hung up. So she just sticks her notes with the flowers and has Bruno load them in the truck for delivery.]
...but I won't do that.
Today's FINDS both invoke old songs- one from the 80s and one from the early 90s. Is that enough to claim there's a theme?
The card probably says "to Tess" on the other side, which means either a guy ordered the flowers and the bored florist lady wrote the note, or Tess is a lesbian. Hmmm, tough call.
it would probably say "love, Tess" on the reverse, not "To Tess." Either that or the universe has gone wonky again, and the wrong title has appeared with this Find. You never know.
Maybe it has something to do with a tesseract.
It's been a while since I read "Tess of the d'Urbervilles: A Pure Woman Faithfully Presented" by Thomas Hardy ... and I don't remember a thing about the plot or characters ... but is the Finder so literarily minded that he/she thought Tess of the d'U could have written the note? Any English majors out there want to help?
I love Bruno with all of my heart!
its entirely possible that this has everything to do with a tesseract.
Nice try, Librarian, but still no sale. The words have yet to be formulated that will convince me that this was a message from a man.
@grumpy:
i agree with your statement and i would add: or written by an illiterate and sloppy florist.
I think its a girl who has screwed up. I have gotten alot of letters, notes, cards etc... like this from an ex until I got tired of her BS.
@Librarian It's quite possible that a 21st century Tess of the D'Urbervilles could have written this note. The basic plot of the book is this: a milkmaid (our heroine,Tess) is seduced by one man, married and rejected by another man and Tess eventually murders the first man. So this note could have been written by Tess in desperation to the man whom she married, in order to save the marriage.
Sounds like a woman to me - probably in love with a married man, that's why she's a drunk
I'm so curious about the "I am really trying" part. Trying to forgive and forget his/her affair? Trying to stop the bad habit? What else is there?
this one reminds me of http://www/foundmagazine.com/comments/531
(Holy cow.. at first I thought that one was addressed to Tess. But no. It's Tina.)
and
http://foundmagazine.com/comments/380
rolling around naked in the archives
this one reminds me of http://www/foundmagazine.com/comments/531
(Holy cow.. at first I thought that one was addressed to Tess. But no. It's Tina.)
and
http://foundmagazine.com/comments/380
????????????????????????
what do you mean?
Penelope, what's confusing about what rolling means? S/He means that this find reminds him/her of the finds at those other two URLs. Kind of obvious...
(First link's got a / instead of a . by the way)
Penelope, why did you c&p that entire post? I don't get it.