 |
August 13, 2007 |
|
 |
|
|
Lifeguard's Reward
FOUND by Scott Bramwell
in Bedlington, Northumberland, UK
I found this tucked inside a library book at the library where I work.
Sign in or register to start a profile and keep track of your comments. You may also post without creating a profile, but you'll have to answer some tough spam protection questions.
I Made Chili ... January 17, 2008 |
Abandoned Bbq August 30, 2005 |
To Take This Pill May 22, 2005 |
Pop Man February 01, 2007 |
 |
|
 |
         |
We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
Wow, a whole drink?! Way to go, big spenders! And a real classy way to thank the guy who saved your daughter's life. Nothing says "debt of gratitude" like the back of a used envelope with a smiley face drawn on it.
With all the skepticism about the authenticity of recent finds, all I can say is that I hope this one is fake. If not, then there are a couple of world-class douchebags out there named Clare and Michael who could stand to learn a thing or two about appreciating heroic deeds.
Aw, good on you Andy. Clare and Michael: is your daughter's life worth just a drink?
The little smiley face expresses so well the relief that Clare and Michael must have felt when their daughter didn't drown. Also, I wonder how much money was really in that envelope. Was the tip included? I hope the lifeguard waited until after his shift to have that drink.
That's CLOVER in the lawn...
Come on, people. I think that either A) there was more money in the envelope and she was being cute, or B) he didn't really save the girl's life--he could have given her sunblock for all we know.
I think it's genuine, and that there was a hefty sum of money in the envelope. Or at least $50, $100?
Anyway, the whole idea of being a lifeguard is you don't do it for the money – they didn't have to give him anything! He'd appreciate anything - even a note would be much appreciated by the lifeguards I know!
Mandy has a point, we shouldn't judge so swiftly (although I did), there may have been way more money than the note implied. However, if Andy were a lifeguard then he was doing what was part of the job and he shouldn't expect any money.
I bet he lets the next drowning kid sink.
Andy wouldn't be doing it for the money, if I was doing his job I'd be plenty happy with just a thank you. I don't think the parents are bad people at all.
Man, I wish someone would have bought me a drink when I was a lifeguard - I saved lots of lives! I was lucky if I didn't get yelled at for jumping in after poor little pwecious while the parents were sitting on the side of the pool doing their nails.
In all seriousness, though, I would have never expected anything like this. The city paid for me to rescue their child, after all! Plus some pools get really funny about patrons giving gifts to lifeguards at all! (Not that we didn't take them, of course...)
What the world needs now is more drunk lifeguards.
I USED TO BE A LIFEGUARD, TOO. I WAS EMPLOYED AT THE MAJOR WATER PARK IN THE DFW AREA. ONLY TWO KIDS DROWNED ON MY HANDS OUT OF A TWO YEAR LIFE GUARDING CAREER. LUCKILY, I COULD ALWAYS AFFORD MY OWN DRINKS.
the gift obviously meant enough to the lifeguard that s/he used it as a bookmark after the fact. granted, s/he left it in the book, but the envelope wasn't immediately tossed out, and that's important.
i am also of the mind that any lifeguard would appreciate any gift. and maybe the parents know the lifeguard and have seen her/him out at the bar a time or two?
I'm from where that was found, It's British humour! I bet Andy is not a real lifeguard too. Who whould write that if they were handing it in to where he worked? It's obviously a joke! At least the saving the life bit is. No-one would write that if it was real. Thats our humour!- you lot are all taking it far too seriously!!
A DRINK?!!! That's it ? When I got saved my Dad bought him a Rolex and a new rod and reel !
Hey Andy~
Is that a BabyRuth bar in the pool?
I agree with Mandy... I don't think Andy actually saved Clare and Micheal's daughter... I think he helped her in some small way... at least I HOPE that's the case!
lol.. in order to believe humanity isn't as base as to think that money makes up for saving someone's life, i need to think that it's something as silly as providing her sunscreen.
god i hope so.
You have to remember this could be a very traumatic few minutes. You don't think what an appropriate tip for saving a life would be right after that event. Sure they knew a life is worth more than a drink, but perhaps that's all the cash on hand at the moment. The adrenaline wears off, the kid is ok, Andy has gone home, you're at the beach/pool, your good stationery is at home ... it seems perfectly appropriate to leave this note.
Mona, did you look at yesterday's find?
Oh , it's not all about money . My Dad wasn't rich . It wasn't even the lifeguard that saved me , he was busy with a bevy of blondes . It was a surf fisherman , and he lost his rod and reel saving me from riptide . ( The lifeguard was fired . )
My family left that for SALTY. Regarding the value of a human life, it's all we felt SALTY was worth.
Such is life in Lubbock.
yes, Clover i did. Not sure why you asked, tho.
Hmmmm....now, how do we know the note wasn't orginally attached to a really nice gift - say, a case of beer or fine champaigne? Or in a little envelope on a bar stool....at his very own mini bar set?
Okay, okay...perhaps I do watch a little too much of American TV (Price Is Right)...
I'd like to think that they gave him something really special, but honestly, when it comes to situations like that, everyone has an expectation of how they think people 'should' react...and it always falls short.
I'm glad the child was saved...that was/is after all, the lifeguard's primary job, no?
LUBBOCK IS NOT ANYWHERE NEAR THE DFW AREA. UTILIZE THE INTERNET:
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=TEXAS
I'm with Flargy. You hit it dead on.
Georgina, Ok, people joke - individually. Who makes bad jokes and signs both names? Yech!
I'm thinking it was a gift card. What lifeguard is legal drinking age? Or maybe it was taped to a cool bottle of Aquafina.
this site has turned into such a ninny sewing circle.
the assumptions you all make never cease to amaze me.
just because the envelope says "have a drink on us" says nothing of the contents. it could have been figurative... tongue in cheek. wink wink. i'm sure more than 4$ was in there.
But how much is gratitude worth? Is it as much as you have? Or as much will impress idiots on a website?
50$? 100$? 1000$?
I know if someone saved me I'd be humbled, and gracious, but Lord knows I don't have 100$ to give out...
(to Mona) Because I thought you would like it. I did.
It is nice that they gave him anything. People shouldn't expect to be rewarded for doing their job. That is what the paycheck is for.
Rock on Life Guard. You're doing your job. I always wanted to be a life guard.
i did like it, Clover. thanks for asking
It was after midnight, and I didn't even make the connection between the envelope and whatever reward there may have been. Still, they could very well be the type of assholes I described above (simply based on the astonishing number of assholes I encounter on a daily basis).
Of course, I'm an asshole too, but I personally feel that I'm of a better breed of asshole than most other assholes. I like to think that I have a natural flair for it, and I've taken that flair and polished it into a very unique style. That's right, VERY unique. I can qualify the word "unique" all day long, as long as it will piss of that dick that got all indignant about it being wrong.
So even if I was wrong, I still enjoyed writing my scathing criticism of Clare and Michael. Besides, those two clowns probably deserve a good bashing for some other stupid shit they've done.
THAT'S RIGHT, FLARGY, YOU JUSTIFY THE HELL OUT OF THE COMMENT. WE love READING YOUR NOVELETTES HERE ON THE FOUND COMMENT BOARD
When I was 10, I jumped into a pool to save a 2 year old girl (she was one of triplets and couldn't wait her turn while the other two were in the pool with the parents). I watched her impatience and approach to the edge. She went in over the side and promptly started to flail and sink. Nobody noticed. I dove in and saved her, pushed her to the edge and plopped her over onto the side. She was crying hysterically, the parents came over, etc etc. NOT ONE WORD OF THANKS TO ME. Not one. And here I was, thinking I was a mini-hero of the day.
My only explanantion is DENIAL. I think the parents could not even begin to imagine what COULD have happened due to their negligence, and therefore were not able to appreciate what someone else did to rectify the situation.
I'm still a smidge peeved I guess, if I can remember that 27 years later!
I would be SO grateful if someone saved me, but I'd have no way to express my gratitude if someone saved my CHILD...which is what this note says...
The lifeguard was doing their job & that is to be commended.
I don't know how you begin to properly thank someone for saving a life.
If you do it for rewards or praise, then I think you have issues.
But, we as a spoiled society, do tend to 'expect' something for everything...from winning a game, losing a game, tripping on the sidewalk or in this case - saving a life.
I'd like to know what this note was orginally attached to...
Whoaa.....heavy circumstances, but strangely light note.
This is an odd find for sure.
I'd sure some more information, but that doesn't usually come with a random find.
I'm glad the little girl is okay.
Oh and yeah...it's from the UK, so the legal drinking age is younger than the USA right? So, that would explain if it was alcohol.
I too think it was probably a joke...perhaps in reference to a beach themed party, i could picture a college student scrawling this note as a joke, drunken friends laughing. Perhaps the next day said student was studying for a big test, and left his joke, out of context for someone to find and over analyze the way we do the best.
I imagine a conversation between Michael and Clare that might go a little something like this:
CLARE: So, do you think that’s enough?
MICHAEL: Well, I don’t know. What’s 15% of the value of Chloe’s life?
CLARE: 15%? He gave her mouth-to-mouth for god’s sake!
MICHAEL: Yeah, well I saw the way you were looking at him. Maybe you’d like to give HIM mouth-to-mouth.
CLARE: Yeah and maybe I’d like to suck Andy’s dick while I’m at it.
MICHAEL: Be my guest! SLUT!
CLARE: JACKASS. Give me that fucking envelope....
unworthy... that is too funny.
I don't know what's real or fake anymore...but I do know my own laughter (thanks Unworthy)when I hear it.
Strange find. Americans take it too seriously? Well, we've found if we don't things can get legal and messy.
I guess it could be British humor, now that I read it w/that in mind.
Oh hell, I don't know....it's 'strange' - that's all I will say. Odd. Strange find.
Tips like that always rule. I used to get tips from people at Kinko's and they would tell me to go buy a drink or two on them. Makes me smile, Andy deserves it.
No wonder he stuck it in a library book.
Hey Still Bummed-- Good job! P.S. I love Asheville. I got engaged there!
As for thanking someone who has saved the life of our child.. I don't think there's any way to do it. When words fail, token gestures have to suffice.
Unworthy, you are SOOOOOO worthy! In all that cacophony, your post rules. Wonder if SALT likes your short, skirted swimsuit.
Sean S, I am wondering if you ever had occasion to save someone's child from a color copy machine? (yipe! those things can be dangerous.)
I would bet Andy's reward money that Salt would prefer a thong.
THERE'S NO INNOCENCE IN A THONG. SOMETIMES THAT'S OK. MORE OFTEN THAN NOT, IT ISN'T
So we'll split it 50/50?
mabey their daughter ws like 16 yrs old and she perposley drowned because she wanted to be saved and given mouth to mouth by the hot lifeguard, Andy, but the parents were just to stupid to relize what was really going on.
I SUGGEST 17/83
I'll take it. Lol
How about if Mom and Dad walked in on Andy giving their daughter a little "mouth to mouth" and this is their good natured way of smoothing things over? Maybe Andy isn't a true lifeguard at all and this is an inside joke?
I have an even better idea. It wasn't saving her life mouth to mouth wise at all. The girl was about to kill herself in the girl's bathroom when in walks Andy the Lifegaurd. Andy was of course not supposed to be there but he was supposed to meet Cindy there and well... the door was locked... Anyway, Cindy was late as usual but Andy heard some strange noises coming from the toilet and when he asked if she was all right he unwittingly go himself tangled up into her suicide attempt. In the end she fell head over heels in love with Andy and her pathetic attempt at suicide (it was just to get attention to get her parents to take her home from this lameass vacation) was averted thanks to Andy. Now their daughter spends all the time down at the pool bugging Andy instead of bothering her parents and whining about there not being any good entertainment and that she wants to see her friends. I think that'd be worth a drink.
Not nearly as much as we LOVE reading your multiple serial installments every day, SALT.
IF IT BOTHERS YOU SO, ASK THE OTHER FOUND REGULARS TO STOP INTERACTING WITH ME. THEY PROBABLY WON'T SO I AM MORALLY OBLIGATED TO RESPOND TO MY SPECIAL INTERNET FRIENDS. THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO REASON TO BE JEALOUS. DON'T LET YOUR EMOTIONS GET OUT OF CONTROL. I THOUGHT YOU WERE A MAN
SALT, honey, I was being serious. Why are you so defensive? Do you think maybe you need to talk to someone? I can give you some names.
And for the record, you thought right - I am a man. Does it make you uncomfortable that a man just called you "honey"?
Creeps me out a lil bit, Flarge.
ditto.
It's on !
I work as a lifeguard and I get paid the same thing as a cashier at Panera. Not complaining though, it's a good job..but we NEVER get thank-you notes like this and we definitely don't earn tips, so I think if I were Andy I'd be grateful for $5. He probably just pulled the kid out of the water anyway.
CONDESCENDING TERMS OF ENDEARMENT ARE A CHEAP RETORT AND ARE defensive IN NATURE, SO NO, IT DOESN'T MAKE ME FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE. IT ENFORCES MY SUPERIORITY
eh, maybe some daughters aren't worth that much alive.
Dear Andy, Please get drunk so that next time our daughter starts drowning, you're too wasted to do your job. We just got her a big life insurance policy and would sure love a new addition and a vacation, and at some point she's likely to learn how to swim.
-Clare and Michael :)
then again, all I could think of was an ex of mine who always claimed he "saved my life" from whatever horrible fate I would have had, had he not come along to rescue me. I can picture my mom writing a snarky note phrased identically like this to him.
I want to live in a land of SALT and HONEY
Maybe one of Salt’s “special internet <cough> friends” should take the time to caution him that any guy who continuously needs to announce his own sense of self-worth and importance by shouting it via his cap-lock key is really just continually announcing to the internet that he has a wee bit of a self-esteem problem…you know – in one particular area. I’m just sayin’ – seems to me all the guys I’ve met who were the most boastful always had the least to boast about…
Dear SALT,
it has come to my attention that several people on the internet seem to believe that you have a teeny, tiny pee pee, and that you compensate for said teeny, tiny pee pee with a CAPS LOCK.
Please take this into consideration, and post pictures of yourself on the internet, or provide links to photographic evidence of your masculine superiority. We look forward to seeing much more of you in the future.
Best regards,
Special Internet Friend.
Too bad for you, Stirring the Pot. All the guys I've known were hung like horses.
Im with stirr in a g pot.. well said. As for SALT get off your high horse.
Oh, what I missed today and just because I had to get my eyes examined! (and i then felt compelled to go buy retro glasses frames for my new prescription.)
I'm laughing audibly as I'm reading this, making my mate very curious. Starting with Unworthy's mathematical breakdown of this life-and-death event ... omg this is so FUNNY! Now I will go share... hehe!!
Never in Lost, That's an excellent example of how Found items can be used as writing prompts in English class!
Interestingly, I was referring to Salt’s self-esteem issues in regards to the size of his *vocabulary*, or the lack thereof… But obviously some of you took this in a whole different direction, which I think might mean that perhaps I merely typed what others had been thinking??
I guess my point was made after all…
I want to thank Unworthy for correctly making the distinction between "hung" and "hanged." The victim of a lynch mob, for instance, is hanged. Whether or not he was also hung is usually known only to his closest friends.
I want to thank Unworthy for so many other things as well, especially her pajama comment, but I don't want to seem untoward.
Despite my being an overweight Icelandic wiccan musician from Mexico and wearing a swan costume, I like to think of myself as one of SALT's special internet friends. At the risk of repeating myself, SALT is a FIND. Enjoy his magnificence!
(I'm having trouble with the spam protection today. When asked, "What is the opposite of bad?" I typed in "Flargy!" and it didn't accept my answer.)
Dear Midlife,
I hope someone will draw this image of you, so vivid, so enticing: "overweight Icelandic wiccan musician from Mexico and wearing a swan costume"
and then leave it in a book or at a bus stop, so someone can find it and then send it to Found!
MIDLIFE: HAH
Crisis, you are certainly welcome, but I beg to differ. I think you very much wish to seem toward (or something like that.) I'm so pleased my pajama crack didn't go unnoticed, so to speak.
And I'm living proof that you don't have to be worthy of HIS seed to be one of his special internet friends. You are regularly pretty fucking magnificent yourself, old man.
PS-I know hung.
I don't see any problem with this note, even if real. Chrome is right. I think some of YOU guys are the ones putting prices on lives, NOT Clare and Michael! Of COURSE they did not send the note to "pay" for her life! They just wanted Andy to know that he was appreciated, as they were undoubtedly focused mostly on the girl at the actual event.
When I was 10 I started choking on a pickled beet during social studies (I know, strange kid). Ms Monette saved my life and my parents found themselves in what I think is a similar situation: how does one thank someone for saving someone's life? My mother wrote a thank-you card and sent it along with a gift, which must have been pretty forgettable because... I can't remember it. Anyway, I think, as others have said, that it is Andy's job, as a lifeguard, to save lives. He is paid by the pool or beach or whatever to make sure nobody dies. And also, what sort of present would really be appropriate in this situation? A new car? A private jet plane? I think it's quite nice and would have been thrilled if I were Andy. As for the post about the British humor... I'm British and that really has little to do with anything.
I don't think the note was left for an 'actual' lifesaver. More for somebody who did something kind for her.
Either way they are recognizing his efforts, the amount of money that may or may not have been in the envelope is irrelevant.
I would say the envelope was attached to a nice bottle of scotch or something like that.
To the Found Regulars: Why oh why can't you just ignore SALT & not feed into his ego?
Here's an idea: stick to the FIND.
Things seem to be so much better here when you do.
Write about the find. Even if it's a novella. It was begun as a result of the FIND...not some idiot & his minions & sycophants.
People like that are a dime a dozen & they need something they are obviously trying to get from a fun site.
This is not a forum.
Oh, never mind. Go on, kids. Have your fun. There's not enough levity in this day and age. Things seem to be so much better here when everyone's having fun.
It's really, really past my bedtime anyway.
Just an observation and not in any way judgment. It seems as if the people who moan and groan about some idiot & his minions & sycophants put more attention on those they are complaining about than the idiot & his minions & sycophants--i.e. the people who bitch about SALT shine a bigger spotlight on him than the very small band of SALT admirers.
are flargy and SALT your real names?
YES
Salt, You're not really from DFW. A check of your ISP tracks you to Lubbock. Sorry, you're a liar, AND a complete jackass.
Mona Lisa, I think clover was asking you if you saw yestardays find, because everybody kept commenting on how pleasant the site comments were because you weren't commenting.
IF YOU'RE TRACKING MY IP TO LUBBOCK, YOU SUCK AT THE INTERNET
Pepper you don't know what you're talking about. The day was pleasant because the imposter must have been at Freshman orientation that day. Don't be a shit stirrer.
i happen to know that SALT really is in the DFW area. sorry, acid...looks like you *do* suck at internet-PI work.
Maybe it was just a gift certificate to BevMo.
I lifeguard in Canada, close to the USA border at a hotel with alot of american guests.. we have to jump in and save kids lives all the time! Most of the time we don't even get a verbal thank you from the parents. They brush it off like it's nothing, when without us paying attention and jumping after thier kids, they would drown. I think it would be nice to recieve a thank you like this from the parents of the kids we save.
I don't think this is about ‘British humour’, and I don't think it has any other meaning than what it says.
It’s about the British reticence to talk about money.
Yes, he really did save their daughter’s life – it wasn’t a major disaster (hence the smiley face) but if Andy hadn't been there she might well have drowned.
The parents want to show their appreciation, but they know he gets paid already (there may even be a sign up at the pool saying ‘Our lifeguards are not permitted to accept payment’ – like when your car breaks down and the AA or RAC man comes and rescues you, and the small print says they aren’t allowed to accept payment so you give him £5 and say ‘I know I’m not supposed to do this, but have a drink on me’). My guess is the envelope contained £20 ($40) or perhaps £10. It’s the thought that counts.
He certainly wouldn’t drink while on duty (any more than the AA or RAC man would) so he knows that the message means ‘Have a drink on us in your own time’, i.e. this is a personal thank you. And he wouldn’t be a lifeguard if he weren’t at least 18 and therefore old enough to drink legally anyway. He won’t be insulted by the size of the gift (well, he might have been if there were only a couple of £1 coins in there) – he’ll appreciate their gratitude and will remember that particular girl and her parents as opposed to all the others who took him for granted and never said thank you for saving their child’s life.
And no, it isn’t ‘on the back of a used envelope’ – they wrote on the front, and it’s ‘used’ now because the lifeguard opened it. Jeez.
And while I’m sleuthing, I think the envelope is from W H Smith. I have one here, with some money in it – it’s a useful size for that, being too small for an A4 size letter. It has that wiggly blue pattern on the inside.
Phew. That was long-winded – sorry. Better get on with some work now.
That’s ‘AA’ as in ‘Automobile Association’ not ‘Alcoholics Anonymous’ by the way.
Isn't part of the joy of FOUND in over analyzing everything?
It is to me.
That being said, I for one think this note smacks of an inside joke.
I can see it now. Some fun-loving parents are vacationing with their children in tow, and a wayward child gets into trouble of some sort. Not necessarily bad trouble, but the mischevious variety like running around the pool or diving into the shallow end. The poor lifeguard spends his whole day calling down and reminding the child why such rules exist and the parents are right behind him chastising their child for not listening, but not really wanting to ruin their fun day by leaving. The child stubbornly refuses to listen and eventually ends up bumping her head or slipping and falling causing the lifeguard to "rescue" him or her.
Later, the parents feel horrible about all of the trouble their "little darling" has caused the lifeguard and send him this small token to try and make up for their selfish behavior.