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February 01, 2009 |
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Alex B+
FOUND by Sam
in Salt Lake City, UT
I was walking down the street during my counseling session and I found this in the grass.
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
"In a jug there are announces" :D
"I don't like alot of girls"
"He is a big urge"
"He torn his cup apart"
Looks like Alex and been snooping in Daddy's secret stash of gay erotica again...
This teacher's laziness annoys me. She can't be bothered to tell him why he got a B+. Or to make the plus and the circle two separate strokes of her pen. Wow.
Who graded this? 52% is a B+????
2. "lasey" - not a word
3. "alot" should be 2 words
4. should be "worse than"
6. incorrect use of "urge"
7. should be "he tore"
8. "they' should be capitalized
13. should be "doesn't" or "does not"
14. "Champion" should not be capitalized
18. "there" should be capitalized
19. incorrect use of "announces"
I have a big urge, too, but I like a lot of girls.
Ah, I recognize this assignment. Making sentences out of spelling words. Being a literary snob, I used to love doing this way too much.
I think "lasey" is supposed to be "lacey," meaning a girl wrote this.
"In a jug there are announces." lol.. what?!
I'm pretty sure this is a spelling test, so this find must be the jackpot for found magazine fans... because we can pick apart the spelling and that's the point of it! Yes!
I think it's brilliant that they knew how to spell "encyclopedia" but messed up with "lasey."
1. The third kid in class to have a Nintendo game named after him.
2. At least it looked better than Don King's hair.
3. That's why I beat them up.
4. That's why I bit half his ear off.
5. And that's why I bit...
6. Urge to do what, I don't know.
7. So I kicked him in the balls.
8. When they ruled it a TKO.
9. Hurricane, that is. I would've kicked his ass back in the day.
10. In my stomach, that is. That's what happens when your career tanks to the point where you're eating pizza crusts out of trash cans.
11. Yup, it sure is.
12. You know, that guy from the twelve-step "stop biting people's ears" program.
13. This is where I refer to myself in the third person.
14. Well, I used to be, anyway.
15. Hence the biting.
16. The game of Life, that is.
17. It has lots of pictures!
18. Me make up words!
19. Annouces of malt liquor!
that's worth a B+ ?
seriously?
the American school system ladies and gentlemen. where the preferred way to comply with "no child left behind" is to hold ALL the children to the lowest possible standards.
As a mom of a pre-schooler it scares me that this is what passes for B+ work. Are you kidding me? Most of these "sentences" don't even reveal the meaning of the underlined word. Makes me want to drink the "announces" out of the jug!
This made me smile. It reminds me of the homework assignments we'd get in second grade. I can't be the only one to remember how difficult it was to use the words in a sentence... can I?
If one really confused me, I'd try to slip it in an awful sentence like, "He looked up the meaning of 'announces'."
I turned out fine, so I'd say there's hope for this kid (and the school system) yet.
It's so important to drink announces of water every day. Otherwise you could develop a torn cup and laseyness. Untreated, you become an urge.
Tragic really.
You all are being a bit too harsh. I mean, change the first two letters in announces and you have a perfectly acceptable measurement that could be contained in said jug. I'd give the kid a C for showing some imagination.(Remember, he is the Champion)
I dont' like a lot of girls
he turned to me
he is a big urge
(he's gonna) score!
(wow. That was. um. disgusting.)
I like how Champion is capitalized. I'm with ya, Younger in those days.. this is probably the work of a third grader, so OVCOARSE the spelling, grammar, syntax and punctuation aren't spot on. That's why kids GO to school: to learn all that shit. (and we all know it; it's just fun to pick this stuff apart)
Homeschooling a preschooler, I'm wondering if you have older kids, too, who are already perfect.
Never claimed to be home schooling a pre-schooler (hence the pre). Looking toward the future if this is what's available. But it's sweet that you're concerned about my non-existent older children. NOT!
Who mentioned perfectionism? I just want an educated child, not a perfect one. What is the kid learning from this?
I like to read the encyclopedia, too. Alex, you rock!
Wondering about the "He is a good st....."
What is that word? He is a good stensoi?
@Monkey: I couldn't have said it better myself! And don't forget: "It takes a village to raise a child." Seems to me, this village is doing a piss-poor job.
I think this is the best find we've had all week. You can do a lot with it. You can pick apart the grammar and spelling. You can shake it in the face of the Powers That Be, as a prime example of the failure of our American Education System. You can use it as the theme for a debate on Home-Schooling vs Public Schools vs Private Schools. You can even find enough sexual innuendos to outline the plot for a racy short story.
Personally, I'd like to march into that school and slap the teacher silly with it.
"I wore my big lasey hat." That's what our French lady yesterday said.
@fooch - "Sponsor", I believe, is the word you were having trouble reading. i'm pretty sure it's a "P" and not a "T".
this is an awesome find.
My favorite is:
"The game did defeat us"
and the jug has announces. Haha!
he is a big urge??
If it makes anyone feel better, my kids would have gotten a much lower grade on this test. Some kids are learning that vocabulary and spelling are non-negotiable in most cases.
Sooo...which ones are incorrect, according to the teacher? You'd think the one with the squiggly red lines. But what's wrong with "He turned to me."?
does he/she like to 'raid' the encylclopedia or 'read'it....?
I come up with 53% (not 52%) which doesn't change the "F" at all, but I feel strongly that this student should be given every possible advantage.
Perhaps the teacher grades on a curve. If so, the real 'find' would be the student who got a "D-" (as nobody who shows up, I presume, fails in this class.)
@ Schooling in Home: I'm sorry if this sounds rude, but how do you home school a preschooler? It isn't even a required level of academics.
@Schooling in home- sorry, I posted this hours ago but it only now just showed up. I see said issue has been resolved. I feel like a big urge.
I think this is a product of 2 kids playing school. No Teacher would give this a B+!
For many of my 2nd graders, this would be very good work. Nice spacing between words, forgot to start with a capital ONLY 2 times, didn't start every single sentence with "I", used legible handwriting, completed the assignment. I take the 25 kids that walk into my classroom each day, with all their emotional, psychological, behavioral, learning, family, etc. issues, and I accept, ecourage and teach them to the best of my ability day after day for 40K a year. And I've been teaching since the 80's. I love my job, I love my students but it's people like you who have commented on this today that make me want to quit. YOU try it.
@Teacher in your town: I have. I am a teacher. All those things you mentioned are incredibly important. However I must respectfully disagree. I believe the lack of attention given to this paper and subsequently to this student, is shameful.
I cannot support grading purely to boost a child's self esteem. Of course, point out the positives, but to teach is to correct, and to correct, errors must be acknowledged.
It is unfair to allow students to believe they are earning B+ grades when they are not. At some point they will have to go out into the real world, where they will need to know how to read, write, and most importantly, deal with criticism.
To me, no greater pride exists, for either of us, than when a child, who has struggled with a subject, EARNS their first "A" grade.
No, they can't be expected to know it all. They never will if someone does not care enough to take the time to truly mark the errors, explain what they did incorrectly, and tell them how to do better the next time.
I too, love my students. I love them enough be tough on them, to work with them when they are frustrated, and reward them for work WELL done.