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December 06, 2008 |
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PLEASE Do Not Smoke in This Car. Dad
FOUND by Tim Barrett
in Lafayette, California
Found in a puddle in the Safeway parking lot.
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A Day in the Life ... July 27, 2007 |
Cowboy Eyes May 27, 2007 |
Tender and Sweet April 19, 2006 |
I Put a Curse January 21, 2006 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
Yeah, you smoking hot wife of that guy who can't wait to adopt a baby. Hmmph.
Wow, what a disciplinarian. You tell 'em, dad.
Foul Daddy's new Buick and he'll tan yer behind!
Ah, the memories...I immediately thought of my brother's first car back in the 70's with one of those then bran-spankin-new digital clocks with the setting buttons in the front. After having his many dates reset the clock to their liking, he finally posted a DYMO-tape message in all-caps that said, "Keep your damn hands off my clock!!"
I like to evnision how a small edit can change the message. In this case, imagine that's not a period after "car" but a comma.
Also imagine that I spelled "envision" correctly.
Dad also says: Please do not fart in here, either.
Geek, the comma would make this find awesome.
baby basil, my dirty little mind keeps taking the "L" out of the last word...
It's weird how Dad's handwriting got so poor when he was signing the note- he nailed the A in Please and car.. but the A in Dad leaves something to be desired. (ditto the ending D.)
i agree with fooch. which means i agree with geek.
although, the kids better listen and obey 'cause their dad is zorro... check out the "z" under the "PLEASE"
Hopefully this was taped on a
5 gallon gas can that was leaking.
Other things Dad doesn't want you doing in his car:
No eating ...
No drag racing and crashing into a tree, a guardrail or some other dad's car driven by a hormone filled dumbass teen before I've made the final payment on said car!
No taking your geeky friends to the "cool kids"
house for a party and then getting so drunk that one of your friends vomits on my backseat and all over the doors while you continues to drive a zillion miles an hour on a side road!
No "pretending" that my car has run out of gas on a quiet back road (Seriously! Can't you come up with something more original than this! My Grandfather's grandfather pulled this lame stunt with his girlfriend and even his girl didn't believe him, yet she let him get to 2nd base anyway.God, she was such a whore!)so that you can try to get into your girlfriend's pants and leave a sticky wet spot on my upholstery.
No borrowing the car; driving 500 miles in one night (where the hell do you go anyway!) and then not filling up the gas tank before you bring it home!
No wearing out my tires by doing figure-eights in the high school parking lot.
No allowing your older friend, who "graduated"
five years ago but who still hangs out with High schoolers, and whom I have heard on good authority, sells marijuana to 1/2 the school, to drive my car ever! Especially when said "friend" is stoned and or has just gotten over a 3 day bender.
No driving my car with the parking brake engaged, I don't accept that you "just forgot", maybe I'll "just forget" to pay for heating your bedroom, how would you like that, huh?
No dirty shoes allowed in my car. Wipe your feet and tell your filthy friends to wipe theirs.
"..I remember every little thing, as if it happened only yesterday. We were parking by the lake, there was not another car in sight.."
Kwyncee, that's not a Z under the PLEASE.. it's a greater than/equal to symbol.
Daaayyum, Smallbear.. do you have teenaged boys? (or are you culling from your own teenage years?) pretty vivid, concise list. (Holy cow, I dread my young'uns' upcoming teen years. *shudder*)
Hey Cubby, what kind of car does your Dad have that gets 500 miles to a tank of gas? That's awesome! If my Dad had a car that registered a zillion miles per hour, I'd have to try it once. 8-)
Please don't spill the bong water, either. And don't you ever change it? Ewww!
Dad
eew indeed! Just the thought of the smell of narsty old bongwater makes me wanna hurl.
How did my parents avoid me making any mistakes such as the above-mentioned in their car? They simply refused to let me get a license, drive a car, or take me anywhere, for that matter. Worked perfectly!
@barely seventeen, Nope no kids and this isn't based on experience either (my teenage years were dull, actually) just good observational skills and a good imagination. :)
Nightingale, My Dad's car is of course the Batmobile! :-)
I'm thinking most kids would go 'well, yeah, dad, no problem-o! [I'll just hold my cigarette out the window, then it won't be IN the car.]'
Note to dad: drop the 'Please'. It makes you sound like a whiner.
Seriously Dad, why are you ASKING them not to smoke in the car? You sound like that tired mom in store begging her kids to be good and then shoving their mouths full of sweets to get them to comply. Stop begging, start ordering. A few "no"s are good for them.